Madonna, Illuminati Witch

Fabled pop icon, Madonna, has claimed that celebrity New World Order libs, like Oprah, aren't members of her secret occultist group, the Illuminati.

Of course.

They're not occultists.

Not for a minute.

Unlike Madonna, who is a well-known witch. Here's what she has to say in her new album:

"Teach me how to pray, and we can do drugs, and we can smoke weed, and we can drink whiskey. 'Yeah we can get high, and we can get stoned, and we can sniff glue, and we can do E, and we can drop acid," sings Madonna on her track 'Make the Devil Pray.'"

The Vatican is calling for more Exorcists. For obvious reasons.

Nice grill, Madonna. Vade Retro Satana,

LSP

Dog #2

This dog hates celebrity socialist millionaires and their progleft, Illuminati friends. He hates wimmin bishops, too.

Obviously,

LSP

Dog

I wasn't looking for a dog. Don't get me wrong, I'm not a comsymp dog-hater, I just wasn't looking to get one. But Blue Eschaton thought otherwise. He turned up on the porch and didn't leave; I fed him, perhaps that helped.

The rest is history. I doctored him up and took him to the range, where he hasn't died yet, despite jumping up to catch the bullets. And now he's here; some think he's making his way to Californy, others think he's staying in Texas, where it's safe.

One thing's for sure. Blue Apocalypse loves Christmas, no doubt about it. He even snarls at people who say "Happy Holidays."

I like all of this.

LSP

Putin is Golden, Libby's Not So Hot

Russian strongman, Vladimir Putin, is dumping US Treasuries and buying gold. In the meanwhile, what's been described as "Obama's brilliant strategy to cripple Putin" is in shreds, with the trillion dollar leveraged US shale industry tanking and blood on the streets of Aberdeen, as the UK's oil industry goes Defcon.

So what's up with that? As one commentator put it:

"I'm stacking ammo. Your gold had better be hidden well because all you need to do is read any paper around the globe to know that when the thin veneer of civilization comes off, it's going to get ugly quickly."

Ugly? Quickly? If England's new Boy Bishop and her celebrity millionaire socialist buddy, Desmond Tutu, is anything to go by, we're already there. But please, please, stop hoarding .22LR.

Some of us want to plink.

LSP

Yippee.

There's been around 2000 years of Christian thinking, encompassing some of the greatest minds the world has seen. It's a long list. Then there's Desmond Tutu. Here's what he had to say about women bishops in the Church of England.

Yippee

"Wonderful that you over there will soon have women bishops," wrote Tutu to the Archbishop of York, "Yippee! I know you have pushed for this for a long time. Yippee again!"

Yippee. So it's come to that. After two millennia of Christian thought we arrive at the Nobel Laureate genius of Archbishop Desmond Tutu, celebrity millionaire socialist.

Celebrity Millionaire Socialist

Rumors that Tutu's an apostate, paid-off, NWO mountebank are entirely without the Desmond Tutu foundation.

Grinning All The Way To The Bank

Tutu's speaking fees are available on request.

LSP

Is Putin Still Awesome?

As the cold war of words with Russia turns into a hot financial war, readers have asked if this blog will continue its pro-Putin stance. Good question. Some argue that Russia's strongman is the reincarnation of St. Paul, which is a bold call and I'd hesitate to go that far. 

However, the former KGB Colonel did lock up Pussy Riot. A big plus. He also stands against the USEURO Axis of Gayness. Another big plus, and he's the only major world leader that dares to publicly support Christianity. Some say that's cynical on Putin's part and I don't care if it is. He supports the church and that's good, in my book, regardless of motive. 

But Putin isn't just against the limo-lib, atheist gay agenda, he's also against big taxation. Under his leadership, Russia has a flat tax of 13%; another plus. And let's be honest, he's not a feminized, metrosexual, pink panderer to the progleft's attempt to deconstruct humanity and remake it in the image of Aleister Crowley, Margaret Sanger, or some other Satan. No, Russia's leader shoots, rides, fishes, hunts and loves getting out in the field. He loves his country too.

Here's what he had to say about the current attacks on his Motherland: 

"Maybe our bear should sit quietly, not chasing any piglets around, but just eating honey and berries. Maybe they should just leave him alone? They will not. They are trying to put it on a chain. And as soon as they do it they will tear his teeth and claws out."

I'd say Putin has a point, but would he mistake Obama for a waiter at a dinner party? Who knows. Is he the New Constantine? Perhaps. Is he still awesome? Not if you're Pussy Riot or a libleft pansexualist, obviously. If you're a pro-Christian, small taxation, trad values sportsman, probably yes, he is still awesome. And is it wise for the West and our Mohammedan allies, like Qatar and Saudi Arabia, to fight against Russia?

Memories are short and getting shorter by the day, but let's not forget what attacking Russia did to the Bonapartists and Hitlerites.

No favors at all.

LSP

Pistols at Noon

My philisophical pal, GWB, swung by for a workout on his new Sig and some evening fun. We pooled dove breasts and I cooked up a couple of rabbits that were burning a hole in the freezer. 

Red wine and mushroom stew for the bunnies (they were a bit tough, but the sauce was good) and jalapeno popper-style for the dove. I cleverly managed to avoid breaking one of my few remaining teeth on a bit of shot and all in all, great fun.

Aquinas

After Morning Prayer it was time to go down to the range with dogs and break out some pistols against a couple of silhouettes and steel plates. GWB shot well with his Sig 2022 .9mm, and I had fun with a .38 Special and a .45. Note to self: remember to aim and breathe.

Bonaventure

The dogs had fun too, enjoying themselves chasing around. Blue Deathwish got progressively excited by the pistol fire and would jump up in the air after each shot, as if to catch the bullet. Not-so-smart dog. 

Wittgenstein

And just for fun, I tested out my .17HMR against a small pumpkin and its miniature allies.

Bertrand Russell

The .17HMR is devastating against a small pumpkin. 

In case you wondered.

Keep squeezing the trigger,

LSP

America Scorns Obamas

As hope and change turns to despair and decline for ordinary Americans, the country's First Couple have reported a spate of hostile encounters with the general public.

During one PR trip to Target, Michelle Obama described being disrespected by a shopper, even though she is the First Lady of the most powerful country in the world.

"I tell this story – I mean, even as the first lady – during that wonderfully publicized trip I took to Target, not highly disguised, the only person who came up to me in the store was a woman who asked me to help her take something off a shelf," stated Michelle Obama, who is 5'11".

Michelle also described how her husband, who has had a disastrous slump in popularity, is often mistaken as a waiter. "He was wearing a tuxedo at a black-tie dinner, and somebody asked him to get coffee," Michelle told People magazine. President Obama also told the magazine how he is treated as a valet, after coming out of restaurants.

Chowing Down

Reuters reports that President Obama's approval rating with the public stands at a dismal 37% and according to Pew data, median wealth for lower income American households is less now than it was in the 1980s, dropping from $11,400 in 1983 to $9,300 last year.

There's change we can believe in and well done, millionaire, limo-lib socialists. Rumors that the Obamas drive their own cars or take things down from shelves, themselves, are entirely without foundation. Obviously.

Cheers,

LSP

Church of England Elects First Boy Bishop Since the Middle Ages!

In a surprise move, the Church of England has elected its first Boy Bishop since the Middle Ages.

Rev. Libby Lane, who was a priestess in the Diocese of Chester, has been named as the new Boy Bishop of Stockport, in greater Manchester. After the surprise announcement, the new Boy Bishop said, "So today I pray will not be simply about one woman called up a new ministry in the church but much more than that, an opportunity to acknowledge all that has gone before and to look ahead to what is still to be done."

What beautiful thoughts, Libby!

The Episcopal Church has had Boy Bishops for years.

Good luck, CofE.

LSP

Church of England Infographic

Presented without comment.

LSP

Church of England Talent Pool, Caught on Camera?

The Church of England's elusive Talent Pool may have been caught on camera, running through Victorian sewers beneath Merseyside.

Filmed by engineers, the mysterious creature has long back legs and glowing eyes. Paranormal experts speculate that the pipe prowling Talent Pool has been feeding off fat deposits and waste water. 

Taken by surprise at the unexpected sighting, cameraman Ian Appleton stated, “I physically jumped when I saw the Talent Pool."

Others aren't convinced, claiming that the Talent Pool was just a hoax staged by United Utilities, as part of the water company's What To Flush marketing campaign which uses school visits, advertising and PR stunts to encourage customers to think before they flush.

Is the frightening creature filmed in Liverpool's sewers the CofE's fast-track to promotion, or yet another MBA inspired sales drive to reverse the declining denomination's fortunes?

You, the reader, be the judge.

LSP

Atheist Santa

"Dear Santa," writes the smirking atheist girl to her imaginary friend, "All I want for Christmas is to skip church." The substantial little disbeliever then goes on to explain herself. She's too old, apparently, "to believe in fairy tales."

Why does she believe in Santa, then? 

Maybe she wants to have her cake and eat it too, but speaking of fairy tales,

Happy Kwanzaa,

LSP