Sunday, September 20, 2020

Mantid Takeover

Do aliens live among us? Technologically advanced creatures from another star or dimension which have the ability to appear human but are, in fact, extraterrestrials? Could they be hiding in plain sight?

What's their agenda; power, wealth, world domination and the enslavement of humanity? The gradual replacement of mankind with a race of freakish hybrids, drones of the hive mind collective which slavishly do their off-world rulers' bidding?

Are they present in the very institutions we hold dear? The Armed Forces, our revered political class, media and entertainment industry? Even Hollywood itself may not be exempt. To say nothing of our financial institutions, perhaps you remember Dominique Strauss-Kahn.

Some say aliens, Mantis People or Mantids, can even be found at the highest levels of our Holy Mother the Church, where they subvert and twist the Gospel for their own purple-robed, insectoid ends.

Here at the Compound we reached out to Lambeth Palace for comment, but spokespyrsxns for Archbishop Justsin Welby refused to return our calls. 

Were they too busy purging systemic racism, tearing down statues, and creating gender neutral safe spaces for once innocent CoE students? 

Possibly. Never forget, Mantids do not think as we do.

Ad Astra,



Anonymous said...

What happened to the lizards?

LL said...

Pictures don't lie.

There are fewer mantids in the country than in the city. I expect there are very few if any in Hillsboro. Why is that?

Jim said...

Not many here as well, though they seem numerous up in KC. I just wonder. What's a good load for a mantid. Will 5.56 be enough or will I need something heavier? Asking for a friend.

LSP said...

Mantids currently have the upper hand, Anon.

LSP said...

LL, I think snakes play a large part. They EAT the Mantids. That, and country people are far less likely to put up with their insectoid skulduggery.

LSP said...

Good question, Jim. 5.56 works but the round has a tendency to go through the Mantid without stopping it.

I recommend a sturdy 12 gauge pump loaded with buckshot, and a .45, just in case things get close.

But that's just me.

Kid said...

I submitted your question to some of my alien contacts who live in France (C'est la vie! [alien spelling: Sacre Bleu!]). They like French food !
Anyhoo, they tell me they are all in constant stitches watching the crazy bipedal critters and their antics on this otherwise beautiful planet. They say it reminds them of the show Gilligan's Island and they asked me to see if I could get that back on TV. I told them I'd try.

I figure DJ Trump as the Skipper, Biden as Gilligan, AOC as Maryanne, Melania as Ginger, Elon Musk as the Professor, My wife and I was Mr and Mrs Howell. Should be a hoot.

LSP said...

That's a great cast, Kid.

Gotta love French cooking. Mind you, English country food's good too... dammit, country cooking's good full stop. Except in Africa, imo, where it tastes like offal and sewage. Maybe I wasn't in the right places...

Kid said...

I love Texas food, but when it comes to aliens, the snootier the better. I hear they don't tip well though.