Saturday, November 12, 2016

Vicarious Duck Hunting

"I'm off to the lease early," said my philisophical pal, GWB, "So I can shoot some ducks and get back to the metrosprawl for Mass." And that's what he did, see above.

I wanted to join in, too, but couldn't because of a funeral and a wedding, to say nothing of a burned hand. Speaking of which, my old friend, VCC (Veteran Crew Chief), who once turned out a roving band of motorcycle hippies from his stock tank, asked me how the hand was doing.


"How's that hand, LSP?"
"Better, but here's my advice."
"What's that?"
"Don't pour boiling oil on your fingers. If you do, they're good for nothing."
"Hey, you can always eat them."

A Typical Motorcycle Hippy

VCC tells me he enjoyed Laos, Cambodia and helicopters but didn't much like the military, or motorcycle hippies chancing it out of Austin. Regardless, for me, the hunting's vicarious. That will change.

Get out in the field.



Euripides said...

Sorry about your crispy fingers. Youch!

Fredd said...

I hate to break your bubble, Pastor, but biker chicks typically do not look like that gal on the back of Zack Barton's ride.

Biker chicks are typically a bit rougher around the edges, have badly done tattoos, bad teeth and swear like sailors. Typically, but not always.

LL said...

I've seen really attractive biker chicks, sadly most are tweeker whores and the meth destroys them in short order and they transform into the dystopian women that Fredd identified.

As to ducks...the fingers will mend and the ducks will still be there. Try buying Vitamin E capsules (get the cheap kind), puncture them and spread the contents on the burn. Alternatively use honey. Both work very well.

A brisket burrito (from Karen's, naturally) also helps - not with the burn on your hand, but with the gnawing hunger that comes from not having ducks to cook.

If you are despondent, and wish to say, "farewell cruel world", Fredd might be able to arrange a spaghetti dinner at Aunt Sally's house. I think that she lives in Texas somewhere.

LSP said...

It was pretty nasty, Euripides... better now, but still.

LSP said...

Fredd, I have to agree. Zak's "friend" isn't very representative of the biker tribe. But remember, they're "motorcycle hippies," different crew, eh?

LSP said...

LL, great advice on all fronts, though Karen's is "under construction," annoyingly.

I found Bio Oil helped a lot -- think it has vit e in it... on the mend, thank God.