Charity, Brethren

A big part of the famous LSP lifestyle involves getting into the rig, driving out into the countryside, and visiting the sick. Sometimes I take Blue Caritas; he can play with his dog pals while I look after pastoralia. But here's a serious thought, as you bite into your refreshing Obamka ice cream treat.

Yum

You can, and should, be as orthodox as the day is long. Go right ahead, memorize the Summa, have Gilson and Maritain at your fingertips, be able to parse scripture like Farrer and take on the error of our times like the fabled Chesterbelloc. 

Bad Deacon!

Good job, well done. But without love, it amounts to nothing and worse. The Apostle shoots in the X Ring, in his Epistle to the Corinthians:

Though I speak with the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I have become sounding brass or a clanging cymbal. And though I have the gift of prophecy, and understand all mysteries and all knowledge, and though I have all faith, so that I could remove mountains, but have not love, I am nothing.  And though I bestow all my goods to feed the poor, and though I give my body to be burned, but have not love, it profits me nothing.

A clanging cymbal. There's a warning in that and while you finish off your delicious Obamka, say a prayer that priests and pastors are given the grace to live into the precepts of charity.

That doesn't mean, by the way, that Hillary shouldn't go to jail.

God bless,

LSP

Obamka, A Special Treat

Perhaps you're looking for that special Mother's Day treat. Look no further. Russia presents you with the "Obamka", or "Little Obama." In Russian, the diminutive suffix "ka" is used to express affection, or derision.

The ice cream treat features a hard shell of delicious milk chocolate around a white vanilla interior and a stick runs up its rear, enabling handlers to grip the Obamka firmly.

Obamka Licks Cone

Slavitska, which produces the popular ice cream novelty, insists any similarities between Obamka and the outgoing US President are imaginary:

“With different flavors and glazes, this [line of] ice cream will stand for the main races on our planet. Ice cream names need to be memorable. For those with a vivid imagination, various associations might come to mind, but this product is for children and is a long way from politics."

Obamka Eats Rainbow

Vicious rumors that Team LSP is sponsored by Slavitska are baseless, without foundation and entirely that, rumors.

Russian strongman, Vladimir Putin, has a vodka, Putinka, named after him.

здоровье!

LSP

They Were Seized With Madness And Danced

"If you watched a modern interpretative dance... you may well conclude the dancer was having some kind of seizure and perhaps suffering some pain or disease to cause such 
unnatural motions." (Via Adrienne's Catholic Corner)

We like to imagine, understandably, that liturgical dance is a modern phenomenon, brought on by the madness of our troubled age. But that's not true, otherwise normal Christians have been seized by dancing insanity in the past.

In the 14th and 15th centuries, dancing "plagues" gripped whole regions of Europe. Even convents were not immune:

Not long before the Strasbourg dancing epidemic, an equally strange compulsion had gripped a nunnery in the Spanish Netherlands. In 1491 several nuns were ‘possessed’ by devilish familiars which impelled them to race around like dogs, jump out of trees in imitation of birds or miaow and claw their way up tree trunks in the manner of cats. Such possession epidemics were by no means confined to nunneries, but nuns were disproportionately affected (Newman, 1998). Over the next 200 years, in nunneries everywhere from Rome to Paris, hundreds were plunged into states of frantic delirium during which they foamed, screamed and convulsed, sexually propositioned exorcists and priests, and confessed to having carnal relations with devils or Christ.

What causes this "dancing madness"? Is it Satan, mind-altering drugs, or a simple case of mental illness? Whatever the cause, the affliction has resurfaced in our own time. And remember...

Liturgical Dance is not awesome,

LSP 

Say a Prayer for Alberta

A raging forest fire in Alberta, covering over 300 square miles, has destroyed whole areas of Fort McMurray, causing Canadian authorities to evacuate some 90,000 citizens. 

According to the BBC, a 1,500 vehicle convoy of evacuees heading south to Edmonton and Calgary has had to be suspended due to 200 foot high flames on either side of the highway.

Scenes from the fire are apocalyptic and the RCMP estimates it will take another 4 days to evacuate people from the threatened area.

Say a prayer for Alberta; ask for rain.

LSP

Clown Mass & The Prancing Demon

Some clergypersons think that goofing off in a clown outfit will fill all those empty pews.

Perhaps they don't realize that clowns are sinister and frightening.

Satanism and witchcraft are on the rise in America.

Is there a correlation?

You be the judge, and in other news, Alex Jones has called Glenn Beck a "prancing demon." You can and should watch his epic rant of awesomeness here.

LSP

Don't be a Loser, Ride The Horse

It's been hard to ride lately on account of the floods but the waters have receded a bit, which means get on the horse. And that's what I did, after flying the flag at a cowboy church men's prayer breakfast. 

They're a good bunch of guys, the cowboys, with a pretty straight up kind of faith. Enlivened by that, I tacked up in the morning sunshine and rode out. Trace was eager enough and it was simply good to get out in the country on horseback. I find it clears the mind.

Gallop up The Hill

It's good exercise, too, provided you put some work into it, and we did, horse and rider, galloping along through the incredibly, for Texas, green countryside.

Ride over, I turned the herd out into their big pasture, where they can get up to mischief and eat lots of grass.

Trace

There's a satisfaction to all of this which is hard to put into words, but I will say this -- riding's good for mind, body and spirit. Unless you fall off and get killed, in which case it's a different story again.

With that in mind, stay on the horse,

LSP

The Vultures Are Circling

And not just over the Anglican Communion, they're going for The Old Harridan herself. Even the smuglib Huffpo gets it:

A Los Angeles Times article titled Clinton email probe enters new phase as FBI interviews loom highlights why Clinton’s campaign is stuck in political quicksand:

Federal prosecutors investigating the possible mishandling of classified materials on Hillary Clinton’s private email server have begun the process of setting up formal interviews with some of her longtime and closest aides, according to two people familiar with the probe, an indication that the inquiry is moving into its final phases.

Prosecutors also are expected to seek an interview with Clinton herself, though the timing remains unclear.

Yes, federal prosecutors will interview Hillary Clinton, in addition to her close associates.

At what point will establishment Democrats admit this fiasco is horrible for a general election?

Yes, federal prosecutors will interview Hillary Clinton. But here's Andrew Napolitano on the implications of that:

Perhaps she now recognizes how hard-pressed she will be to claim to the FBI or to a jury that she did not know that satellite photos of a North Korean nuclear facility or transcripts from wiretaps of Yemeni intelligence agents' cellphone calls or the itinerary of the late U.S. Ambassador to Libya Chris Stevens in the days before his murder or true names of American undercover intelligence agents — all of which were in her emails — were state secrets.

Perhaps she knows now that this is not a game.

Perhaps she does. Kick out the JAMS.

LSP

Ascension

Listen up, you lot. It's the Feast of the Ascension today so you'd better get to Mass. Here's a prayer, and none of your newfangled nonsense, either:

GRANT, we beseech thee, Almighty God, that like as we do believe thy only-begotten Son our Lord Jesus Christ to have ascended into the heavens; so we may also in heart and mind thither ascend, and with him continually dwell, who liveth and reigneth with thee and the Holy Ghost, one God, world without end. Amen.

It's also Cinco de Mayo and the commemoration of Mexico's great victory over the Frenchmen. I'd say that was cause enough for a double celebration.

God bless,

LSP

It's Bushcraft Wednesday!

So you're out there in the bush, using your craft, and you need an axe. In fact you need a battle tomahawk, but you can't climb into the Audi and run off to REI, or wherever, and buy one. That defeats the point, because Bushcraft is all about doing it yourself, without supermarkets, overpriced gear stores and Nanny State looking over your shoulder. So what do you do?

Forge a WAR-HAWK out of an old ball peen hammer. Here at the Compound, we're delighted to share this useful how-to video from Becker Forge.

Throw that Axe,

LSP

Bronze Age, Behold Your Chieftain

"So you have the water, you have the steaks... You have the wines and all of that."

Trump stormed through Indiana like a Bronze Age Chieftain, crushing Cruz by 16 percentage points in his landslide victory. Cruz has dropped out of the race and it's reported that Kasich will end his bid for the presidency today, leaving Trump the presumptive GOP nominee. But can the billionaire businessman beat Hillary?

If he loses it won't be for lack of opportunity. Hillary isn't liked, she doesn't resonate with people, there's an air of entitled, political insider-elite, smug dishonesty that hangs over her like a cloud. Even her own party isn't excited by Hillary and no wonder, there's no charism in her campaign, but there is plenty of strident, hectoring, shrill ambition. And then there's the scandals.

Clinton Foundation cash, Benghazi and the video set-up, Servergate and the missing emails, Whitewater, the Clinton body count and on and on. And she's under investigation by the FBI and facing a possible indictment. None of this makes Hillary look good, in fact it makes her look bad; the optics are dismal.

Now that Trump's seen off his GOP opposition he can start on Hillary, and like any Bronze Age Chieftain, it's a safe bet to say he thrives on red meat. There's no shortage of that in the form of the Democrat frontrunner's malfeasance, perceived or actual.

Of course she might be in prison before it's all said and done, which means a slugout with Bern.

Stay tuned,

LSP

The Worker's Friend

This is a 39 year old out of work coal miner, Bo Copely, asking Hillary Clinton how she was going to be his "friend":

"When you make comments like 'we're going to put a lot of coal miners out of jobs' these are the kind of people that you're affecting, this is my family. I just want to know how you can say you're going to put a lot of coal miners out of jobs, and then come in here and tell us how you're going to be our friend."

To which Hillary replied:

"I don't know how to explain it."

ZeroHedge puts it nicely, "We can't say we're surprised by any of this, as just like the financial elites that run everything, political elites also have realities that are significantly disconnected from everyone else."

Use pitchforks, torches, the FBI, whatever, but please, somehow, put the Harridan in jail.

Kick out the JAMS,

LSP

What's it to be Germany?

Europe, and Germany in particular, is presented with a choice. Do you want this?

Or do you want this?

Or is there a middle way, an Anglican via media, that runs through the House of War? History argues otherwise. That aside, I'd argue that the left would prefer Islam, such is their hatred of the Faith from which they were born.

Chesterton wrote about it in the Flying Inn, and while you reflect on that, ponder the Pentagram in the COEXIST logo.

Your Friend,

LSP

There's a Tranny in the Bathroom!

Presented without comment except to say, thank you, LL.

LSP

Church of England Godparents Liturgy. Happy May Day.

The venerable Cofe has come out with a new worship ritual for Godparents. Here's an excerpt from part of it, "Making Connections," which is a kind of confession. Pay attention to the "manual acts":

Sometimes we forget God who is with us every step of the way on our journey in life. Let’s say sorry to God for all those times and ask him to forgive us and help us. 

[Invite everyone to hold their hands open in front of them]
For all the times we have forgotten those who reach out to help us
Lord have mercy
All: Lord have mercy

[Look down at or touch feet]
For all the times we have not tried to follow Jesus
Christ have mercy
All: Christ have mercy

[Place hands over ears]
For all the times we have not listened to those who need us
Lord have mercy
All: Lord have mercy

I like "Look down at or touch feet," but that's just me. And that's not all, there's a Talk.

Talk about how hard is to learn or experience something new without any help. Having someone with you who is even a little ahead makes it more interesting, makes it easier, and makes it more enjoyable. Even better sometimes is a group exploring together. In the story from Acts the people of Macedonia wanted to discover more about Jesus. In those days they couldn’t just send a text – letters took weeks to arrive. So God intervened and a message came to Paul through a dream.. Come and help us. When we start to walk the journey of faith we need help too. And that’s where godparents come in – they can help us with all kinds of different things. They made big promises when we were baptized and over many years play a special part in our lives. Get people to read a few ideas from the Memory Wall.

What is this "Memory Wall"? Here's what you'll need:

Large sheets of paper eg lining paper on a roll or a large sheet with the heading “Memory Wall”; felt pens for directly writing on paper/fabric OR post-it notes and pins Four large cards each with one of these phrases: Being There; Part of the family; Good choices; Sharing faith; Yellow and white ribbons and two ‘prayer trees’ eg places where ribbons can be tied [optional] Heart shaped chocolates or carnations or godparent/godchild badges [available from www.churchprinthub.org] to give away [optional] Before the service: Place the paper or fabric somewhere accessible. As people arrive invite them to either write directly or use the post-it notes a memory of their godparent/godchild. If you are really organized you could begin this a couple of weeks before and also get people to bring along photos to create a ‘memory wall.’

It's suggested that this liturgical expression of infantilism is accompanied by music, whether "live or recorded." See above video and remember, it's all a larf until you wake up in a Wicker Man, and it's on fire.

Some Priestess Goofing Off

And in case you think I made all this up, think again.

Happy May Day,

LSP

The Church of England Found Snooping, in Wisconsin?

A Wisconsin man claims to have seen the Church of England snooping around his house in Monona, Dale County.

The anonymous Wisconsinite saw the Church from a reflection in his window. “It was in the reflection of the room," he said, "while my back was turned. It apparently sneaked from hiding to staircase. My father was asleep in a different room.”

By the time the man turned around the Church had gone, leaving "no trace." However, the Monona resident was able to describe the small denomination as being 4' tall, balding, with a small mouth and large alien-like eyes. The humanoid entity was reportedly wearing a "blue one-piece with no belt." 

However, some experts disagree. "I've seen the drawing and it's clearly not the Church of England," stated one pundit, "It looks a lot more like the Archbishop of Canterbury, Justin Welby. You can tell by its glasses, head and grey-like features. He might have been sneaking about for money or food."

Why the Church of England or its leader, Archbishop Welby, have been sneaking through houses in Wisconsin remains unknown.

Monona, Wisconsin, has a population of 8,000.

LSP

Elk Hunt Bear Wrangler

I was talking to a friend, I ride out at his ranch, and he started telling stories about being a guide on elk hunts in the Rockies.

They'd go in on horseback, set up camp in the mountains and then hunt for elk. My friend's job was to make sure the horses were all online. He liked it well enough because he loved horses and the wilderness, but sometimes they didn't just get elk, they got bears.

Millionaire Socialist Taken by a Bear

A bear would attack out of the forest and have to be shot, either you or the bear. When that happened, they'd clean the bear and put the skin on a pack horse. No easy thing, because the horses didn't like having a bearskin on them. The trick of it, apparently, was to get them used to the smell of the bear. And so they rode out, bear, elk and whatever else, through the mountains.

"I didn't know you were a bear wrangler, old chap," I remarked over a beaker of vintage port at the club. "Well I was," said my friend, sipping an ice tea because of his Baptist nature, "Yes indeed. Some of these boys that'd come out to shoot elk were from Dallas and not too fit. In fact they were pretty fat, which comes from sitting behind a desk all day and no exercise. And they'd get up there and have a heart attack. Honest to God, every year it's a deal, elk hunters getting a heart attack."

Chastened by reference to lack of exercise, I arranged for a ride next week and, to be honest, I'd like little better than a week or so's go at it in the Rockies. Bear and all.

Your Old Buddy,

LSP

There's a Peacock by the Woodpile

This small farming community managed, somehow, to survive last night's storm, and so did the neighbor's peacocks.

Last Night's Sheet Lightning

One of them was over by the woodpile when I got back from some church work this morning. It's one of two and perhaps before too long there'll be a serious peacock operation here. Lord knows, the town could use a growth industry.

Hope 'n Change didn't seem to make that happen and the Government's wondering why people aren't too happy about that. 

I mean to say, what's wrong with you? You may not have any money and there's no real jobs to speak of, but you can get a gay marriage and a sex-change while shopping at Target. 

C'mon, everybody, lighten up,

LSP

Another Storm

Thunder shakes the house as lightning sheets across the sky and rain lashes down; another storm. I watch the enraged fury of the elements from the comparative safety of the front porch. 

And such is the new normal, here in Texas. Storms, rain, flooding, the Eschaton. Speaking of which, here's an apocalyptic prophecy from Sr. Lucia, one of the Fatima children. She wrote to Cardinal Carlo Caffara of Bologna:

The final battle between the Lord and the reign of Satan will be about marriage and the family. Don’t be afraid, because anyone who operates for the sanctity of marriage and the family will always be contended and opposed in every way, because this is the decisive issue. However, Our Lady has already crushed its (Satan's) head.

The storm is intensifying. Whether and to what extent anything will be left of this bucolic farming community in the wake of the flood remains to be seen

LSP

Is Ted Cruz Satan?

Is Ted Cruz Satan?

Is John Boehner an Oompah Loompa shill for the New World Order?

LBJ buys pants.

That is all,

LSP

All Flame

From The Desert Fathers:

Abba Lot went to see Abba Joseph and said to him: Abba, as much as I am able I practice a small rule, a little fasting, some prayer and meditation, and remain quiet and as much as possible I keep my thoughts clean. What else should I do? Then the old man stood up and stretched his hands toward heaven, and his fingers became like ten torches of flame and he said to him: If you wish, you can become all flame.

Thanks, GWB, for the reminder. I won't comment, except to say that you'll notice that Joseph doesn't recommend a balance of hot and cold, fire and non-fire, or good and evil. Rather, Lot can become all flame, but he has to wish it. That, just in itself, is no small thing.

God bless,

LSP

It's Bushcraft Wednesday!

Bushcraft is a skill, the skill of living and surviving in the wild, and part of that means hunting for your food. But sometimes the hunter becomes the hunted.

With that in mind, Team LSP is pleased to present this infovideo as a cautionary tale. We hope you find it useful.

Be prepared,

LSP