It Stays! Oompa Loompa or Man?

Right thinking people everywhere are wailing and gnashing their teeth in dismay and confusion, at the prospect of John Boehner remaining as Speaker of the House.

He's orange, like an Oompa Loompa; he might even be an Oompa Loompa. Here's a photo, to help you decide.

John Boehner, weirdly orange human being, or Oompa Loompa?

You, the reader, be the judge.

LSP

March of the Dhimmwits

You might remember the lesbian Bishop of Stockholm, Eva Brunne, who wants to remove Christian symbols, such as crosses, from one of her churches and replace them with a Muslim prayer room, in order to make Mohammedans more welcome. Well here's another dhimmwit, this time from Canada.

Clergyperson Cheryl Toth, from the Anglican Diocese of Qu'Appelle, decided to wear a hijab "for a day" because she's upset about anti-Muslim "hostility."

"I am afraid that [the rhetoric] will increase hostility towards women who choose to wear a hijab, a niqab or a burka,” stated Cheryl in a Facebook post, and that her decision to wear a hijab will "contribute to the conversation."

So what does the dictionary say? The word dhimmi is an Arabic noun, "which refers to a non-Muslim living a restricted life as a second-class subject of an Islamic state." 

Dhimmis have to pay a special tax, the Jizya, but perhaps Cheryl and Eva won't have to worry about that. They're well on the way to "submission" already.

Remember, Islam's like Buddhism, but a whole lot more peaceful.

Your Pal,

LSP

Battle of Lepanto

It's the 444th anniversary of the battle of Lepanto, in which a Mohammedan navy was destroyed by a smaller Christian force, led by Don John of Austria. It's a comparable victory to the lifting of the siege(s) of Vienna, and prevented the Jihad from invading Italy.

Here's an excerpt from Chesterton's Battle of Lepanto:

They gather and they wonder and give worship to Mahound.
And he saith, “Break up the mountains where the hermit-folk can hide,
And sift the red and silver sands lest bone of saint abide,
And chase the Giaours flying night and day, not giving rest,
For that which was our trouble comes again out of the west.
We have set the seal of Solomon on all things under sun,
Of knowledge and of sorrow and endurance of things done,
But a noise is in the mountains, in the mountains, and I know
The voice that shook our palaces—four hundred years ago:
It is he that saith not ‘Kismet’; it is he that knows not Fate ;
It is Richard, it is Raymond, it is Godfrey in the gate!
It is he whose loss is laughter when he counts the wager worth,
Put down your feet upon him, that our peace be on the earth.”
For he heard drums groaning and he heard guns jar,
(Don John of Austria is going to the war.)
Sudden and still—hurrah!
Bolt from Iberia!
Don John of Austria
Is gone by Alcalar.

Had the battle gone differently, Europe, and by extension the world, might look rather different today. I'd say we owe a vote of thanks to Don John.

God bless,

LSP 

Return of the Kentucky Goblin

A strange creature has been terrifying rural Kentucky. Described as humanoid in shape, the small creature has a bulbous white head and staring eyes. Frightened locals call it the "Kentucky Goblin."

While Goblin sightings have been reported in Kentucky since the 1950s, recent appearances indicate that the mysterious being is something more than a myth, and possibly a threat to children. 

According to one resident who has been terrorized by the Goblins:

These beings appear to be the size and stature of a small child, devoid of any facial features save for large, oily eyes and lipless mouths. They frighten my children by peering through their bedroom windows, chirping at one another. They actively attempt to enter my home in the middle of the night. Last month they took my dog.

Artist's Reconstruction of the Goblin Terrorizing a Farm

It is believed that the Kentucky Goblin lives in an abandoned mine, and the only way to get rid of the creature is to destroy the underground structure.

I believe they are coming from an abandoned mine located on the edge of my property. Though I’m armed, I’m afraid that I’m far too frightened to enter the mine by my lonesome, and cannot convince any sympathetic friends to accompany me, though I cannot blame them. I am convinced that the only answer is to collapse the mine.

The Bishop of the Episcopal Diocese of Kentucky, Terry White, is an enthusiastic supporter of gay marriage rituals. 

According to church statistics, the Diocese of Kentucky's Sunday worshiping attendance fell by a whopping 19.2% between 2003 and 2013.

Police have stated that the Goblin is an animal.

LSP

Dove Hunting

Still fortified by a lunchtime bean and brisket burrito from Karen's, I went for an evening dove hunt with GWB.

After a short walkabout in search of the avian acrobats -- there weren't any -- we set up in a treeline and waited. It was good to be out in the clean air and cool (for Texas) breeze, but where were the birds? 

Upgrade Needed

They showed up as it was starting to get dark, in something like three small waves, flying fast. Off went the guns, big excitement, and for me... a miss. GWB brought one down though, right at the end of the shoot. 

Country

So most of those dove lived to fight and fly again another day, not dissimilar to ISIS, after being "attacked" by our airforce for over a year.

Speaking of which, here's a photo of US Foreign Policy.

US Foreign Policy

Hunt on,

LSP

Poppers!

There was a feast of dove poppers last night and that was followed by steak. I count that as a success, unlike Justsin Welby's fish rig, which clearly isn't.

Fail

In other news, a Swedish lesbian bishop figure is taking the cross off one of her Stockholm churches to make Muslims feel more at home.

Dhimmwit

You couldn't make it up if you tried. Well you could, but you don't have to, because it's true.

LSP

Sunday Outlaws

Butch Cassidy in Fort Worth

Before the second Mass of the day I was talking with the MC in the sacristry, "This county has history of lawlessness and banditry. They'd drink, gamble, then shoot each other."

Aquilla. The hotel's gone now.

"I know. My sister's Grandfather-in-Law lived out by Aquilla, raising hell, 'til they hanged his partner and told him him to leave Texas, and not come back. So he went to Montana.

Billy the Kid

"I remember him. He used to sit there, with a wooden spittoon and a 6 gun, right next by."

Willie Nelson

We reflected on that, said our prayers, and worshiped God.

Have a blessed Sunday,

LSP

Obama Foreign Policy Genius

Care Barry Obama and his team of foreign policy geniuses have said that Russia's intervention in Syria will "strengthen ISIS."

How's that? You ask truculently.

By bombing them, of course.

Perhaps our airforce was too busy working on diversity quotas and trans bathrooms to do that, not that it would have helped anyway, because as everyone knows, bombing your enemy into the ground makes them stronger.

LSP

Ride the Horse, Obama Gets Spanked

You  can stare in numb amazement as Putin spanks Care Barry and US Middle Eastern foreign policy unravels like a rotten rope, or you can go for a ride. I chose the latter.

Care Barry

Some horses are hard to catch and you're exhausted before you've even tacked up. This one was easy, gentle, well mannered, no problem at all. But she wasn't used to riding out on her own, away from the herd and the safety of the barn. 

Tack Up

So what to expect. Mutiny? Outright rebellion? Spooky hi-jinx?

Russian Girls Laugh at Care Barry Getting Spanked

I needn't have worried. She moved out well enough and didn't pull any freakish stunts, beyond being a bit herd/barn sour. We ended up in a big field and opened up -- gallop! I had to hold on to my hat. Great fun.

Ride The Horse

Then we rode back as the sun was setting. Beautiful. I tell you, there's a lot worse things to do than ride in Texas.

Get ready to go as fast as you can

Your Friend,

LSP

Laser Eyes

In a serious bid to escape from the atrocious news that we're bombarded with on a daily basis, I took a picture of my laser-eyed dog.

He may or may not have a tennis ball in his mouth.

I'm going riding later.

That is all.

LSP

You Killer

Oregon. What a tragedy. Was Mercer a Muslim? We don't know, but he hated Christians and loved the IRA, strangely.

Mercer's victims, rest in peace.

LSP

Pizza, Pistols, Ammo, in Texas

Look how happy that slice of pizza is! And no wonder, he's got a couple of pistols and some ammo.

I haven't tried their pizza yet. Maybe I should.

Shoot straight,

LSP