New Years Eve Ice Age Eschaton

Thanks a lot, so-called General "Flynn," if that's your real name, which we doubt. Thanks to you and the Russians we're entering a new Ice Age and no, this isn't Oymyakon, it's rural Texas and there's ice on the rig.

In fact there's snow, drifting wildly against Blue Icebreaker's leash on the front office porch. I know, it's badly in need of paint and that should have happened by now; who knows, maybe it'll all be over by Spring. In the meanwhile, c'mon, Lupe, finish the job.

Ice, paint and snow aside, there's a roast in the oven and Yorkshire Pudding batter chilling in the fridge. Our plan is to eat like warriors. But in the meanwhile, where's that good old Global Warming?

Have a blessed and happy New Year.

Rave on,

LSP

Farmers Markets? Pack Up And Go, Racists

Just when you thought it was safe to buy some farm fresh tomatoes, free of the chains of Big Food, you're brought up short. You see, farmers markets are racist. We know this thanks to two San Diego State University profs.

Farmers markets, say the brainy professors, are "white spaces where the food consumption habits of white people are normalized.”

See? You thought you were simply buying fruit and veg in an effort to bypass the massive food conglomerates and encourage local produce. But no, you were just encouraging "whiteness." You can check out the San Diego buffoons on Campus Reform.

While you're at it, don't forget the ivory towers of Brown and its latest fauxcahontas initiative. Race, readers, is as fluid as gender itself. Just ask Rachel Dolezal or, for that matter, the curiously named Brown.

From left to right, Rachel Dolezal, Rachel Dolezal

It costs somewhere in the region of $67k a year to attend Brown. Rachel Dolezal, who is white but became brown, didn't go to school there, oddly. 

Make of that what you will,

LSP

Fire It Up

There's the fender, the "dogs" and the ancient fire tools from the time your ancestors conquered this land, or bought them in a street market in Brussels or Oklahoma City or wherever; doesn't matter, dammit. Where's the fire?!?

I've argued this for years, "Clean out the flu, light the fire; it'll be better, warmer." But no, a feeble gaslight rules.

Now that we've had a year of MAGA this should and must change. Real fires, please.

America First,

LSP

Kwanzaa And The Holy Innocents

I know, I know, you're all getting down with ahem, "Dr." Karenga's awesomely made up Kwanzaa, which some argue isn't celebrated by anyone other than white liberals and perhaps the FBI. But spare a thought for the Holy Innocents while you're at it.

Here's the Collect of the day and another for the Octave.

O God, Whose praise the martyred innocents did this day proclaim, not by speaking, but by dying, do to death in us all the malice of sinfulness, that our lives may also proclaim Thy faith, which our tongues profess. Through our Lord Jesus Christ, Thy Son, Who liveth and reigneth with Thee. in the unity of the Holy Ghost, God, world without end.

Grant, we beseech Thee, almighty God, that the new birth of Thine only-begotten Son in the flesh may set us free, who are held by the old bondage under the yoke of sin. Through the same Lord Jesus Christ Thy Son, Who liveth and reigneth with Thee in the unity of the Holy Ghost, God, world without end.

And for all you trads out there, here's the Latin.

Deus, cujus hodiérna die præcónium Innocentes Mártyres non loquéndo, sed moriéndo conféssi sunt: ómnia in nobis vitiórum mala mortífica; ut fidem tuam, quam lingua nostra lóquitur, étiam móribus vita fateátur. Per Dominum nostrum Jesum Christum Filium Tuum: Qui Tecum vivit et regnat in unitate Spiritus Sancti, Deus, Per omnia saecula saeculorum.

Concede, quaesumus, omnipotens Deus: ut nos Unigeniti Tui nova per carnem nativitas liberet; Quos sub peccati jugo vetustat servitus tenet. Per eúmdem Dóminum nostrum Jesum Christum Fílium tuum, qui tecum vivit et regnat in unitáte Spíritus Sancti, Deus, Per omnia saecula saeculorum.

Serious stuff, right? And now we can all get back to innocently enjoying Kwanzaa.

Kawaida,

LSP

Boxing Day MAGA

Have you noticed how much better Christmas was this year, as though a cloud of MillSoc (Millionaire Socialist) oppression had lifted from the land? We certainly did here in the Metrosprawl; no complaints.

The kids, who won't be kids much longer, woke up to stockings that included micro drones and almost fell over themselves with excitement. Thanks, LL, for the inspiration. Then we drove to Dallas to celebrate with the rest of the family.

I got a MAGA ornament to go with the PSG (Presidiential Snow Globe), which was pretty uplifting and some neat unicorn paraphernalia. Be magical, it tells us. Hard not too with America's popular and glamorous First Lady in the White House. Seriously, think of the alternative.

Nasty, right?  Unlike the neat boxing robots I got the kids. Perhaps you remember them from the '70s, Rock 'Em Sock 'Em; who knew these fighting 'bots were still being made. Perhaps they weren't and now they are, thanks to tax reform and putting America first.

'

With that in mind, all the best for the Feast of St. Stephen and as always, MAGA.

Happy Boxing Day,

LSP

Melania Mondays! Christmas Special

Christmas, Monday, Melania. All of these words fit together which is why we're delighted to bring you a Melania Mondays! Christmas special. 

America's popular and glamorous First Lady is a devout Catholic but went ecumenical last night by attending an Episcopal church for Midnight Mass, Bethesda-by-the-Sea. The Rector, a former Navy Chaplain, preached about Nelson Mandela.

Undaunted by the sermon, the congregation gave Melania and her husband a standing ovation and who can blame them? The presidential couple are all about giving everyone a Merry Christmas instead of the miserable NWO "Happy Holidays."

After the service, Melania returned to Mar-a-Lago, which serves as a "Winter Whitehouse," where she spoke to children on the phone who'd called NORAD to locate Santa Claus. Melania is well known for her love of children.

Speaking at a Toys for Tots event at Joint Base Anacostia-Bolling earlier this year, Melania said, "It is my hope that during this holiday season, people will remember it is not about gifts - it is about family, service and gratitude. We must continue to look out for, and help each other.”

Thank you, First Lady, for looking out for our country and doing your part to make America great again. MAGA.

Merry Christmas!

LSP

Merry Christmas! And guess what, tomorrow's Melania Mondays! It just keeps on getting better and better.

Wishing you all a joyous Christmas,

LSP

Let It Snow

One of the best things about getting ready for Christmas is the Presidential Snow Globe, featuring Donald Trump in winning regalia. Shake the globe and let it snow.

It works well in the Kitchen

Next to a chunk of Steuben

On the dining room table

The top of a prayer book

Or Garden & Gun.

So let it snow, let it snow, let it snow.

MAGA,

LSP

All Lit Up And Ready To Go

Dallas HQ looks good, all lit up and ready to go. Saying that, the tree was bought at the last minute and needed some attention. Still, it glitters like Christmas should and its ornaments shine back at you like old friends. Beautiful.

Buying last minute presents in the metrosprawl in near freezing rain was less beautiful but Half Price Books came in handy. You're not allowed to carry a gun in Half Price, leaving you rather less than half safe; fortunately no one was shot by an outraged anti-Christmas Muslim while I was there. 

The Game Stop allowed concealed carry, I think, which is perhaps unwise. Think of all the gun toting parents getting ready to unload on hideously overpriced gaming consoles, the games themselves, controllers, add-ons and the whole nine yards of the very expensive, destructive to young minds gaming industry. Anyway.

Back at the urban compound all was well and the light shineth in darkness. What do I want for Christmas? A good double, a ranch and the unity of Christendom.

Light it up,

LSP

OPERATION SNOWFLAKE -- EXCLUSIVE

Students at a technical/trade school are striking a blow against the cultural Marxist, PC stranglehold on their "Libisota" campus by launching Operation Snowflake.

Taking their theme from the popular 4Chan campaign, It's OK to be white, Operation Snowflake posters advertise the slogans "IT'S OK TO BE WHITE," "IT'S OK TO BE ASIAN," IT"S OK TO BE BROWN," "IT'S OK TO BE BLACK." 

Printed off-campus, the posters are placed in strategic positions in the school. According to Swanky, a 52 year old Machine Tool Technology student and MAGA Knight, the posters are a "social experiment."

"I want to track where each poster is and track which ones are ripped down. It's just a social experiment, designed to melt snowflakes."

The group of disaffected machinists went into action after discovering safe spaces at the school, featuring coloring books and cuddly dogs.

"This is what higher education has come to," stated Swanky, "Coloring books and a petting zoo. I go to a tech/trade school and thought it was the last stand against Social Justice Warrior culture. I was wrong. The 'It's OK to be white' posters will be ripped down and reported, I guarantee it."

Operation Snowflake is a grass roots movement, gaining traction across the Midwest and beyond. 

Operation Snowflake cadres describe themselves as MAGA Knights and carry self-forged hammers made of US Steel.

Stay tuned,

LSP

Tax Cut MAGA

Sit yourself down, pour a drink and ponder this conundrum. What makes you richer, paying more money to the government or less? Tricky, right?

Feed The Beast

No. Not tricky. And well done Mr. President, for cutting that particular Gordian Knot of millionaire socialist elite, globalist cronyism. Good work, more money in people's pockets and a gesture, at least, towards smaller government. Towards cutting off the money that feeds the Beast.

Do The Math, Mitch

Also, let the reader understand, our old enemy the Weather's been taken off the list of threats to national security. And with it, presumably, all kinds of lucrative contracts and NWO, millionaire socialist elite cronyism. 

Oh dear, what a shame. America's going to use its massive natural resource to achieve ANWR energy independence and wealth for its citizens. Sorry, open borders, NWO Spirit Cookers.

Wonk

With that in mind, note how the skunk traitor GOP has decided to rally around DJT. Never Trump? Forever Trump. Whatever, drill, drill, drill and remember, you'll be poorer now because you pay less tax.

ANWR,

LSP

Lord Of Light

"Is there a problem with the jukebox?"

"No, it's Hawkwind."

Normally the Compound isn't decorated for Christmas because all of the energy goes into Dallas HQ but this year's different because there's a rumour of children. So I slung up some lights to get the team in the mood for our Lord's birthday.

Typical Ladbroke Grove Street Scene

It was appreciated, "That looks really good, dad!" Well, just wait 'til you delve deep into the stocking and find a lump of anthracite. "Hey, Merry Christmas. And here's some boot polish, these sturdy brogues aren't going to clean themselves!"

Let's Have This Back

In other news, a church in Kingston on Thames is busy celebrating the birth of Mohammad for Advent and the Diocese of London has elected some Judy as its bishop figure.

Some Kind of Joke?

Good call, CofE, you took the wrong step years ago.

Rock on,

LSP