New Year's Eve

What's New Year's Eve without a visit to a gun shop? With that in mind, I made my way to Proline Shooters, in Inglewood, Calgary. This gun shop is remarkable for having a barber on the premises, which means you can get your hair cut and look at the guns. 

Calgary Capital

Some time ago, the resident barber, Doug, was a cadaverous old communist, who liked to demonize Calgary capitalists as he snipped away at your hair. You'd see him, up into the early hours, talking with the owner of the shop over a bottle of whiskey. Doug died of cancer a few years back; may he rest in peace. 

CarolPeter, Father of One

In other news, you'll be interested to know that the Church of England's first trans clergyperson has died of cancer at the young age of 60. Rev. Carol Stone started off life as Peter Stone and decided to get a sex change in 2000. The Bishop of Swindon, Lee Rayfield, stated, "She was a really true priest who overcame a huge amount in her life."

Alien Hybrid Expert

But CarolPeter wasn't a woman, more of a hybrid man/woman, or as someone put it, "A blasphemous parody of a woman." So I'd argue against calling CarolPeter "she." Still, I hope he/she sorts it all out with the Creator.

Rumors that Justsin Welby's Church of England has become a pansexual pantomime are entirely true.

Cheers,

LSP

Bad Bishop

You have to feel sorry for Thomas Palermo. It's not every day that you go out for a bike ride and get killed by a hit-and-run woman bishop, but that's what happened in Baltimore on Saturday.

Assistant Maryland bishop, Heather Cook, knocked Palermo down in her SUV and didn't play the Good Samaritan. She did drive to her gated community residence, where she was followed by Moncure Lyon, who was determined to get the offending driver's license plate. Perhaps Heather had a guilty conscience, or maybe she saw that she'd been followed. Who knows; she did, however, return to the scene of the crime.

Palermo, a married father of two children, died of his injuries. Cook has a prior DUI conviction.

You can read all about it here.

LSP

Silent Running

One of the reasons I like Calgary is that it's like a science fiction movie. It even has a domed habitat with a tropical forest in it. Like on Silent Running.

The domed arcology is called the "Core," and you could shoot a movie there. Why do the people who walk through this place, shopping, eating, and reading books in a simulated rainforest, seem so content? 

Are they programmed that way? Is their nutrient system enhanced with mild euphorics? Or are the people here simply happy?

I don't know the answer, yet. But I do know that I like the Core and its inhabitants. I hope they reach their mission destination, wherever that it.

To the stars,

LSP

Sunday Snow!

Sometime during the night it began to snow and it hasn't stopped, yet. I'd forgotten what snow was, so I got up to have a cup of coffee and look at the wonder of it. All very magic of Kwanzaatide and they're predicting a lot more tomorrow, which is exciting to me, and a good incentive to look out on the winter wonderland from the fiery comfort of the Hyatt bar. A glass of something warming will be part of this.

But that's for the future. In the meanwhile, I enjoyed myself taking pictures of Stephen Avenue and Calgary's famous Tower, in the snow.

The Tower was lit up for Kwanzaa, which was a nice touch, I thought. I also noticed that the young Canadians who were ordering coffee at the hotel seemed diffident, as though they were apologizing for troubling the Croatian cashier with their purchase. That reminded me of being in England, where there's a tendency for people to cringe, bow and scrape before shopkeepers.

Of course Napoleon said that the English were a nation of shopkeepers and got soundly thrashed for his efforts.

I love the snow.

LSP

Scorned De Blasio Appears on Camera, with Hitler!

The disgraced cop-hating Mayor of New York, Bill De Blasio, has been caught on video with Adolf Hitler, the one-time Fuhrer of the 1000 Year Reich.

The evil dictator can be clearly seen, sitting to the right of the hated Mayor, as he addresses  the funeral of Officer Rafael Ramos. Hundreds of policemen turned their backs on the video image of Blasio, who is accused of having "blood on his hands."

Scorned

So is Adolf Hitler, who had been thought dead until his recent appearance with the scorned Mayor. 

Will the mad Nazi leader and his despised limolib, leftist ally, Bill De Blasio, be brought to justice?

We wait, impatiently.

LSP

Fly to Calgary

By longstanding tradition, I go to Calgary right after Christmas and stay at the Hyatt for a few nights. I like it there and every year they upgrade me by putting me on a higher floor. I like that too because of the view over Stephen Avenue and sunsets over the Rockies, which you can just see on a clear day.

Room with a View

But I didn't like getting up at 4 am to get a cab to DFW on Boxing Day. Maybe it's worth spending a little extra to get a more civilized flight. Still, it was very cheap and got me there.

Typical Canadian Street Scene

So did a near perfect Negroni at the bar of the St. Germaine hotel right 'round the corner from the Hyatt. I say near perfect only because it could have been a bit larger. I made up for that deficiency by getting two.

Cheers from the Land of the Ice and Snow.

And God bless Canada,

LSP

Busted!

Presented with no comment, via everyone's fave pagan. Why? if you have to ask...

Cheers,

LSP

Land of the Ice and Snow

It was a typical Christmas morning for me. Roosters crowing, dogs barking, Mexicans wearing Santa hats and getting in the Navidad spirit. I like all of that. Then I drove to Dallas, to spend Christmas with all the other ninjas in the DLC. I like that too.

And the table looks good, HQ style. I fly to the land of the ice and snow tomorrow. It's a tradition.

Have a great Feast and a Merry Christmas!

LSP

Felix Navidad!

Ho, ho, ho! Merry Christmas! Navidad music fills the air, which is crisp and the stars are bright, and that's what it's like, here in Texas.

God bless you all,

LSP

Almost Christmas

While you're all recovering from Festivus and getting ready for Kwanzaa, I'm gearing up for the first Masses of Christmas, fortified by Huevos Rancheros, strong coffee, and corn tortillas.

Excuse me?

Here's some Austin Farrer to reflect on before Mass:

“WHEN Mary laid Jesus Christ upon her knees, when she searched him with her eyes, when she fed him at the breast, she did not study to love him because she ought, she loved him because he was dear: he was her Son. His conception had been supernatural, perplexing, affrighting; it had called for faith in the incomprehensible, and obedience beyond the limit of human power. His nativity was human and sweet, and the love with which she embraced it was a natural growth, inseparable from the thing she loved. She was blessed above all creatures, because she loved her Maker inevitably and by simple nature; even though it needed the sword—wounds of the Passion to teach her fully that it was her Maker whom she loved. The Son of Mary is the Son of all human kind; we embrace him with the love of our kind, that we may be led up with Mary to a love beyond kind, a selfless love for the supreme Goodness, when we too shall have climbed the ladder of the cross.”

I love that -- the Farrer, not the random dancing priestess, obviously.

God bless,

LSP

Protesters Shut Down Episcopal Church

Furious New Yorkers are protesting against the Episcopal Church (TEC). Rumors that TEC is richer than a trainload of Nazi gold are entirely true false.

Maybe NYPD will go out on strike. Yes please.

Festivus!

LSP

Festivus.

"Well, so-called LSP, how did you keep Festivus?" Good question and the answer's simple. I kept Festivus by eating BBQ.

But it was a sad celebration, because it marked the death of one of our Church Wardens. He was a good man. He'd been in the Army and was retired from Dallas PD; I used to greet him at church with a Brit-style salute and he'd always return a snappy American one. He loved guns too, especially Glocks, and I'd say:

"Look, you're Junior Warden, which means you're in charge of Buildings and Grounds."

"Yes, LSP, I am."

"Well then, I think we need to build a shooting house."

"Well I'll get right on it!"

We never did, sadly. Maybe memorial money can go towards that cause.

After the funeral Mass, an interesting looking older woman congratulated me on the service, so I suggested that she come to the Mission on Sundays. "No," she said emphatically. "Why not?" I asked. "Because I'm not an Episcopalian," she replied and I resisted the urge to say "neither are we," as she went on, "I am a Child of God." Her friend chimed in, "No you're not, you're a dam Hindoo."

Make of that what you will, and say a prayer for Loyd. He was an outstanding man with a kind and gentle spirit.

I do not say that lightly.

LSP

DeBlasio Must Go.

DeBlasio, you must resign. You are hated and despised. You have betrayed your civic trust and now you have to go. You are on the side of Jihad, of Ismaaiyl Abdullah Brinsley and Al Sharpton. There is no room for you here anymore. 

NYPD has turned its back on you and we have, too. You need to go while you can. There is blood on your hands. NYPD BA Patrick Lynch summed it up:

“We tried to warn it must not go on. It cannot be tolerated, That blood on the hands starts on the step of City Hall in the office of the mayor. When these funerals are over, those responsible will be called on the carpet and held accountable.”

Jihad Jackass

DeBlasio, you have been called. You must not be allowed to prospect for votes at the cost of lives. You must go.

We scorn and despise you.

LSP

Advent IV or Yule?

You have a choice today. You can celebrate the 4th Sunday of Advent or you can celebrate the Winter Solstice, which pagans like to call Yule.

Being a Christian, I celebrated Advent IV and reflected on the Virgin Mary, who some people think is "an ordinary Jewish girl," or maybe a dead Roman Catholic. I'd say she wasn't that ordinary and that she intercedes for us in heaven. That would make her catholic but not dead. Others, like Mr. Chick, think she's a Babylonian demon. That's stupid as well as blasphemous.

But that's just me. Some, perhaps many of you, would rather celebrate Yule today and dance around fires while praying to the Horned God.

Go right ahead, but don't say you weren't warned when you wake up inside a Wicker Man. And it's on fire.

God bless,

LSP

Liturgical Dance Will Build Your Church

It's not easy. You want to build your congregation and you know that Liturgical Dance is the way forward. But how do you get there? Simple, sign up for a workshop at Abbey of the Arts. This is what you get, for a mere $375:

"Together we will explore how the healing power of such tools as guided imagery, body awareness, dream work, ritual, poetry, journal writing, visual art, movement, song, and storytelling enrich our own spiritual lives and our work in spiritual direction by giving us access to another language with which to encounter the divine presence within. Participants will develop comfort and skills in using these tools."

Some people think that there's a lot of "dream work" and "story telling" in the church as it is, to say nothing of anything else.

Fascists.

LSP

The Curse of the Diocese of Gloucester

In today's fast-paced, equal opportunities church, there's nothing that breathes the sweet smell of success to a career clergyperson than being promoted to bishop. Well, unless you're unfortunate enough to become the Bishop of Gloucester.

Puritans Rigging up a Curse

That's because the ancient See of Gloucester has been under a curse since Laud, as Dean, dared to set up altar rails, provoking Puritan fury. 

The curse of Gloucester has apparently been active in recent decades. 

Bishop Michael Perham, a noted progleft shill and enthusiastic supporter of women's ordination retired from the troubled diocese after allegations of "indecent assault" against several young women in the 1980s. However, the case against him was dropped after police found no grounds for further action.

Perham's predecessor, Bishop Peter Ball, also had to leave the cursed See in 1993, after admitting to an act of "gross indecency" with a 19 year man. Ball was arrested this November over allegations of sex abuse with 8 boys during the 1980s and early '90s.

So we have to ask, what fortunate member of the Church of England's Talent Pool will get promoted to the poisoned See?

The bets are on.

LSP

Texas Open Carry

When people think of Texas they imagine cowboys, big skies and a Wild West, six gun spirit. Something like this:

"Nearly every man we met with in travelling was armed with a knife, seven-shooter, and double-barrelled shot-gun," stated Brigadier General W.E. Strong, after patrolling Texas with a cavalry force in 1866.

Unsurprisingly, this didn't sit well with the occupying Reconstruction government and Texans were disarmed by the Act to regulate the keeping and bearing of deadly weapons of 1871, leading to the following complaint:

"The police and State guards are armed, and lord it over the land, while the citizen dare not, under heavy pain and penalties, bear arms to defend himself, unless he has reasonable grounds for fearing an unlawful attack on his person, and that such grounds of attack shall be immediate and pressing. The citizen is at the mercy of the policeman and the men of the State Guard, and that too, when these bodies of men embrace in them some of the most lawless and abandoned men in the State, many of whom are adventurers--strangers to the soil--discharged or pardoned criminals..."

Make of that what you will and note that today's ban on openly carrying sidearms in Texas is based on the 1871 Act. Government, it seems, doesn't like to relinquish control over its subjects.

But that looks set to change, with 6 Bills up before Texas' state legislature proposing a repeal of post-Civil War disarmament. Governor Greg Abbott has pledged to sign open carry into law as soon as the relevant bill lands on his desk. Until then, here's Sam Houston, Commander-in-Chief of the Army of Texas, writing in 1835:

"[T]he Dictator required the surrender of the arms of the civic militia, that he might be enabled to establish, on the ruins of the Constitution, a system of policy which would forever enslave the people of Mexico. Zacatecas, unwilling to yield her sovereign rights to the demand, which struck at the root of all liberty, refused to disarm her citizens of their private arms. Ill-fated State! her power, as well as her wealth, aroused the ambition of Santa Anna, and excited his cupidity. Her citizens became the first victims of his cruelty, while her wealth was sacrificed in payment for the butchery of her citizens. The success of the usurper determined him in exacting from the people of Texas submission to the Central form of Government; and, to enforce his plan of despotism, he despatched a military force to invade the Colonies, and exact the arms of the inhabitants. The citizens refused the demand, and the invading force was increased. The question then was, shall we resist oppression and live free, or violate our oaths, and wear a despot's stripes?"

Gun rights,

LSP

Madonna, Illuminati Witch

Fabled pop icon, Madonna, has claimed that celebrity New World Order libs, like Oprah, aren't members of her secret occultist group, the Illuminati.

Of course.

They're not occultists.

Not for a minute.

Unlike Madonna, who is a well-known witch. Here's what she has to say in her new album:

"Teach me how to pray, and we can do drugs, and we can smoke weed, and we can drink whiskey. 'Yeah we can get high, and we can get stoned, and we can sniff glue, and we can do E, and we can drop acid," sings Madonna on her track 'Make the Devil Pray.'"

The Vatican is calling for more Exorcists. For obvious reasons.

Nice grill, Madonna. Vade Retro Satana,

LSP