NASA To Announce Alien Life

Thanks to the hacker group, Anonymous, we know that US space agency, NASA, is on the verge of announcing what we've all known all along, that alien lifeforms exist.

The space aliens resemble human beings but have no soul and a different concept of "truth", which causes them to lie.

Evidence suggests that the off-world creatures have no fixed gender and can change their sex at will. Others appear to be sexless but addicted to power and money.

DNC operatives and media executives at MSNBC and CNN were quick to denounce the hacking as yet another example of Kremlin interference in the US democratic process.

Have the Russians hacked NASA and if so, should we thank Putin for revealing the truth?

Your Old Friend,

LSP

California Bans Travel To Texas!

California has banned its civil servants from state-funded travel to Texas because the Lone Star State "discriminates."

Such tragedy. Who knows, perhaps the Rainbow State will ban all its citizens from visiting Texas.

Shoot straight,

LSP

Driven Insane

Pop legend superstar, Miley Cyrus, claims she's a genderless spirit who's no different than an animal. And I don't want to seem beastly or somehow dogmatic but I put it to you that there are good spirits and bad spirits.

In related news, a pregnant woman, Kaci Sullivan, insists she's a man. To be fair, Kaci doesn't look much like a woman although, like many women, she does “love seeing my baby grow inside of me.”

As a great philosopher once wrote, those whom the Gods would destroy, they first drive insane.

Make of that what you will.

Your Friend,

LSP

Cooking With LSP?

Can you cook with LSP? That's a very good question and I thought I'd put it to the test with some Country Style Ribs. More chops than ribs but whatever, they're cheap. Then I noticed that we'd all been here before.

Perhaps, I thought, the addition of a Glock 21 would change things up enough to warrant a separate post. Would the pistol improve the recipe? Yes, like Deep State Mueller adding to the WaPo's hoax machine, the Glock helped.

As I browned off the chops, deglazed the onion, garlic, celery, carrot, tomato paste, bay leaf base with apple cider vinegar, then yes, for sure, the Glock helped. Everything felt more secure, this was going to work.

Then, when the house smelled of the delicious aroma of simmering pork and the time came to add this awesomness to a plate of mashed potato, did the Glock win out? Yes, it did, because these Country Style Ribs were better than ever and twice as good.

Moral of the story? Cook with a pistol, maybe a Glock, your call, there's no "rule."

Weapons sorted, eat your scoff like a warrior. And that's cooking, with...

LSP

The Saint Michael's Conference, 2017

Normally I'd be on the staff of the St. Michael's Conference for young people right now, overseeing the liturgical dance, teaching a couple of classes and leading discussion groups on UFOs, Cryptids and Why You Shouldn't Be A Thieving Hippy. But this year I took a break and sent a cadet instead. "I don't want to cramp your style," I told my son.

Still, I miss the event. It's an outstanding, immersive course in traditional catholicism as seen through an Anglican lens. Something like an Anglo-Catholic boot camp perhaps, and a lot of fun for the kids who don't seem to miss guitar playing nuns, wymin priests and all the other skulduggery of unpopular modern worship and watered down belief.  

At the Conference the staff don't peddle that, they do worship and teach according to the Faith which has been handed down to us by Christ through the Apostles. 

There is great, Spirit-filled converting power in this and in the end, when the ersatz versions of Christianity have run their course, it's this Faith which will be left standing against the gates of Hell.

Those, says Christ, won't prevail.

God bless,

LSP 

Solstice!

Yes, you got that right, it's the Solstice, the longest day of the year, a day when hippies come out to play and sing. 

In England that means dusting off the antlers, putting on your unicorn mask and heading off to The Stones for mysticke revelry. 

Keep it Clean, Hippies

If you're a top-level hippy, you can even dress up like a druid wizard. All good, harmless fun, eh?

Face Painting

Sure it is, until you wake up from a crazed body painting session and discover someone's ripped off your giro, leaving you possessed by a Special Brew demon.

The Magic Of The Stones

Here at the Compound we're not marking the Solstice by travelling to Austin's famous fiberglass stone circle, much less its superior English forbear, heck, we didn't even make it to Burning Man. But we are saying this.

Hose Them Down

If you meet the hippy on the road, hose it down, AR15 optional.

Love and Peace,

LSP

Laughing My #Ossoff

Have you noticed how libs are so very sure of themselves, how they're so smugly settled science on the right side of history and anyone who disagrees with them is really kind of stupid? 

Like, you ignorant farmer, don't you understand that paying higher taxes and getting rid of national borders is going to make you richer and our country stronger? I mean to say, how dumb can you get, flyover people. And no, you're not invited to our Chappaqua dinner party.

Loser

Leaving aside the insanity, there's an overweening pride in this spirit of condescension that matastasizes into hubris. We saw this in the last election; Hillary was so obviously, so without doubt going to win that even the thought of standing against her was laughable. Then she lost and lost hard.

Same again in Montana. Trump was so self-evidently wrong that the Democrats had to win, such a no-brainer, right? Except that it wasn't and the Democrats were body-slammed, despite a Guardian reporter whining about her glasses getting broken. But that was Montana, where all the fascist ranchers live, so maybe the race wasn't fair from the get-go. Next time, in Georgia, it'd be different.

Now We're Going To Win!

Georgia's 6th District was going to be a turning point, an oh so clear-cut referendum on the evil stupidity of the Trump Administration. Just to make sure voters went with the who-could-ever-doubt-it, right in every way Democrats, millionaire socialists poured $24 million into Ossoff's campaign, making it the most expensive congressional race in history. They had to win, Ossoff was going to be the Trump Slayer.

A Typical Rich Socialist 

Then he lost. Who knows, perhaps people don't like being condescended to by bi-coastal elite millionaire socialists. Perhaps they're ignorant enough to think that having a border makes sense if you're going to have a country and that paying less tax puts more money in your pocket. 

Who knows, maybe the people of Georgia are so invincibly, stupidly racist that they think transgender bathrooms aren't the burning civil rights issue of our time. It's all a great $24 million mystery.

In the meanwhile, I'm with "sewer rat barbie," Kellyanne Conway.

Laughing my #Ossoff.

LSP

Brussels Train Jihad

The world stands by in mute wonderment as yet another member of the Religion of Peace goes full Jihad and tries to murder men, women and children by blowing himself up, this time in a crowded train station.

What drove this man to blow himself up in Brussels' central station? Was it Islamophobia, Climate Change, the secular materialism of the West which paid him welfare? Surely it couldn't have been anything to do with, you know, Islam, because that's so peaceful. 

Tell that tired old lie to the people Mohammed slaughtered and enslaved but you can't, they've been dead for centuries. His cult, on the other hand, is alive and well and doing what it's always done; looks like Brussels got lucky this time. Maybe next time it won't.

In the meanwhile, I present you with this powerful infovideo of a train.

Armored battle trains aside, how should we deal with the Jihad? Some security experts recommend state sponsored DrawMo competitions. Then, when the head-chopping savages turn up to emulate their head-chopping founder, they'll find designated marksmen waiting for them. 

Problem? Solution.

LSP

The Cooling Hand Of God

Keen-eyed readers of this family oriented mind blog will know that Russian agents masquerading as climate activists hacked the Compound's HVAC, just when the Weather climbed to triple digit intensity. Disaster? Yes.

Getting Hot at The Compound

"LSP, if that's your real name, which I'm beginning to doubt," stated one expiring art philosopher, "Sort. It. Out." Fully aware of the gravity of the situation, I got on the 'phone to a church elder.

"The AC's down and the mission's looking shaky."

"What do you want me to do?"

"Pray, pray hard that the unit returns to life."

"I'm on it."

Blue HVAC

Within 30 minutes the prayer was answered, malware removed and cool, refreshing air circulating through the house. Thank God.

A Typical Buenos Aires Club Scene

In other religious news, evidence has emerged that Pope Francis worked as a Buenos Aires bouncer. Whether Archbishop Justsin Welby, leader of the Worldwide Anglican Non Communion (WANC) was "on the list" is presently undetermined.

Stay tuned,

LSP

Utter Disaster

It's Texas and there's a "weather advisory" in place, warning people to be careful because of the extreme, searing heat. People are frying steak and eggs on sidewalks and the tailgates of their rigs, it's that hot. So it's a good thing we've got air conditioning, right?

No, wrong, because we don't. It's broken. The Russians got in and hacked the unit and now it doesn't work. Or maybe it wasn't the Russians, perhaps it was a roving crew of Climate Activists out of Austin, taking revenge on the team for not paying the Weather Tax. Who knows? But this much is certain.

No air conditioning at the Compound = total, unmitigated, utter disaster.

As you were,

LSP

A Tale Of Two Nothings

It's been wild, it's been a white-knuckle, thrill-powered ride of Cold War brinksmanship unparalleled since the hunt for Red October itself. Yes, we're talking about Putin, head of SPECTRE and KAOS overthrowing our great democracy through the agency of his spy, Trump, and his satrap lackey, Sessions. 

Espionage subversion on a par with the Bourne Supremacy that overthrew our rightful ruler, Hillary, in her bid for power.

The only problem with this tissue of lies that's been peddled by our lying, mendacious, corrupt, elite, venal mainstream media and their Democrat masters is that there isn't any proof. Not a shred of evidence.

You're Fired

Onetime FBI supremo, Comey, was going to blow the lid off of the vile conspiracy with his damning testimony. And... he didn't, except to say that he'd told the infamous Russian spy, Trump, that he wasn't under investigation. On three occasions, no less.

Perfidious Putinite 

Then there's the perfidious Sessions, who testified today before the Senate Intelligence Committee. Surely the keen-eyed lawmakers on the investigating panel, such as John McCain, would unmask Putin's diminutive puppet.

No. Didn't happen. Nothing. No evidence for the Kremlin's epic success in bringing down Hillary's ill-fated campaign through hacking DNC emails and revealing the corrupt workings of The Party to the public via Wikileaks.

Here in the Compound's fast-paced, high-energy newsroom we're disappointed. We were hoping for a story  and all we got was a tale of two nothings, yet more testimony revealing exactly nothing about Trump's collusion with the evil Kremlin.

Maybe that's because there wasn't any.

Stand by the JAMS.

LSP

ISIS Laughs While Britain Sleeps?

The fanatical Muslim savages who went on a knife Jihad the other day were apparently known to the police, one of them even appeared on a BBC jihadimentary. But nothing was done and now people are terrorized and dead.

Also, strangely, it seems that Muslims who leave Britain to go on Holy War in Syria are free to return to the U.K., where they're left in peace to plot further Mohammedan mayhem. How many of these head-chopping maniacs are there? No one seems to know, some place the figure at 850.

Well that's alright then. A mere 800 or so crazed Muslims who fought for ISIS are alive and well and building up a head of murderous steam in the United Kingdom. What happens when they decide to go Allah and cook-off? More candlelit vigils, John Lennon songs and people dead, obviously.

Then there's the 3000 Muslims of "special interest" and a further 20,000 Muslims of "some interest," interest being the intent to kill, murder, maim and terrorize the people they hate, namely anyone that isn't part of their brand of pure Islam.

A Jackass

So what's the response, how to deal with the threat? Well that's easy, first you tell yourself it isn't a threat, then you remind the world that it's nothing to do with Islam as you chalk up a peace sign while laying flowers on a coexist placard, all to the tune of Imagine. And then you convert to Islam.

Or, and this is a solution favored by veteran members of the intelligence community, you hold DrawMo (Draw Mohammed) competitions across the country. When the Jihad inevitably arrives you shoot them. Problem? Solution.

On the other hand, simply removing the known "special interest" group with special expedition might work too, to say nothing of those 20,000 "some interest" jihadis-in-potential.

Perhaps that sounds callous but consider the alternative. A massive backlash against all Muslims regardless, and devil take the hindmost. Europe's proven itself more than capable of that course of action and it grows closer with every Islamic outrage that's perpetrated under the gaze of Lennonist muticulturalism.

Remember this, too. Pretty much everything the progressive left proposes, produces the exact opposite of its intended result. 

Apply that to the calculus of candlelit vigils, John Lennon and Jihad. But in the meanwhile...

ISIS laughs,

LSP