Friday, November 13, 2015

It's The Fryday Roundup

It's hard to concentrate, here in the Newsroom, over the sheer din of The Whine, caused by the custodians of our national conscience, rich, privileged, entitled students, who have risen up to challenge the injustice and oppression endemic in the soul destroying gulags that are this country's universities.

Be that as it may, the News must get through. 

Here's some highlights.

Jihad terrorists hit Paris. Breaking.

But here in the US, things are getting serious on Campus.

Yale Whine
Simmering discontent on American campuses became an outraged whine,  as furious students sparred with faculty at Yale, demanding their right to not be offended by Halloween costumes. At Mizzou, mobs of chanting children forced  the low-tier school's President and Chancellor to resign, for not apologizing for "white privilege." But that didn't stop one white Mizzou professor from threatening a journalist with "muscle." 

Melissa Click subsequently resigned from her position at Mizzou's prestigious school of journalism, but remains on the faculty.

Protests then spread like wildfire across the country, becoming the Million Whine March, with enraged protesters lying down in the middle of campus pathways, writing emails, shrieking into megaphones, and waving #BlackLivesMatter placards. 

Sensing an opportunity, heavy-hitting Democrat donors are apparently planning to broaden their party's voting base by sponsoring the #BlackLivesMatter movement. But how will this affect Hillary?

World-renowned pop star, Sister Souljah, has accused Democratic Party frontrunner, Hillary Clinton, of being a slave owning plantation wife. “She reminds me too much of the slave plantation white wife of the white ‘master,’ ” Souljah said, according to Time.

Souljah, who recommended that blacks kill whites for a week, in 1992, is a supporter of #BlackLivesMatter. Does this mean that the Democracy Alliance will walk away from Hillary?

Who knows, but what we do know is that the declining Church of Iceland (there is one) has made gay marriage compulsory.

The Church of Iceland has told its clergypersons that they have to perform gay marriages. A 2007 conscience clause allowed clergy to opt out of the gay marriage rituals, but this has been overturned. Speaking at the denomination's Church Council, Rev. Helgudóttir argued that the declining church had to “take things the whole way and place no limits on human rights.” Except, of course, if you're weird and oppressive enough to think that marriage is something that occurs between a man and a women.

Not to be outdone, the Church of Norway's House of Bishops has decided to create gay marriage liturgies. The decision has to be approved by the church's Synod next year before taking effect. As of 2013, 8 out of 12 bishops in the Norwegian denomination are in favor of gay weddings.

But that's the Vikings for you. In the meanwhile, the Church of England just got a bit less gay.

Canon Jeremy Pemberton, who according to Virtueonline was married with five children before deciding to go gay, has lost a discrimination lawsuit over being turned down for a job as hospital chaplain. Pemberton got married to his gay lover in April, 2014, and had his "permission to officiate" revoked.

The Church of England doesn't allow its clergy to marry their gay partners, but it does allow them to live together in a "civil partnership."

Confused? Neither are we, and the same can be said for unsuspecting Californians, who were terrified by bright lights in the sky.

Frightened San Diego residents were shocked by what at first appeared to be a missile, or a Taureid meteor shower, streaking across the night sky of the LA basin. But it was just the rogue Diocese of San Diego, warping out of deep space on its way to shut another parish. After its brief appearance, the diocese left earth to return to its home in the icy depths of interstellar space.

Bishop James Mathes was unavailable for comment.

Ad Astra,



jenny said...

Well. This was an enjoyably amusing (if full of annoying issues) round up... until it was updated with the most current events in Paris, and then tragedy took over.

But still-- carry on with the Frydays!

LSP said...

It certainly did -- hard to be lighthearted in the face of that.