The Pancakes

Terrifying, isn't it. That's right, the prospect of not one but two pancake suppers and such is life, here in the syrup marathon that is Shrove Tuesday Lspland.  A kind of Pre-Lenten penance if you like, but to be honest I always enjoy myself.

They're a good crew at the Missions and this year was fun, with everyone getting together to blast away at pancakes, bacon and sausage. Of course it'd mean something beyond an opportunity for church scoff if people actually fasted during Lent or at all, ever. But hardly anyone does.

Big mistake, not least because Christ himself recommends it by example and instruction, certain demons can only be cast out by prayer and fasting.

And Jesus rebuked the devil; and he departed out of him: and the child was cured from that very hour.

Then came the disciples to Jesus apart, and said, Why could not we cast him out? And Jesus said unto them, Because of your unbelief... Howbeit this kind goeth not out but by prayer and fasting. (Matt.17: 18-21)

Speaking of demons, one of them didn't get elected in 2016 and it's been howling, shrieking and gnashing its teeth ever since.

God bless,

LSP

Cops And Waiters

I was just back from breakfast with a couple of lawmen when a prominent Detroit food critic called and asked, "What's the difference between cops and waiters?" 

Resisting the urge to say "everything" I kept silent and my old friend replied into the vacuum, "Oh, I don't know. They're just putting their lives on the line at any given moment." I had to laugh, we'd been discussing LE and the Motor City's waitering scene, which my pal knows well.

Oh look, the revolution

Big city waiters and bartenders, sorry, mixologists, are often revolutionary socialists like AOC, and my breakfast friends wondered if we were wandering into trouble.

Detroit

Will all the enraged Anarcho-Marxist wait staff rise up in revolt when Orange Man Bad wins 2020 against a cast of MillSoc mountebanks, buffoons and charlatans? 

Maybe they will, and all those sustainably farm-to-table repurposed restaurant workers will throw down their plates and annoying craft cocktails to fight the Man. The new bearded plaid proletariat, sort of thing.

Good thing I've got this down vest for the new Ice Age!

Before they do, they might want to remember that one side knows how to shoot.

Cheers,

LSP

Cheer Up Sunday!

Some of the vast international readership of this popular mind blog are complaining, C'mon LSP, lighten up, it's Sunday! 

And who can blame them, it's not pleasant to be confronted with billionaire pedo Epstein on a Sunday morning. So to correct the balance here's a kitchen carbine, uplifting or what?

A bottle of wine and a .45! Now you're talkin', good times.

And look at this, a resting attack dog. 

See? Better already. In other compelling news, our military's taken some 50 tons of gold from ISIS. Ahem, a certain irregular cavalry unit's in need of funding. Over to you, RHSM.

And now everyone's happy, even though Hillary's unaccountably not in jail, we're in the midst of a new Ice Age and Epstein continues to fly the friendly skies of the New World Order in his especially cozy private jet. 

Cheers,

LSP

#UnsealEpstein

Billionaire pedophile Jeffrey Epstein is famous for the Lolita Express, underage sex trafficking and a remarkably light 2008 sentence. 

The fabulously wealthy registered sex offender was only convicted on one count of underage prostitution despite dozens of allegations and spent 13 months in a county jail, mostly on "work release" at his office and jet. 

So far so good, having a net worth of $2 billion and presidential friends obviously pays off. Then things started to get a little unglued, problem being that in 2015 Virginia Giuffre sued Epstein's socialite girlfriend, Ghislaine Maxwell, for acting as the madame/pimp of a wider international elite pedo ring.

The case was settled without trial in 2017 and so were the court records, sealed tight shut. Multiple lawsuits have been filed to unseal these records and Alan Dershowitz's lawyers, he's implicated, are doing all in their power to prevent this happening.

So what's in the sealed records that's so worth fighting for to keep sealed? What do Ghislaine Maxwell, Dershowitz, Epstein and whoever else want to keep secret. Surely not a millionaire elite pedophile sex trafficking operation.

We'll see how it plays out. In the meanwhile, according to flight records Bill Clinton flew the Lolita Express to Orgy Island 26 times. To say nothing of Prince Andrew and all the rest. Imagine, for a moment, the hygiene aboard that luxurious jet.

Let's see those records unsealed.

Out Demons Out,

LSP

Dog Hell

One of the things about God, Guns, Church and Country Life in Texas is that you're surrounded by dogs. For example, I have dog, a rescue cattle dog called Blue Terminator. He's called Blue because he's a Blue Heeler and terminates fried cherry pies with extreme prejudice. Ha, ha.

Whatever, Blue isn't the problem, pie thievery notwithstanding; he's a pretty sedate old gentleman, if fierce as a dingo when he wants to be. No, the problem's not Blue, it's the other dogs and they're everywhere. Everywhere barking psychotically, all day long. 

What happens here is that Jose parks his dog in the yard all day and all night, and the dog goes insane, inevitably. You would too if you were leashed up 24/7 in Hill County.

Now, imagine several blocks of Jose. Each Tecate Dreamer with his dog chained up outside, every animal growing increasingly crazy until fully psychotic and then, BOOM. Total, utter, canine cacophany. 

Perhaps you think this some kind of joke. It's not, it's a variant of Hell, dog Hell, and it needs harrowing, it demands a solution. Maybe the Wall will help. 

We live and hope,

LSP

Trannies Scorn Trudeau

International relations experts ran the numbers and came up with a startling conclusion, Canada's gone gay but trannies scorn its Premiere, Justine Trudeau.

Once known as a frontier spirit, strength in adversity, pioneer courage country, Canada's now famous for riding the rainbow and stroking the unicorn.

Happy times for the multi-hued Maple Leaf state, but not so much for the trannies who despise its rainbow Prime Minister. 

"So long, so log cabin," said one angry cross-dresser, noting Trudeau's reputation for novelty gay socks, being a beta cuck, and a bully.

Justine Trudeau's rainbow administration of NWO Illuminati gayness is mired in allegations of fraud, corruption, skulduggery and malfeasance, leading patriotic Canadians and transsexuals to call for his resignation as the country's leaderene.

Over the rainbow? 

Good luck, Canada,

LSP

CAPITOL HILL RATFEST

Did you watch the RATFEST on Capitol Hill today, in which a giant lying RAT testified before Congress?

The RAT was called out a couple of times for LYING, even CNN said so, which you gotta admit's saying something.

At one point the RAT was hit with a FARA criminal referral, which was pretty awesome, and a Muslim congressperson got called out for virtue signalling racism. Rashida Tlaib (D-MI) didn't like Mark Meadows presenting a woman of color as evidence against the RAT.

And so it span on, with the giant RAT accusing Trump of racism, evil, lying, racism, evil and talking to Julian Assange and being a Russian agent. The RAT didn't have any evidence, just its own RATLIKE say so. Not dissimilar, when you think about it, to the Russian Collusion investigation itself.

Apparently that's about to collapse because of a total lack of evidence, despite two years and millions of dollars spent in the effort. 

Maybe the Democrats thought they could keep the narrative going and stoke the frenzy of non-existent public outrage over a non-existent crime by exhibiting a LYING RAT before Congress.

Apparently it's the first time a person convicted of lying to Congress has been summoned to testify before Congress because, well, such a convincing witness. 

As the RAT shuffles off in handcuffs to serve time for its many crimes, the American public is rioting in the streets and demanding the impeachment of the President. Except that it isn't.

Good work, Democrats. Whatever PR firm told you to hire a GIANT RAT to boost you at the polls needs to be fired. 

In other more interesting news, a porn star who threatened to blow the lid off an international pedo ring has been found suicided and Trump's working on an historic peace deal with North Korea. 

India and Pakistan, on the other hand, are at the brink of war and everywhere you turn some tranny's beating real women at a sporting event. This seems unfair, unlike AJ's awesome appearance on Rogan, a must-see (AJ, stop interrupting...).

Whatever, here in the newsroom we deal in realpolitik and with that in mind remember, nobody likes a RAT.

Your Friend,

LSP

Drink All You Want

The last post was unsettling, so let's make it all better.

Cheers,

LSP

What Fresh Hell is This?

The Senate did not pass the Born-Alive Abortion Survivors Protection Act today, the bill failed 53-44. It would have prevented doctors from killing babies born after a failed abortion, which is apparently legal at the present time. 

Democrats were almost unanimously opposed to the law because they felt it was harmful to "womens health." Several Republicans voted with them and you can read about it here.

There's something stunning, at least to me, about such blatant and unapologetic evil. Hell, if you like, is erupting from the cracks and crevices of the ground we walk on, a ground that used to be Christian and clearly isn't anymore.

The next time someone tells you, "You don't have to be Christian to be good," refer them to the babies that are killed every day with government funding, your funding, right up to the point of birth and beyond. Then watch them twist and turn like a writhing snake in their attempt to justify this horror.

I tell you, Satan openly, brazenly stalks the land. But remember this, the gates of Hell will not prevail against the onslaught of the Church. 

About time she woke up,

LSP

Illuminati Elite Wreck Monday Fishing

Lake Whitney dam's a pretty good place to fish, unless our elite Illuminati overlords steal all the fish, like they did today.

The sun was shining, it wasn't too hot, it wasn't too cold, and the air smelled of spring and new life as the mighty Brazos stretched out into the distance, towards Waco and beyond. Beautiful, no doubt about it, but where were the fish?

Normally you can see them gliding about like submarines; not today, not a fish in sight. I cast off into the pool regardless, which had obviously suffered from some kind of failed green new deal, and guess what? Nothing.

A Typical Illuminati

No bass, no perch, no drum, no catfish, not even a gar. Nothing. They'd obviously been shipped off to China by Illuminati globalists, like all the rest of our assets. Thanks a lot, New World Order.

I reflected on the iniquity of it all in the cab of the rig and ate a fried cherry pie. It was delicious, that part of the mission was a triumph.

With this in mind, you better put the fish back, Illuminati tyrants and globalist stooge dupes of the NWO, or there'll be trouble.

Big time,

LSP

FOLLOW

@PureGodfrey

Why? Because genius.

That is all,

LSP

Love Your Enemies Sunday Sermon

Christ tells us to love our enemies instead of harboring murderous, malevolent, hate-filled rage against them.

After all, hatred, deceit, malice, wrath and all-consuming pride are hallmarks of Satan. So don't be like that, it's bad. Like spirit cooking, for example.

I know following the counsels of perfection can be hard but whoever said it'd be easy? So take heart and persevere, good wins.

Sermon over.

Light v. Dark,

LSP