Heading Home

All too soon my Northern exeat was over and I headed back across the bridge to the U.S., where I was given the third degree at the border by an overzealous border guard. "Why were you in Africa?" he asked. "For the hunting, officer." (I wish) But no matter, one truck search over and I was on my way. 

I want this building in Windsor

I stopped outside of Nashville, again, because I'm a traditionalist and I like El Jardin's Mexican food and frozen maragaritas. The next day I drove through to Dallas, stopping at Texarkana to gas up and get a hamburger. Some guy in a fishing shirt wandered over to a Yukon that was waiting in the drive-through line and started swearing at the driver, who looked understandably scared. I watched this from the comparative safety of the side of my pickup, waiting for the shot, but there wasn't one. A vicious little scene inside the Texarkana goldmine.

A Hippy.

An hour or two later Dallas rose out of the heat haze as the traffic roared into town from Rockwall. One day, I suppose, it'll be a ruin and, or, a very large mound, but for now the city prospers. It has few hippies, unlike Austin, where they're a menace.

Good to be back in Texas and, of course, the South.

LSP

Bank Fishing the Detroit River and Lake Erie

Some people might argue that there isn't a lot to do in Windsor, Ontario, but they'd be wrong. You can go fishing on the Detroit river. Not having access to a boat - sort it out - I resorted to bank fishing. There's ready access to the river by the Ambassador Bridge and Langlois and Riverside, which is where I went.

Matty Moroun

I found the Bridge best, with lots of fish breaking the surface and one toxic looking catfish(?) following my 10" red plastic worm into the bank, only to sniff at it lazily and drift away. So, long story short, I didn't catch anything but had fun trying. 

"I just throw everything I've got in, eh."

Perhaps I was using the wrong lures and bait; word to the wise, there's plenty of minnows schooling by the bank so it's probably a good idea to take a bait net and use those. Next time. Regardless, it was neat to gaze out across the water at the seemingly normal face of Detroit but no foolin', it's a jungle out there.

Erieau Beach

Made it out to Erieau beach too and took the young 'uns for a bit of rod & reel fun on the promontory leading to the "light house". A beautiful, uncrowded beach, not dissimilar to Rehoboth but without the boardwalk, buildings, crowds and marauding gangs of tackheads that make the commercial Atlantic coast a misery. Well done Canada, you haven't wrecked Erieau.

Catch Some Fish! Or Try...

Annoyingly, the promontory was being over fished by the Japanese, who had a weird monopoly on the place. They trolled away and caught the occasional small mouth Bass, which they put in plastic buckets. Still, we cast away and got a few bites but no strikes. As with the Detroit river, fun trying.

It's not over, fish. (Spot the derelict train station)

Fish, you won this time. Don't get complacent.

Cheers,

LSP

Road Trip, Dallas to Detroit and Windsor

Sometimes, in the summer, I head North to visit family and friends in Windsor and Detroit. I drove this time, via Memphis, Nashville and Cincinnati. Why? Because I wanted to see Kentucky and Tennessee, even if it was just from the road, and I liked the idea of the drive. "Get out and see something of America!" I thought, adventurously.

I like Tennessee

There was ferocious rain from Little Rock onwards, which forced me to stop at Kingston Springs, just outside of Nashville. Big relief to get off of the zero-viz highway and into the strangely good El Jardin Mexican restaurant. Tasty, cheap, fresh food and frozen margaritas that went down just right.

Cincinnati

The next day it was on to Cincinnati, Dayton, Toledo and Detroit. I always enjoy the last stretch of the drive. As you leave the well put together, speed-limit-abiding Ohio highway and get onto I75, the road becomes a pot-holed Mad Max slalom. Flak jacket on, you're getting close to the Motor(way) City.

O Canada!

I took the Ambassador Bridge into Windsor.

It was good to be back in Canada.

Cheers,

LSP

Gun Rights

I like shooting, a lot, and I like the 2nd Amendment too, it's alright.

"A well regulated Militia, being necessary to the security of a free State, the right of the people to keep and bear Arms, shall not be infringed."

Hitler and Piers Morgan were against that. Piers is gone now, back to England. The Russians have what's left of the other one, or do they?

Shoot straight,

LSP

Liturgical Dance Is Not Awesome

Some people think that liturgical dance is awesome.

They think it uplifts the spirit and expresses the ascent of the soul towards union with God Himself.

Deluded fools.

All for Texas.

LSP

Archbishop of Canterbury, Wire Guided Android?

Speculation is building that the Archbishop of Canterbury, Justin Welby, who is known as "Dobby", may be a guide-by-wire android.

Proof emerged during Dobby's tour to South Africa, where observers spotted a wire protruding from the back of the Archbishop's head. Previously considered a stand-alone, autonomous Artificial Intelligence (AI), it now appears that the Canterbury Class Churchbot is controlled.

Wire Guided

"All this time I thought of Dobby as sort of an autonomous evil droid - like the sorts on Star Wars. Sure, the Dark Side of the Force controlled him, but now this new revelation that he's wire guided. It's disturbing," stated a U.S. defense systems expert.

Droid

If true, the implications are worrying. What outside power is controlling the Dobby 'droid, and why? Who is at the other end of the wire; God, or something else?

LSP

I Hate Clown Masses

Maybe you like Clown Masses. Maybe you don't think they're sinister and wrong.

Sinister

That'd be a bad mistake.

Typical Dobby, Goofing Off

God bless,

LSP

Brandon Texas

I'll be driving off to Windsor/Detroit next week so I thought I should get some practice time at the range. That takes me through Brandon.

Brandon's Post Office

There's not a lot there, some dirt roads, a few houses, an abandoned Presbyterian church, a small Post Office and a Co-Op.

Brandon's Co-Op

Some people are afraid of places like Brandon. Perhaps they should be.

T Posts

I find the Brandonites I know friendly, unlike the Austin leftists who'll rip you off in the maze of a labyrinth and at the drop of a dreadlock.

Shoot, Ride, Fish

Shoot straight,

LSP

Obama, Putin's Poodle?

I'd say Dmitry Rogozin's photo tweet of Vladimir Putin and Barack Obama speaks for itself, but I'll leave you to guess which world leader has over 80% approval ratings at home. And supports the Church. Hint, it's not the Communist.

Cheers, 

LSP

Obama World Peace Solution

In a desperate bid to bring about an end to war and quell turbulent unrest in its own backyard, America's top-level Messiah Class Obama 'droid launched a bold new peace initiative in an ornate Kansas theater.

Teeth 3000

Speaking to a disappointingly small crowd of 1,500 admirers, the Messiah 'droid urged radical non-aggression. "Stop being mad all the time. Stop, stop, stop just hatin’ all the time," said the deep-thinking hi-tech replicant to raucous cheering and applause.

Observers of the U.S. government's attempt to cut costs and improve efficiency by deploying robot technology are divided. Some believe that there is a clear AI hierarchy, with the Messiah 'droid leading lesser robots, such as the Teeth 3000, the Witch and Woodentop. 

The Witch

Others aren't so sure, with one pundit stating, "Barack=Hillary=Kerry in leadership, charisma, integrity and capability to be Leader of the Free World."

Whatever the case, Republicans have voted to sue the Messiah 'droid for abusing its DAARPA designated Executive Power. It appears that the Obama peace initiative has arrived dead in the water, as doomed as Woodentop's disastrous Gaza ceasefire proposal and the Witch's defense of the Hamas terror group.

Woodentop

Is there an AI hierarchy? Or are all the 'droids equally malfunctioning?

LSP

The Witch Weighs In

Smarting from Woodentop's weekend Gaza ceasefire fiasco, the Administration deployed another state-of-the-art Foreign Policy 'droid, the Witch, in an attempt to justify its pro-Hamas stance.

Dunderhead

In an interview with Fusion T.V., the Witch explained why the terror group based its operations in hospitals, Mosques and other civilian areas. 

Deceitful

According to the former Secretary of State, it's all down to geography and demographics.

"I'm not a military planner but Hamas puts it's missiles, it's rockets in civilian areas, part of it is Gaza is pretty small and its densely populated," stated the replicant.

Rich

The Witch, who has claimed to be poor, was given a whopping $8 million book advance and is regularly paid six figures for speaking engagements. The duplicitous android shares several million dollar homes with its husband "Bill". Their net worth is estimated at $55 million by 24/7 Wall Street.

Way to go, "Hillary."

LSP

Woodentop Epic Foreign Policy Fail

You know what it's like, budgets are tight, skilled human resources thin, so you automate and put a couple of robots on the job. For the U.S., that means sending Woodentop to the Middle East to broker a ceasefire between Israel and Hamas. Good idea, right? No, bad idea, because our DAARPA designed SECSTATE 'bot doesn't work right. Due to a programming glitch, it seems that Woodentop forgot about Hamas' terror tunnels in its peace proposal.

Amateurish

Unsurprisingly, Israel mocked Woodentop's next to useless performance. According to the Times of Israel, “Leaked comments from unnamed senior government sources to Army Radio, Channel 2 and other Hebrew outlets have described the secretary as amateurish, incompetent, incapable of understanding the material he is dealing with – in short, a blithering fool.”

Incompetent

Others were more scathing, accusing the inept 'droid of being a space alien. "It's as if he isn't the foreign minister of the world's most powerful nation, but an alien, who just disembarked his spaceship in the Mideast," wrote Barack Ravid, for the left-leaning Haaretz newspaper.

Failed

What next? In the words of one commentator, "Go back to Beacon Hill, Woodentop. Jackass." We can only hope.

John Kerry, even though you are an android replicant, you get a sturdy10 Alien Head Awards.

LSP

x10