Tree Wrangling

In the olden days, which I can just remember, you didn't decorate your tree until Christmas Eve but that's changed now. We went looking for trees in Dallas on Monday with a view to getting the job done. 

First stop? Lowes, and I'll be honest, their selection was rubbish. Home Depot was better and we found a tree without too much hassle; a bit on the small side but it'd do. 

Small!

Back at HQ the tree went obediently into its stand and there it was, a Christmas tree in a stand, looking annoyingly short. "I have to say, it looks a bit dam short," I told Ma LSP, who suggested we raise it on some kind of platform. But we didn't, the Angel would make it taller perhaps.

Angel

It helped, along with lights and ornaments which glittered and gleamed like Christmas is supposed to do. Blue ADC did his bit to help, which mostly involved sleeping at guard and that seemed homely and somehow reassuring. 

All Lit Up

Dog and Christmas tree, sort of thing. A few hours later the tree seemed pretty much there, so we moved outside and lit up the front.

Getting There

Good work and well done, team, you've put up Christmas or most of it anyway. Mission accomplished, we fell back to the kitchen and celebrated the victory. For Blue Voracious that meant treats, well deserved. 

And that readers, all six of you, is the story of that. If you're a Puritan you'll disapprove because you think Christmas, when we celebrate the birth of Christ, is pagan, popish idolatry. Long story short, no, it isn't.

God bless,

LSP

Hadrian IV The English Pope

England, once known as Mary's Dowry for its devotion to Our Lady and catholic spirit, has produced one Pope. Born Nicholas Brakespear, Adrian or Hadrian IV became the Vicar of Christ on December 4th, 1154, so today's his anniversary.

Adrian came from Hertfordshire and entered the religious life in France where he was known as a formidable disciplinarian. I'm no expert, but I reckon the papacy could do with a bit of that right about now.

You can read all about him on the annoying Wikipedia, have a look. Thanks, Mr. Wolf, for the heads up.

Ubi Petrus,

LSP

Dallas Light Cav Rides Against the Turk

Hmmmm, it's the Australians, but you get the drift. Speaking of which, I love running horses, total exhilaration. But imagine doing that in the face machine guns, canon and all the rest.

Over to you, RHSM Ragnar.

Charge!

LSP

VIVE LA FRANCE

A new year, a new revolt against our corrupt elite overlords. Witness Paris, which is in flames because Faux Bonaparte Napoleon (FBN) Macron tried to levy a sneaky weather tax on diesel.

Guess what, the people didn't like that and decided to burn down "gay Paree" rather than pay the hated Green Tyrant. Weird, they didn't want to make him any richer.

Two-Bit Rothschild Fraud

See, here's the thing. Global Warming or Climate Change, aka The Weather, is a massive Illuminati, NWO, transnational elite  scam to get you, the mug punter end user, to give the State even more of your money. To tax you even more than you are already.

Sorry NWO, Had Enough

So go right ahead. Feed the insatiable maw of big government and the Macronite ponzi. On the other hand, set Paris alight and say taxed enough already.

Tea Time,

LSP

Advent

It's the first Sunday of Advent, and we're getting ready to celebrate the birth of Christ at Christmas and preparing to meet Him on the Last Day, the second Advent. Here's a prayer, the governing collect of the season:

ALMIGHTY God, give us grace that we may cast away the works of darkness, and put upon us the armour of light, now in the time of this mortal life, in which thy Son Jesus Christ came to visit us in great humility; that in the last day, when he shall come again in his glorious majesty to judge both the quick and the dead, we may rise to the life immortal, through him who liveth and reigneth with thee and the Holy Ghost, now and ever. Amen.

The armour of light. The Apostle teaches us (Rom. 13:11-14) that this is nothing less than Christ Himself.  Austin Farrer illuminates:

Advent brings Christmas, judgement runs out into mercy. For the God who saves us and the God who judges us is one God. We are not, even, condemned by his severity and redeemed by his compassion; what judges us is what redeems us, the love of God. What is it that will break our hearts on judgement day? Is it not the vision, suddenly unrolled, of how he has loved the friends we have neglected, of how he has loved us, and we have not loved him in return; how, when we came (as now) before his altar, he gave us himself, and we gave him half-penitences, or resolutions too weak to commit our wills? But while love thus judges us by being what it is, the same love redeems us by effecting what it does. Love shares flesh and blood with us in this present world, that the eyes which look us through at last may find in us a better substance than our vanity.

If you're a bit slow on the uptake, like me, you might want to read the above several times. In the meanwhile, Paris burns.

God bless,

LSP

Four Season's Greetings

Yes, the Four Seasons and I liked it a lot, perhaps because it's less expensive than its sisters in other parts of the world. At this local branch of the franchise, chicken Quesadillas only cost $8.00 as opposed to $18.00 and guess what, they're just as tasty.

Conversation was good too, ranging from dog training, night vision systems, hay bale house construction and off-grid living, to pistol shooting and theology. Everyone agreed that liberal clergypersons had no business spreading their vapid wizardry and that "city priests" had no business in the country.

A Typical City Priest

"But I'm a city priest," I announced proudly, and the former head of Dallas SWAT took a bite of his steak, "You're different." Well he had a point and ten years of living, riding, shooting, hunting and fishing in country Texas counts. I wouldn't swap it out for the metrosprawl, that's for sure. 

Saying that, I miss London, pubs, butchers, book shops, the French House in Soho and all kinds of things about England. That said, Texas has frontier spirit. Don't ever scorn it.

The Lights Are Going on all Over Texas

By the time I got back to the heart of this thriving rural metropolis, the lights were on in the square.

Season's Greetings,

LSP

Climate Change Settled Science

"You see, the government needs money, huge amounts of it 

just to stay alive in the elite luxury they're accustomed to. 

Penthouse apartments on the Champs Elysee 

and Mews getaways in Knightsbridge don't come cheap." LSP

And that's just it, like Mars needs women the government needs cash, lots of it, and the only way it can get it is by taking it from you with the threat of force. The fly in the ointment, currently, is that our elected officials are just that, elected, and raising the levy doesn't sit well with the voters. So what to do?

Introduce a tax that isn't a tax, a stealth tax dressed up in terms that appeal to the demographically ascendant Woodstock generation. A tax that says pay this or fragile planet earth will be destroyed and goddess Gaia with it! Then watch the mug punter hippies climb aboard and agree to give the government more money. Heck, they can afford it, in between lattes.

Unless they're French, in which case they're rioting and burning cars in downtown Paris over the hated faux Napoleon Macron's tax on deisel. All in the name of stopping Climate Change, aka the weather, but really about giving the Rothschild's puppet government moar money. 

The serfs don't like that and the gloves are off. Don't use our old enemy, The Weather, as an excuse to raise taxes, contemptible Macron. But here's the thing.

Like all right thinking people I scorn big government and its insatiable demand for money it hasn't earned. It reeks of despotism, tyranny and corruption and the larger the more so. But as a sportsman who loves the countryside, I hate pollution.

So why can't the government be honest and appeal for funds to stop the scourge of plastic in our oceans and the destruction of nature. Why? Because honesty isn't in it. Our transnational, private island overlords don't care about pollution, much less the weather, and aren't about to spend your cash on putting that right. But they do want an excuse to get your money, they always want moar. It defines them.

Regardless of the dishonesty, which is hateful, we're in for another Ice Age because the Sun's had enough of being hot. Smart people are getting their bob sleds ready for runs across a frozen English Channel and a disarmed populace.

Don't say loot,

LSP

Rise Of The Witch

Once consigned to the realms of bigotry, superstition, fable and myth, witches have been making a comeback and now outnumber Presbyterians in the US.

According to the Pew Research Center, 1.5 million Americans identified with pagan and Wiccan witch cults. By contrast, mainline Presbyterianism (PCUSA) trailed behind the occultists at 1.4 million members. 

America's rapidly growing witch cult was galvanized into action by the election of Donald Trump in 2016 and lost no time in setting up the Magic Resistance. The Magic Resistance organizes regular rituals to curse Trump and his supporters, and "bind" the President. 

But the spells go further than "binding." One, used against Justice Kavanaugh, reads, "The king is dead, hear us scream, tear off his head, burn his bones, salt the earth, rage is our song, rage is our mother." And sample rituals pray to demons.

Hear me, oh spirits

Of Water, Earth, Fire, and Air

Heavenly hosts

Demons of the infernal realms

And spirits of the ancestors

Well sure, it's all a fun-and-games, raise the Pentagon stunt like the Temple of Satan itself. But pause for a moment and ask yourself why America's rapidly growing witch cult almost uniformly sides with the Democrats. 

The same Party, you may recall, who wrote off Podesta's part in Marina Abramovic's hellish Spirit Cooking (performance art?) as a big so what.

Reflect on that and the fact of these people invoking demons and casting spells. Such is the company of the DNC, to say nothing of Molloch's child sacrifice industry star, Planned Parenthood. Christians might want to think twice about siding with that.

In the meanwhile, it's all a larf until the, ahem, higher power you've invoked comes alive and you wake up with a demon gnawing on your elbow. Or you're in a wicker cage and it's on fire.

The number of Presbyterians, Episcopalians and clergy in the CofE who identify as witches is currently unknown. As we await stats, the battle lines between good and evil become more sharply drawn.

OUT DEMONS OUT,

LSP

Feast of Saint Andrew

It's the Feast of Saint Andrew, almost, so here's some pipes.

Scotland the Brave,

LSP

State Religion Goes Dhimmwit In Blackburn

If you're a state religion, like the Church of England, it'd be a bit odd if your teaching didn't mirror the state's. Which is awesome as long as the state's Christian, but what happens when it isn't?

Imagine a mythical country where everyone thinks you can change your biologically given gender at will and that anything less is an attack on freedom. 

The freedom to be what you wanna be regardless of your chromosomes. Sure, you've still got to slave away at the cubicle for the Man but you can do it in a frock, because now you're free.

OK. The State Church supports this in our imaginary country and starts telling its few believers that there's no such thing as the fatherhood of God and gets rid of all his oppressive personal pronouns. Boom. Liberty at last.

Now take this small thought experiment a step further.  Say you live in a small town, let's call it Blackburn, where 25% of its 100+k population are Muslim and you decide to hold an "anti war mass" on Armistice Day eve. What happens?

Being a reflection of the state of things, an imam gets up during the beautifully pacifist liturgy and incites Jihad with the Muslim call to prayer or Adhan, thus claiming the cathedral for Islam. 

Speech, as it were, notoriously enacts and there it is, a once Christian cathedral becomes a mosque in the imaginary land of the dhimmwits.

You can read all about this make believe scenario here. The Archbishop of Canterbury's preference for a genderless God is as well known as his love for chinos.

Good luck, CofE,

LSP

Cooking With LSP -- Cyber Monday Pie

"Oh, cooking with LSP, where's that on the spectrum?" Good question. First things first, get a gun and put it on the table, I use a Glock 21 but that's just me. You might prefer a revolver, a Sig, a CZ or a Beretta. Up to you.

Next, boil up leftover beef bones or beef ends, the fatty, gristly stuff you don't want to eat. Add salt and pepper, you're making stock. Let it boil then reduce to a simmer for around an hour or so until the fat's rendering. You'll want around 2 cups worth.

While the stock's doing its thing, chop up an onion, a leek, a carrot or two and peel 4 or 5 cloves of garlic. Don't crush or mince the garlic, this isn't some kind of Macronite, faux Napoleon, globalist assault on traditional value. 

No, throw the whole cloves into the tin with the rest of the veg. Add olive oil and a few tablespoons of butter. Pour a cup+ of beef stock over the veg, then put that bad boy in the oven at 400* to roast. Why?

Because it'll taste good, trust me. Let the veg roast for around an hour, 'til it's starting to char, In the meanwhile, cube up some leftover roast beef, as much as you like, set it aside. 

Boil up a couple of carrots and set them aside, slice some mushrooms in half or leave 'em whole if they're small. Set them aside too. Well done, you're nearly there, so have a glass of wine or seltzer water, your choice. I chose wine.

Thirst assuaged, make a poor man's roux. I use 4 tbls of butter, flour, salt and pepper and a cup of milk+. Cook it up and behold the roux magically thicken, then pour in 1 1/2 cups of stock. Add more stock if needed, up to you.

Stir it 'round like a champion. Add the roast veg, beef, and mushrooms, stir and let simmer for a good 30 minutes. You'll see the roux change color from cream to brown. Such is cooking.

While the beast's simmering away and consolidating like a battle group about to go over the start line, roll out some pasty. I cheat and use pre-made and here's the orthodoxy; don't use puff pastry in a beef pie, use the other sort. But I like the rainbow riding puff, it tastes better. Whatever, your call.

Pastry rolled, pour the simmering awesomeness of beef and veg into a deep pie dish. Stand back and consider the completion of this phase of the advance. Perhaps play some baroque fanfares, up to you. Chivalric reverie over, don't say Agincourt, place the rolled out dough over the mix.

Decorate the in potentia pie crust with leftover dough, then glaze with egg white and put the whole thing in the oven at 375* for as long as it takes, around an hour.

Take it out, let it rest, and eat your scoff like...

A King,

LSP

Archbishop of Canterbury Goes Gender Neutral Christ Still King

By now all the world knows that Justin Welby, the Archbishop of Canterbury, doesn't think God is male or female.

Welby, who's popularly known as Justsin, dropped this theological bombshell at St. Martin-in-the-Fields, stating, “God is not a father in exactly the same way as a human being is a father. God is not male or female. God is not definable."

Good heavens, there was everyone thinking the necessary Being of the Deity was just a scary old bloke in the sky with a beard. Now we know, thanks to Justsin, that God's a bit more than that and we can only speak of the Creator by analogy.

We know where Justsin's earthshaking logic leads. God's a perfect spirit, beyond gender so, drum roll... we should have wimmin priests and bishops, trans education in church schools, and get rid of all those pesky male personal pronouns invented by the patriarchy to keep the people down.

Let's go further, in the bold spirit of boundary breaking Justsinian theological inquiry. 

God's neither male nor female, obviously, so we deploy gendered language to describe the divinity as a kind of construct. And what's human gender but an invention, a construct? Which means that hybrid no-sex transsexuals reflect the reality of God better than anyone else. So make them bishops.

The problem with this, apart from the fact that it's completely wrong, is that some analogies are better than others and that the ones we use, as Christians, are definitively revealed in the Person of Christ, who was notoriously a Man and taught us to pray to God as Father. Geoffery Kirk, at Ignatius, makes the point and you can read it here.

But feel free to break with revelation in favor of the spirit of the age, disregarding the truth given to us by the Word made Flesh. Go right ahead, disobey your Sovereign King and see where it gets you. 

Just don't be surprised if you wake up to find a demon gnawing on your shinbone.

Viva El Cristo Rey,

LSP