Empty Soulless Shills

It's Super Tuesday and what have we here? Three contenders for the DNC throne of total, absolute power. Yes, the presidential nomination itself. So just who are these people?

Joe Biden, handle Groper. Net worth $9 million, a Socialist. Supports up to birth abortion. Age: 77.

Bernie Sanders, aka The Bern. Net worth $2 million, a Socialist, kicked off the commune for thieving from fridges. Supports abortion to the point of birth. Age: 78.

Michael Bloomberg, street name Mini-Mike. Net worth: $64 billion, a dwarven Socialist who hates guns and has no soul. Supports abortion to the point of birth. Age: 78.

Which one of these millionaire, sorry, billionaire socialists will claim the prize? Money's on Biden unless, of course, Michelle decides to run. And will the Anarcho-Marxist Bernists decide to riot? Hey, bring it on. 

Michelle, age 56, has a sturdy socialist net worth of $70 million and she's married to an anointed God King to boot. Roll over, Joe, and let the big dogs in. 

Is Liawatha even in this thing? I forget.

Your Old Friend,

LSP

Rural America Salutes Bloomberg

Thanks for the accurate infographic, Egyptian. So God made a farmer.

That is all.

LSP

Behold Bloomberg Genius

Billionaire Mini-Mike Bloomberg isn't just paying for cringey text memes on Instagram, he's taking out ads on billboards. Look, here's one.

Uh Huh, 45's Doomed

Here's another. 

And Now he's totally doomed, thanks to Mini's genius PR

Wow, 45's doomed. As you reflect on the sheer PR genius of Mini's campaign, stop and ask yourself why the Left can't meme.

It's weird, they've all been to art school, they're all super creative, they read the New York Times so they're obviously amazingly smart, and Mammon knows they've got the cash. Oh yes, in plenty. Maybe this helpful infovideo illustrates the blindingly obvious point.

Democrat campaign ad spending (thru Sunday). 💰 pic.twitter.com/LqZAeh0JOS

— SOMETHiNG WiCKËD (@som3thingwicked) February 20, 2020

So much money, Mini's got $60 billion alone, but they fall weirdly, jarringly short. Strange, right, could it be because these people have sold their souls to Satan? 

Zoltar speaks... pic.twitter.com/j4961pgjdY

— SOMETHiNG WiCKËD (@som3thingwicked) February 21, 2020

Before you accuse the editorial staff at the Compound of sensationalist hyperbole, consider this. Every single one of the Democrat candidates for the presidency is in favor of abortion up to the point of birth, possibly beyond.

SW archive (updated Feb 20)

🔥 https://t.co/GcjUEG4OyO
2⃣ https://t.co/W65raAEQRi
3⃣ https://t.co/85SV8k1qUq
4⃣ https://t.co/HhpmxZmT68
5⃣ https://t.co/MFT9QX8N6q
6⃣ https://t.co/pxgta4Jgg0
7⃣ https://t.co/SPYcKHXQv3
RSG https://t.co/Jg0jH21Ltc
BIDEN https://t.co/jWQmgBjGWF pic.twitter.com/cIGcUzs0tn

— SOMETHiNG WiCKËD (@som3thingwicked) February 6, 2020

Perhaps it's hard to enlist humor in defense of the grinding evil of such a platform. D'ye think? In the meanwhile, congrats to Something Wicked.

#Landslide2020,

LSP

Mini Mike Wishes He Was Taller

Like Adrienne, the Compound won't comment on last night's clownshow of a debate in which Mini-Mike got himself scalped by Liawatha and all the other commies. But we're delighted to offer this educational infovideo.

As one pundit put it, "Mini didn't get much for the $400 million. We could've done a lot more with that money, developed a world class hunting and fishing camp. Maybe buy a county in Wyoming." Yes, with a small but powerful Army, mounted, obviously.

Check out Tucker on Mini-Mike, if you haven't already. He thinks Mini's a direct threat to democracy. We're not so sure and refer you to the $400 million++ spent by this dwarven buffoon to look like... yes, a gilt-edged billionaire buffoon.

Meanwhile, 45's holding massive rallies.

Landslide 2020,

LSP

The Grand Marshal

They came at him with the polls, only a fool would think he'd be president. They came at him with Mueller, Brennan, McCabe, Comey and all the apparatus of the deep state swamp and its puppet media. They came at him again with impeachment, and guess what. They lost, he won, and took a well deserved victory lap at the Daytona 500.

It started off with an Air Force One flyby for the benefit of all those flyover country people, who thunderously cheered, and go figure. 45 has their back, he's working without pay to bring jobs, business, prosperity and pride back to a country that's been gutted by transnational elite asset-strippers, and their bought and paid for bi-coastal, millionaire socialist elite shills.

Our Grand Marshal summed up the effort as he started the race, Gentlemen, start your engines. Then he climbed into the Beast with America's popular and glamorous First Lady for a few laps around the track. 

Yes, a triumph. For 45, for Nascar, for ordinary Americans everywhere who love their country and stubbornly cling to their God, guns and freedom. Well done, Mr. President, we salute you.

Then there's Mini-Mike, he wants to be president too, here's a promo video:

Mike Bloomberg as Mary Poppins pic.twitter.com/BeYshVZk4X

— Jack Posobiec 🇺🇸 (@JackPosobiec) February 17, 2020

But maybe Little Mermaid's better?

Mike Bloomberg as the Little Mermaid pic.twitter.com/zyvtGQ4QLn

— Jack Posobiec 🇺🇸 (@JackPosobiec) February 17, 2020

Like, what? Mini-Mike, what's wrong with you. Punters, I'm not a betting man but I'll wager the fighting monkey on Landslide 2020.

Your Friend,

LSP

The Horror

Yes, the sheer horror of the moment as you contemplate the dark, Devil-inspired plan to turn this small Texan country town into a shamtique mawl. Well it didn't work, thank God, and perhaps the above infographic explains why. The horror.

Speaking of which, note this Wuhan to world flight chart showing air travel out of the coronavirus hotzone before racism took over and restrictions were put in place. Scary? 

I'd say so and so does the World Health Organization, which predicts the deadly weaponized virus will become a "community affair" this year or next. Maybe they're wrong. Whatever, smart people are stockpiling food, ammo and hazmat suits.

In other terrifying news, the traitorous liberal media outlet Drudge Report tells us that Mini Mike - "put him on a box" - Bloomberg's thinking of campaigning with Hillary as Vice President. What can we say, Mini Mike's an incredibly brave little man. 

Could this be the Old Crone's route to the absolute, ultimate, no-holds-barred power she craves and deserves? Watch out, Mini, it's her turn.

Such frightening news, and we haven't even got to the venerable Church of England's apology tour. Therein, readers, hangs another tale. In the meanwhile, here's an uplifting infographic to raise the spirits.

Justice for Juicy!

LSP

Virginia Cryptids - The Scallywagster

The Commonwealth of Virginia has a long and storied past, not least as home to a mysterious cryptid Old Dominion locals call "Scallywagster."

As far back as the 1700s, Virginia residents claimed a giant  carpet bag carrying, blackfaced reptilian bird would appear in the sky, and swoop down to attack freedom, pets, game, livestock, adults and sometimes even children. 

Eyewitness descriptions of the Scallywagster resemble that of a Mountebankesaur; an enormous flying monster with an absurdly claimed wingspan of twenty-five to thirty feet, a long smirking beak, and revolting, leathery, sagging, reptilian neck skin. 

The Scallywagster has tentacles, bloombergs, and carries with it the pungent scent of corruption, degeneracy and death. According to witnesses, its shriek resembles a drunken loser at the Kentucky Derby.

Reports of the Scallywagster are ongoing. Virginians be vigilant, wise and safe.

Gun Rights,

LSP

Virginia State Of Emergency

So what's the score? Governor Ralph "Minstrel" Northam's declared a "state of emergency" and banned guns from the state Capitol this Friday through Tuesday. He's afraid a Second Amendment demonstration on Monday's going to turn into an "armed insurrection."

Well now, it might just possibly become exactly that because Virginians who are already enraged at Minstrel's virtue signalling, Bloomberg paid-for gun grab aren't going to obey Governor Blackface Northam. 

No, they'll go to Richmond armed. And they'll do so because they believe a free citizenry is free to defend itself against tyranny. Not least from its own government.

2A justification aside, what does Minstrel hope to achieve by this posturing, is he trying to provoke a showdown? Possibly, "Just look at all those white supremacist Nazis, with guns! Good thing we've got the National Guard to shoot them all before some kind of goddam Richmond beer hall putsch!"

And that's just it. Since when are Virginian LE and the Guard going to fire on their brothers and sisters in defense of some fraudulant, MillSoc, Bloomberg pawn mountebank? I'd say never, I hope, and Minstrel has to know it.

So what's the score? I'd argue political theater and dangerous brinksmanship on Minstrel's part. He doubtless believes in gun control to the extent that he blackface believes in racial equality. What an utter fraud. 

The 2A crew are different, they really do believe and guess what? They know how to shoot. Poke that tiger at your peril. 

#VCDL forever,

LSP