You Sad Loser!

I went to Best Buy today, just to check things out and see what pop-tech was up to. I walked away feeling like a sad loser because:

A) I don't have a phone with a "6" after it's name.

B) My laptop isn't a touchscreen with at least 8 MB of RAM and a 1TB hard drive.

C) I don't own a wireless home-wide sound system that can stream music to any room in my house at the touch of a smartscreen.

Remember, everyone, you must buy moar, much moar, then you'll be happy. Repeat that enough and you never know, it might even come true.

On the other hand, you might decide that God and the demon Mammon are incompatible. The same thing goes for Lamashtu as well, but maybe that's a different story.

Kick out the jams,

LSP

Rainbow Nazis

Via The Fact Compiler.

You. Must. Obey. 

Vicious rumours that Team LSP celebrated Queen Victoria Day by a visit to the pub, are entirely without foundation.

LSP

Happy Victoria Day!

Today I invite you to take a break from life's vicissitudes and have a holiday, because today is Victoria Day!

Typical Victoria Day Celebration

That's right, today we stand with our friends in Canada and celebrate Queen Victoria's birthday, a few days early to be accurate, but who cares?

Canada

So have some fun, turn off Steffie-the-Hobbit, don't get into any scraps with roving gangs of outlaw bikers, maybe take a break from compulsively reading the bad news which sweeps over us like an arching tidal wave. Whatever it takes.

Calgary

I might go on a Cell Phone Jihad, in which participants shoot up their old cell phones with high power rifles. Or I might not.

There's no rule. On Victoria Day.

LSP

Well Done, Napoleon

Well done, Obama, you latter-day Napoleon.

Ramadi, capitol of Iraq's Anbar province, which borders Saudi Arabia and isn't even remotely strategic to anyone who lives in opposite land, has been overrun by ISIS savages.

As I understand it, 1,300 US soldiers and Marines died, fighting for Ramadi. All for what? So ISIS can rule there? Well why not, it's not like there's going to be an Apple Store there any time soon, or a Walmart outlet, or anything gay like that. I mean to say, there's no likelihood of a Pride rally being held in Ramadi, so why bother defending it. 

In the meanwhile, the same Muslims who enslave and rape women, and behead children, are in control of Iraq's western province.

Good work, Obama, you Rainbow Rommel.

We scorn you.

LSP

Waco Biker Shootout

Rival gangs of Outlaws clashed in Waco this evening in a shootout that left 9 bikers dead and 18 injured.

The fight occurred at the Twin Peaks restaurant, where fighting started in a restroom, then spilled over into the bar and parking lot, escalating from fists and chains to gunfire.

Police were present at the scene, with one officer, Patrick Swanton, stating, “In 34 years of law enforcement, this is the most violent crime scene I have ever been involved in. There is blood everywhere. We will probably approach the number of 100 weapons.”

According to Swanton, bikers began shooting at police, “This is one of the worst gun fights we’ve ever had in the city limits. They started shooting at our officers.”

No police or onlookers were injured (thank God). The fight centered on the Cossacks and Bandidos gangs, neither of whom are known as charitable organizations.

I drive by that restaurant quite a lot, on my way to visit the sick, or Cabela's. 

Be safe,

LSP

Behold The Hobbit

George Stephanopoulos is known around the world as a Hobbit who masquerades as an investigative journalist with a passionate love of tough, reasoned reporting, reporting that's all about uncovering the truth. Except when it comes to the Clintons.

That's because the Hobbit loves the wealthy Clintons so much that he gave three annual checks of $25,000 to the Clinton Foundation.

Dark Hobbit

And it's not just about money for the famous show-biz Hobbit, it's about time, too. That's why the small but rich celebrity spends so much it with the Clinton Global Initiative, on panels, giving prizes, sometimes simply attending, and entertaining all the millionaire socialists with its cute little hobbit tricks.

Goofy Hobbit

Tricks? You know, like failing to tell its viewers of all the support its given the Clintons over the years while pretending to be a fact-finding journalist.

Short Hobbit

Maybe the dismally tanking ABC will rid itself of its Hobbit liability, and the financially secure but truth-challenged little beast can trundle off to Mordor with Piers Morgan, in search of something precious, like a Hillary Presidency.

One Foundation To Rule Them All

Because as everyone knows, the Hobbit is all about Clinton Cash, not the news.

Dachas in Martha's Vineyard all 'round!

LSP

Drone Strike!

It was a pretty normal afternoon, here in this slice of rural paradise. Just me and the dog, Blue UAV, walking around town, taking in the sights, flying the flag.

Then, somehow, I found myself in a person's backyard,  listening. "Listening to what?" I hear you ask.

Listening to an anguished tale of being targeted by drones. The city drones, which are being operated by the County Drone Force. (CDF) Our conversation went like this:

"I declare. I am being targeted by drones."

"That's just terrible."

"It is! They come at night and hover, just over there."

"Where?"

"Why, just beyond that tree. Maybe they think I won't see them, but I do!"

"Good heavens."

"Yes. This town is positively trying to drive me from my house. But I will give it to them. For the children."

"For the children?"

"Yes, for the children. Have you read the Book of Revelations?"

It is a terrible thing to fall into the hands of an angry drone.

God bless,

LSP

Well Done

Abu Sayyaf

According to AP, U.S. Special Forces killed a senior ISIS commander, Abu Sayyaf, and captured his wife, as well as freeing a Yazidi woman who was being kept as a slave.

The raid took place in Syria, where Sayyaf was killed after what was described by a National Security Council spokeswoman as an "intense firefight" with some "hand to hand combat."

All US forces returned to base. 

More, please.

LSP

Who Are These People?

Some say that Cameron and Osborne are Edwardian Prefects with the minds of ASDA managers.

With Michael Gove as their fag.

(U.S. readers take note: "fag," in this instance, does not mean a privileged and protected class of wealthy, white, upwardly mobile, litigious citizens, but a junior boy at boarding school who acts as a servant to the senior boys.)

Carry on,

LSP

Big Cash In Bed With Big Gay

You might think that Indiana's Religious Freedom Restoration Act was rolled back by enraged squadrons of oppressed interior designers and hairdressers. Try adding Corporate America to the equation.

Here's Patrick Deneen, writing for First Things:

"This past spring, we saw something quite different and revealing and worrying. With the imprimatur of American elites, which was clearly given in the furor over Indiana’s RFRA, religiously based opposition to gay marriage is now more than ever likely to be treated by our society as tantamount to a hate crime. This elite-sanctioned attack on “bigotry” will not stop at Memories Pizza. It will be extended first to religious nonprofit institutions that insist upon the view that marriage is between a man and a woman—the schools, the colleges, the adoption services—and then will reach inevitably into the sanctuaries of the churches ­themselves. The narrative of bigotry will demand nothing less, and the protection that might have been afforded by RFRA and the First Amendment has been shown to be a parchment barrier in comparison with the might and power of cultural and financial elites."

Big Cash in bed with Big Gay? Better believe it. You can read the whole thing here.

Have a blessed Feast of the Ascension.

LSP

Wednesday Night Jukebox

It's Wednesday night and I'm cleaning a pistol, listening to Mr. Cash, and wondering where the Anglican Communion has got to.

Maybe it's in high orbit somewhere, maybe it's on Mars, or deep beneath the icy waters of Enceladus. Perhaps the Large Hadron Collider will discover it when they break into a new dimension. I don't know, maybe that's what will happen.

In the meanwhile, I heard a voice in the midst of the four beasts.

Do not take that lightly.

LSP

Religious Freedom v. Big Gay

Do you remember Rachel and Laurel Bowman-Cryer? Sure you do, they're the lesbians who sued Aaron and Melissa Klein for refusing to bake them a gay wedding cake and got a whopping $135,000 award from an Oregon court, payable by the Kleins. Happy day for the Cryers, not so fun for the Kleins.

This, and other cases like it, along with the all-too-real prospect of the US Supreme Court ruling that gay marriage is a Constitutional right, has got trads like myself worried. If they'll go for the bakers, we ask ourselves, why not schools, hospitals, charities and churches. 

After all, if opposition to gay marriage is simply a matter of discrimination, it should be banned across the board. Religious freedom, in so many words, does not equal freedom to be bigoted. Albert Mohler calls this the most "serious threat to religious freedom in our time."

I don't think being opposed to gay marriage and saying no to baking cakes for people like Stephen Fry, or the curiously named Cryers, is discrimination, I think it's good sense, grounded in the divinely ordered nature of things. Of course the gay lobby sees otherwise. But the question remains, do orthodox Christians have something to fear from this?

Well, if you're the Kleins, you do. No doubt about it. But what about the churches? Do they risk persecution at the hands of the State? Let's "worst-case" the scenario.

The Archbishop of San Fransissyco is put in jail for anti-gay "hate speech" and Biblically minded pastors around the country are rounded up and put in FEMA death camps, overwatched by DAARPA designed pink drones. In the meanwhile, the churches lose tax-exempt status and go out of business.

Possible? Sure, so was the NSDAP. But not likely, there's too many Christians, with too many votes, to make this realistic, at least for now. And even if it was, the action of the atheist temporal power would galvanize Christians to really practice their faith, as opposed to sitting it out like a pew potato on the occasional Sunday.

With this in mind, the worst case starts to look like a win for Christianity; it'd have to become intentional, and that's no bad thing. After all, the Church was built on the blood of the martyrs, not the yawns of the indifferent. That's the worst case, and it results in a win for traditionalists; the Christian base is mobilized.

There's another possibility, which is more in tune with reality. Most Americans are pretty tolerant, they don't really care if Rachel and Laurel want to say they're married, and if they want the benefits that go with that, all well and good. Knock yourselves out, girls, and don't take the loathsome Rosie O'Donnell as an example.

But in the same breath, the majority of the nation, who want to be fair to the Cryers, also want to be fair to Christians, they don't want to see them hounded out of business and witch-hunted. In brief -- spite, vindictiveness and Gaystapo-Style rulings from the courts don't sit well, at all. And if that continues, with the pink behemoth of intolerance continuing to overplay its hand, there'll be serious push-back. This scenario, too, is a win for traditionalists.

Message to market? Don't be a pew potato, stand up for your faith, prepare for the worst even, get ready to fight back. At the same time, don't be afraid of a mod. viv. with people whose views you disagree with. There doesn't, at this point, have to be a war.

Come And Take It

I hope.

LSP