Old Retainer

It's been a busy couple of days, not least with editing a behind schedule magazine. Imagine staring at a screen and asking yourself what does that even ****ing mean? #delete. 

You see, the Red Death's turned all the writers into intellectuals. Annoying. Still, it's not been so busy that you can't take time out on the porch for Evening Prayer and gentle reflection.

Which is exactly what I was doing when Roy came by, sent from LR on a courier mission. Envelope duly passed on, Roy explained his homemade mask, he plans to "get in front of of any dam virus and I see you sittin' there so I hand this over. An' I tell your son, make friends wisely."

Yes indeed and I told him that the Private was due to ship out to South Korea at the end of June, but that didn't register, "Miss Ray, she gave me a shot of wine. Strong! But I'm not going to lift a can on my porch. Nossir. Every fool be knockin' down my door. I avoid trouble. Yes, I do."

With that, and after ten minutes more of the same, Roy went back from whence he'd come. Moral of the story? More and better servants? No. Serve to lead.

To Hell with Reconstruction,

LSP

Grilling In The Plague Year - Cooking With LSP

Tell me, so-called "LSP," if that's your real name, which we doubt, what's it like to grill in the Chinese Plague Year? 

Well I'll tell you, it's much like grilling in any other year except we have the spectacle of the Russia Coup unraveling and Biden's campaign to boot; don't ask Tara Reade. This pushes things forward, into sundown and beyond.

No matter, behold the grill glowing red hot in the night, like a small blast furnace or UFO. At the appointed time, tip those coals out into the grill. For me it's a Weber, you probably have gigantic smoker/grill combos. Well done, cowboys.

Next step? Oil up the grid, put it in place, lid on, and heat 'er up! Stand back for a bit, maybe run a pull-through down the barrel of an SKS, up to you, no rule. Then take the lid off the Weber and... add burgers. They should sizzle when they hit the grill. Important.

So. 1 minute sear on each side, uncovered, and 3 minutes a side covered. That's my method and it changes per heat of the coals and size of the patties. But whatev. Look in wonder at your burgers and...

Fall on your scoff like a warrior,

LSP

A Confederate Speaks

You will notice the General speaks in similar tones, albeit colonial, as the Queen. Therein lies an edifying sermon, but listen to this man who fought in the War of Northern Aggression. 

Note "probably fortunate, maybe unfortunate... we charged them." And "right in the midst of the sermon..." and more. Now think of this. When Julius was a boy, his Grandparents most certainly remembered 1776.

Here's the thing, State's Rights. For some of us that may well be a Communist dictatorship. Michigan, apparently, is of that kind. CW2?

Your Old Friend,

LSP

Victory Charge

You see, gentlemen, we have an objective. Take the war to the Jihad, and the Hun, obviously.

Well done, boys!

LSP

Pentagon UFO Disclosure

The Department of Defense has finally declassified three previously leaked UFO videos taken by US Navy aircrew in 2004 and 2015. Labelled FLIR, GOFAST and GIMBAL, the films show unidentified aerial craft performing maneuvers beyond the capability of known tech. So what are these UAPs (Unexplained Aerial Phenomenon) and why have they been declassified now?

In answer, no one knows, including the airmen who took the video, they're clearly baffled and excited by the strangeness of what they're seeing. But we can speculate: Hi-Tech ET's, space aliens, extra-dimensional beings, ourselves from the future, demons, random ACoC experiments in theology, secret government tech?

In Space No One Can Hear You Scream

Your call, though I gravitate towards secret government tech or ETs. After all, it can't be the Anglican Church of Canada (ACoC) as that left the planet long ago, and if demons they'd surely be more aggressive. Are they us from the future or another dimension/timeline? If so, are they condemned to a continuous temporal loop? Bad place to be, see Many Dimensions. 

And why official Navy/DOD/Pentagon imprimatur now? There they are, telling us there's unexplained flying objects in the atmosphere and there it is. Fact. What is this, phase one of Full Disclosure?

You be the judge and stay tuned.

Ad Astra,

LSP

Team Joe

We all know Joe's the Democrat candidate to go up against 45. He's famous for saying transsexualism's the "greatest civil rights issue of our time," or something pretty much exactly that. As if Biden cared about trannies or anyone else. 

Ask yourself how much this 78 year old millionaire socialist is worth and how much he glommed up when he was Obama's VP. Whole lotta loot, right?

And he's just not there, so everyone's saying another candidate's going to sweep in out of leftfield, save the day and restore the fortunes of the Democrats in the face of Orange Man Bad. Will it be Hillary? Michelle? The demon from Michigan? Kamala Harris?

Who knows, maybe Xi himself will stand. Hey, not as if he doesn't have vested interest with Joe and his son Hunter. But whoever it is you can be sure of this. They will all be in favor of killing babies up to the point of birth and beyond, and in the name of healthcare, bizarrely.

That in mind, think of Marina Abramovic as cultural attache to the world, backed up by Arch Satan Cecile Richards. Coz nothing says women's rights louder than infanticide. Note, the Devil's always demanded sacrifice and the more innocent the better. But perhaps this is a dark reflection, somehow morbid. So I'll leave you with Corn Pops.

That's our Joe, no malarkey!

Your Old Pal,

LSP

Godzilla Lockdown

Now, and perhaps more than ever, Blue Oyster Cult's immortal tune Godzilla strikes a chord. You can watch the great band's "lockdown" version here. They play it via Zoom, or something.

And thanks to all who've contributed to Linda's gofundme from this ill-read mind blog and elsewhere. About half way there, let's hit the target.

Your Old Pal,

LSP

Eastertide in Plague Year 2020

You may or may not be surprised to hear this, but Church of England clergy aren't allowed to livestream their bizarre worship rituals from their churches, much less say Mass in them. So they do it instead from stripped pine kitchens and walk-in closets. Here in Texas it's different. We set up outside.

Healthy and, for small missions, good for morale. Brings people together in time of adversity against our common enemy, China the Devil. Some of the young women tailgated, and fair play to 'em.

I suggested that, thanks to a rancher, we put hay bales between the rigs for next Sunday's Mass but he didn't like the idea. Can't imagine why not, Cowboy Church meets the Sacrament of the Altar sort of thing. 

Regardless, there it was, we worshiped God on a Sunday and the Sacrament was confected and all without staring at some kind of dam screen.

If you haven't given to Linda's cause you'd better do so, and sharpish. Sayn.

God bless and keep you all,

LSP

LINDA G - SERIOUS CALL FOR HELP

Our friend and fellow blogger, Linda G, lost her home to a tornado on Wednesday. Adrienne has set up a GoFundMe page to help her family out.

Linda's home was a 150 year old farmhouse which didn't qualify for insurance. So let's help. She is a veteran, a faithful Christian and a goodhearted gentlewoman. To help this good woman and her family go here:

LindaGoFundMe

And you know what the Epistle says, "faith without works is dead."

So kick in and help out.

I mean it.

LSP

Bonnie Blue

Dark to Light, 

Your Pal,

LSP

Go On, Unload The Truck

The local food bank was taking delivery of a big shipment this morning so I lent a hand unloading the truck. This meant I had to wear a mask for the first time in this strange and dystopic plague year.

Was the wretched mask necessary, and the curious black latex gloves which went with it? Who knows, they're just a "rule" at the food bank, but a Spyderco Persistence certainly came in handy for taking down boxes. It's my pandemic knife carry and seems right for the season.

Fascinating knives aside, there's a small Americana museum next door to the food bank, I think it's an excuse for someone to store his collection, and part of that means several ancient vehicles rusting in a lot beside the building. 

You can imagine the wonder of their makers at being told America would be shut down and 26 million unemployed in 2020 because of a Chinese Virus.

After a couple of hours the job was done and I headed off to Walmart to get some supplies for an elderly lady who doesn't get out much. You'll be glad to know this included a bottle of red wine, which she likes.

And please say a prayer for Linda G, a frequent commenter on this shallow mind blog. She lost her house to a tornado yesterday but, thank God, is safe and unharmed. 

LL puts it well, "Her comments on her own blog and on this one reflect her inner strength, her faith in God and her towering grace of spirit and love toward all." Well said, Mr. Wolf, and God bless you and give you strength, Linda.

Your Old Friend,

LSP

Walkabout

You know what it's like. There you are in the midst of a pandemic threatening to shut down Western Civ, what's left of it anyway, so whaddya do? 

Go for an armed stroll 'round town at 11 pm to see what's up. Load up and off you go, born to have adventure, sort of thing.

But what was up? Not very much. Flags were flying but the streets were empty. Had a neutron bomb gone off? Would you hit anyone if you fired a canon down the middle of the street? No.

So I strolled about and went to the downtown filling station for Marlboro Lights, then stood in the middle of the road and took photos. There wasn't any traffic, it's all shut down because of China, you see. Not that it's especially very busy ever.

Heading home, First Methodee was all lit up but no one was home and the Meth Shack was getting it on with a "domestic." I sensibly ignored the furor and strolled by, round in the chamber. And that was that, mission accomplished.

Message? If you're going walkabout, take a gun.

Best,

LSP