Beyonce Mass Better Than Clown Mass?

Pastor Jude Harmon of the Episcopal Church's Grace Cathedral, San Francisco, got more than he bargained for when he held a special Beyonce worship ritual at the famously LGBTQ church.

Within hours of the special service devoted to praising the popular singer, pundits were comparing the Beyonce ritual to a Clown Mass.

Jude Harmon, Left of Rainbow

"This is no better than a blasphemous Clown Mass," thundered one outraged Anglican clergyperson, who wishes to remain anonymous, "At least Clown Masses are honestly creepy, this isn't and that's scary." Others weren't so sure.

A Clown

"Clown Masses are deeply offensive," stated a senior member of the clergy, "Everyone knows that clowns at the altar are sinister and off-putting. Beyonce may be a member of the Illuminati along with her husband, Jay Z, but she's not repellently unattractive and frightening. Quite unlike a clown."

Several Baptist leaders were quick to point out that Beyonce's fertility goddess performance at the Grammys was idolatrous. At the star studded event, the pop diva superstar dressed up as the Virgin Mary and a Hindu deity, as opposed to a clown, leading some to accuse her of "immoral syncretism."

Beyonce

Unfazed by fierce criticism, Harmon defended his decision to host a Beyonce ritual instead of a Clown Mass at Grace Cathedral.

"I know there are people who will say using Beyoncé is just a cheap way of trying to get people in the church," Harmon said. "Jesus used very provocative images in the stories he would tell to incite people to ask hard questions about their own religious assumptions. He regularly provoked. We're following in the way of Jesus."

Beyonce And Abramovic, Third From Left

Grace Cathedral typically gets 50 people at its Wednesday evening Eucharist, as opposed to 900 for its Beyonce worship ritual. Known for rainbow riding diversity, Grace Cathedral's Pastor, Jude Harmon, opened last year's Pride "with a reflection and meditation on diversity, inclusiveness and religious tolerance."

Not The Virgin Mary

Beyonce was brought up a Methodist, the Episcopal Church was once Christian. Whether the Beyonce praise ceremony at Grace Cathedral, San Francisco, is better or worse than a Clown Mass is something for you to decide.

Don't be shy, be the judge,

LSP

Melania Mondays!

Here at Melania Mondays! we're taking a break from weapons cleaning and the curious relationship between Jay Z and Marina Abramovic to bring you up to date on the life of America's popular and glamorous First Lady.

Melania doesn't take insults lightly, far from it, and took time off from visiting the Holocaust museum in DC to blast "salacious & flat-out false reporting" by the "fake news" media.

"BREAKING:The laundry list of salacious & flat-out false reporting about Mrs. Trump by tabloid publications & TV shows has seeped into 'main stream media' reporting," stated FLOTUS spokewoman, Stephanie Grisham, on Twitter, "She is focused on her family & role as FLOTUS - not the unrealistic scenarios being peddled daily by the 'fake news.'"

Despite massive popularity at home and abroad, Melania has been attacked in the media for being in an allegedly false marriage to a philandering husband. Stories of President Trump's supposed infidelity center on a porn star, Stormy Daniels.

In a legal statement, Stormy denied that she ever had sexual relations with Trump or received "hush money" from him. Stormy, real name Clifford, also denied that she was "greedy or an opportunist," causing observers to wonder if her recent stripper tour, "Make America Horny Again," is non-profit.

In the meanwhile, Melania's East Wing staff costs are more than 40% less than her unpopular predecessor's.  

Well done Melania for doing your part to make America great again.

MAGA,

LSP

Jay Z, Willing Slave of Abramovic?

Popstar Illuminati legend, Jay Z, has come out swinging against Trump on CNN, accusing the President of being a "superbug" who sprayed "perfume on a trashcan." The President's crime? Reducing black unemployment to the lowest it's been in history.

What a criminal. In the meanwhile, photos have emerged of Jay Z cowering before Marina Abramovic.

Does Abramovic own Jay Z? While litigation argues otherwise, pictures tell a different story.

As America's top art witch, Abramovic is famous for "spirit cooking" and a friend of the Podestas along with other members of the NWO Illuminati elite.

Jay Z is a deep thinking MillSoc celebrity with an estimated net worth of $180 million. Abramovic is a celebrity art witch and Gaga? Willing protege.

Kick out the JAMS.

LSP

Transfiguration

Today's the last Sunday of the Epiphany and Jesus appears in the Gospel, transfigured and standing between Moses and Elijah, as the fulfillment of prophecy and the law. I preached on that, emphasizing the spiritual ascent of the faithful up Mt. Tabor, culminating in our own transfiguration.

Easier said than done, of course, as we fall back down the mountain from time to time. "The Devil made me do it the first time," I told the congregation, "the second time I done it all on my own." 

Some say that a sermon's only half a sermon if it doesn't include at least one line from Waylon Jennings.

Enjoy the game,

LSP

Usury, Aquinas and Baphomet

Usury, taking interest on a loan, used to be considered a sin. Now it's the keystone virtue of our civilization. Here's some Aquinas, from somewhere in the Summa:

Article I.—Is it a sin to take usury for the lending of money?

R. To take usury for the lending of money is in itself unjust, because it is a case of selling what is non-existent; and that is manifestly the setting up of an inequality contrary to justice. In evidence of this we must observe that there are certain things, the use of which is the consumption of the thing; as we consume wine by using it to drink, and we consume wheat by using it for food. Hence in such things the use of the thing ought not to be reckoned apart from the thing itself; but whosoever has the use granted to him, has thereby granted to him the thing; and therefore in such things lending means the transference of ownership. If therefore any vendor wanted to make two separate sales, one of the wine and the other of the use of the wine, he would be selling the same thing twice over, or selling the non-existent: hence clearly he would be committing the sin of injustice. And in like manner he commits injustice, who lends wine or wheat, asking a double recompense to be given him, one a return of an equal commodity, another a price for the use of the commodity, which price of use is called usury. 

Our present economic and financial system is based on usury; every Dollar we grasp in our eager spending hands is issued by the Fed, at interest. The borrower (USGOV) must repay this debt by getting more money, which comes, ultimately, from selling more things.

But there's only so much you can sell in a finite world, and only so much that people want, or need, or are able to buy. Despite the marketeers, infinite usurious growth is unsustainable.

As a last ditch measure, the financial powers are leaning towards negative interest rates and a ban on cash, in a desperate bid to get people to spend more and fuel the debt engine. This will fail and end in a reset, which will not be pretty, to put it mildly.

With that in mind, why do you think local PDs are investing in MRAPS?

Message to market: Prepare for the worst, and be happily surprised if it doesn't come down, Baphomet-Style, on our iniquitous and devilish society. But perhaps it already is? You be the judge.

Your Pal,

LSP

Putin, the New Talleyrand?

Thanks to Drudge, everyone knows that Tony Brenton, former UK Ambassador to Moscow, doesn't see Russian strongman, Vladimir Putin, as a land-grabbing, latter-day Hitler, but as a new Talleyrand. Here's an excerpt from his article in today's Telegraph:

"The 'we must stand up to Putin as we did to Hitler' line is pure schoolboy politics. Putin, of whom I saw a fair amount as UK ambassador to Moscow, is not an ideologically driven fanatic, but much closer to Talleyrand – the calculating, pragmatic rebuilder of his country’s status in the world." 

Talleyrand

You can read the whole thing here, but if Putin is a new Talleyrand, what does that make Obama? You know, the first LGBTQ President who's developed this smart strategy to defeat ISIS by, er, arming ISIS.

Pyramid Power?

Senior Defense Industry analysts have speculated that Beyonce, Jay Z and Obama himself, are in a bizarre "love triangle."

Perhaps the President's distracted.

Kick out the Jams,

LSP