Thursday, November 9, 2017

Teeth



I know, you're thinking this is a post about the exotic Tooth Djinn, Huma Abedin, whose hopes for power were shattered by the repellent Weiner. 




Then again, maybe you think it's about Huma's special friend, the Old Crone, who was renowned for her fine teeth before she found herself "lost in the woods."




Or perhaps you're thinking it's about Joe "Trans" Biden, whose prize winning teeth were thwarted of presidential ambition when their billionaire backer, Prince Wally, got himself thrown in the Ritz slammer thanks to the Magic Kingdom's recent night of long knives.





 Good call, vast international readership but not so fast. Because this well known mind blog isn't remotely narcissistic, the teeth in question belong to me, kind of. It started back in January when I pulled myself together and marched into a catastrophically expensive dentist.






"Holy Horseman," he announced like a cowboy, "I'm gonna have to weld those sonsabitches together in case you sneeze and blow your teeth all over the cabin of that plane to London!" He did, and I managed a trip to England without losing the all important front runners. They stood firm, like our brave men at Waterloo or Jackson at Bull Run.




Once back in the Lone Star State, I dodged the Maseratis to get into the dental clinic. "Why howdy! They all gotta go," was the cheerful verdict and damning xray evidence backed it up. There was all kinds of infection lurking around the sturdy jawline. And that's bad because it can mysteriously navigate down to the heart and kill you, stone dead.




So out came the few remaining ivories, in went a couple of implants and on popped a set of falsies and a couple of bottles of synthetic opium. Opioids, they call it and apparently they're a scourge. Just see the video page of this blog and you'll see, QED.




Since then, life has been mostly about driving to Dallas to get the teeth seen to and today was no exception. You see, readers, getting bionic teeth replacement may sound like a walk in the park but it isn't. Still, thanks to the Diocese of Fort Worth it's possible. Thank you, Bishop Iker, 100%.
I file this story under "teeth in rural and not so rural Texas."

God bless,

LSP

Wednesday, November 8, 2017

MAGAversary!




A year ago today, Trump won and won big, shocking pundits, experts and media geniuses everywhere. So here's one from the vaults.

Keep it up, DJT, and drain the swamp.

MAGA,

LSP

Is This Wales?!?



No, it's not Wales, it's Texas and water was falling from the sky; Skywater, we call it, or "rain." It's falling now, in that persistent, steady way that makes Aberystwyth and Llandrindod Wells so appealing to holiday goers.


A Nonchalant Skywater Selfie

Of course here in the Lone Star State rain's a novelty to be enjoyed and the experts in off-grid, DIY preparedness tell us that enough falls to keep a homestead in water for a year. 


Shotgun's In Bits

You have to collect it in cisterns and then, when civilization falls, you can drink and wash like a Water Lord. We don't have cisterns at the Compound, foolishly, though there are plenty of guns and I took advantage of the rain to clean a few. 


Filthy Little Beast

It was relaxing to oil up the machinery of the things while listening to the soothing sound of skywater and I thought of the various adventures I'd had with them. Hunting the noble unicorn, for example. That made me want to get out in the field with a shotgun and blast away in the rain.


No, This Isn't Aberystwyth

Instead, I climbed in the rig and collected the Cadet from school. He's doing well, keep those As coming, kid.

Gun Rights,

LSP

Tuesday, November 7, 2017

UFO Hunters Find ACoC On Mars!



Amazed UFO hunters believe they've discovered ACoC (Anglican Church of Canada) on the surface of the red planet.

Images of the crashed 1.3 mile long object were discovered in footage from NASA's Mars Global Surveyor, leading xenologists to conclude that ACoC had at last been found.


ACoC Enhanced

“I have processed, colorized and rebuilt the object and in my opinion it is ACoC," stated one expert, "The object is too degraded to enhance totally so I have rebuilt it using the points of interest, it's also over a mile long, so this must have been a mothership, either a Martian one or possibly an off planet alien species. That's when we realized we had found ACoC, but why did it crash?”

Why did it crash, on Mars?


Why Did It Crash?

That, readers, is a very good question.

Ad Astra,

LSP

Monday, November 6, 2017

Texas Massacre



Texas is rocked by the worst mass shooting in the Lone Star State's history. By now we all know the details, how Devin Kelley fired five magazines of 5.56 into a small church in Sutherland Springs, killing at least 26 people and wounding 20 more.

Thank God  for the plumber who had the bravery and skill to shoot and chase the deranged Kelley, putting an end to his killing. Kelley's motive? Apparently domestic conflict with his in-laws was the motive and doubtless his aggressive atheism made shooting up a church all the more appealing. 




How could this catastrophe have been prevented? By the Airforce reporting domestic abuse Kelley to the FBI on his dishonorable discharge, which might have stopped him from buying a firearm. Or, as a noted art philosopher commented, "By everyone qualified to carry a weapon actually carrying one." 




Good point. If everyone had been carrying their pistols Kelley wouldn't have got so far. That he did, and that such a thing occurred at all is a tragedy.

Pray for the victims of this atrocity and their families.

LSP

Melania Mondays!



Mondays can be bad, no doubt about it, just ask Bob Geldof, which is why we're bringing you another uplifting episode of Melania Mondays! on the life of America's popular, attractive and glamorous First Lady. 




Some may call her a "bitch-goddess" of "ultra-feminity," but that's not what Japanese children thought as they adoringly hugged the former Yugoslavian model at a Tokyo school.




Described by CNN in a rare moment of truthfulness as looking "demure" in Dior, Melania was met by some 200 rapturous students at the Kyobashi Tsukiji Elementary School. The children loved America's First Lady and who can blame them?




After a group photo, Melania went on to practice calligraphy with the youngsters before a joyous send off and lunch with Mrs. Abe.




Well done Melania, for doing your part to make America great again on your first presidential tour of Asia.

MAGA,

LSP

Friday, November 3, 2017

It's OK To Be White


Is it OK to be white, or is it? Not if you're a school in Maryland, in which case it's a bad crime. 




Whatever, /pol did a good job of triggering the snowflakes. Well done.




But seriously, regardless of the fact that a mere 13% of the populace commit over 50% of the nation's crime, is it OK to be white?




No, in some cases it isn't but perhaps that begs the question. Maybe it's not OK to be colored with corruption, like an NWO, Illuminati shill puppet.

Cheers,

LSP

All Saints & Souls



You've probably been far too busy with the noble sport of unicorn hunting to get to church, but that's a mistake. You see, there's been a lot of feasting. On Wednesday we celebrated the Feast of All Saints and on Thursday the Feast of All Souls.




Powerful stuff, eh? And let's not hear any nonsense about "idolatry" or "soul sleep." Think instead of the miraculous efficacy of the prayers the saints, not least the Virgin Mary who destroyed the Moslem Sea Jihad at Lepanto. Well done, Rosary, you work.




May the Saints intercede for us and the souls of the faithful departed rest in peace.

God bless,

LSP

Wednesday, November 1, 2017

Unicorn Hunting



I can't remember a time when I haven't hunted unicorns but some times stand out, such as today. 

Consider the options. Stare, slack-jawed at the computer as it records Manafort's fall from grace or get out in the field, after the noble unicorn.

Thanks to Compound News, I chose the latter option. And you know what they say, better outdoors.

All the colors of the rainbow,

LSP

Sunday, October 29, 2017

We Drove Through Fire To Get To Houston



No fooling, the team was driving to Houston when all of a sudden, out of nowhere, the traffic on I45 slowed to a standstill. Why? Because the road was on fire. Seriously, smoke was drifting across the highway thanks to some Anarcho-Marxist setting the verge on fire in an act of random highway terrorism.


Win The Firefight

We fought through the obstacle, hoping that the fire didn't spread to the surrounding brush and cause a conflagration, engulfing Leon County. It didn't, thank God, and before you could say phony Russian collusion story, the fabled towers of Houston were looming in the windshield of the rig.


MAGA Loves Gold

Then it was time for the inner loop and MAGAland as the sun bounced golden off the glassy sides of Houston's infamous Dalek. A great result and somehow teaching. "Round or flat?" asked the Cadet (potential), staring into the boundlessly flat horizon. 


Obviously Flat Quite Possibly Hollow

"That's easy, son. It's obviously flat and quite possibly hollow. Think Hillary's failed bid for presidential power."

Later that evening we celebrated at the Lux and I tell you this, a good time was had by all, except maybe the waiter who was from the Ukraine and serving tables after being canned by Fusion GPS. His name was "Slavo", curiously.


Go On LSP, Starch That Shirt And Tackle The Brulee

So well done, Houston, you're a fun place to visit, even if you have to dodge the McLarens and Bentley soft tops. But maybe that's half the charm.

Mind how you go,

LSP

Tuesday, October 24, 2017

Gone GaGa!



Which one of these degenerate presidential clowns is an NWO, Globalist, Elite, Illuminati Snake Stooge? Ha, ha, trick question, they all are. 




But seriously, does GaGa get a pass for wearing a neat white suit, or would that be racist? Here at the Compound we're undecided.

You, the reader, be the judge,

LSP

Coyote Moon



We hunkered down quietly at a clear point in the brush and listened to the Texan dusk. No cars, trains or people, just the undulating sound of locusts, crickets and cicadas gradually filling the soon to be night air. And there it was, the first howl.

No, not the fearsome White Wolf but its prey, a coyote. The howl was joined by a chorus of other howls, yips and barks; an eerie, unearthly, wild sound as the pack went into action in the nearby woods.


A White Wolf

In the absence of wolves, so the experts tell us, coyotes have multiplied beyond reason and become a menace, like laws on a DC statute book. Some people, especially in greater Los Angeles, foolishly feed them and then wonder in baffled consternation when the hungry creatures make off with their children.


Get A New Shotgun LSP

Here in Texas that doesn't happen and people hunt them but we were just in it for the sound of the wild dogs baying at the moon. Still, I had a shotgun close to hand in case a target of opportunity presented itself.

After a time the howls quieted down and the coyotes moved off. We did too, through the thick brush, heading for the truck and burgers at the Compound.




It's good to get out for an armed stroll in the country air as the moon rises, and the dogs remind you that the wilderness isn't that far away.

God bless,

LSP