Kerry Goofs. Again. Arm the Kurds

America is great and Texas is awesome, but our Secretary of State 'droid needs some tuning, because it's NWO DAARPA designed logic circuits aren't quite up to scratch.

When questioned about the U.S. non-war against the non-Islamic Islamic State, the ketchup fortune traitor-bot stated:

“If you’re more comfortable calling it a war against this enemy of Islam then please do so. We’re happy to call it that.”

Pamela Geller

So I guess we're at war with Pamela Geller. And Israel, and Christianity, and everyone else who lives in the "House of War."

Nice one, Kerry. 

Anti-Jihad

In other news, the enemy of Islam is scared of being deprived of virgins in the afterlife if they get killed by Yazidi women. There are several of these, fortunately.

Tower Hamlets?

The non-Islamic Islamic State has women fighters too.

Arm the Kurds,

LSP

It Rained

After saying Mass at one of the Missions I went out to my truck to drive back to the compound. Dark clouds had rolled in, low and thunderous. Then lightning filled the air and it began to rain. It didn't stop.

Some of you may think that this is a boring story and of little consequence. If you lived here you would not think that.

According to Reuters, a solid quarter of all Americans support secession.

Right on.

LSP

Loserheart, Jocks Bottle

The polls are in and the Scots, once known for their bravery, have voted against independence. In close-run polling, the formerly courageous Scots voted to remain subjects of the United Kingdom by a 55% -45% majority.

According to one political commentator, "The Scots evidently want to remain under the jackboot of a sinister Old Etonian cabal lead by the weirdly incompetent David Cameron."

Another pundit put it more simply, "Jocks bottle."

Good luck, Scotland.

LSP

SECEDE

"Governments derive their just powers from the consent of the governed... Whenever government becomes destructive to life, liberty, or property [i.e., the pursuit of happiness], it is the right of the people to alter or to abolish it... It is their right, it is their duty, to throw off such government, and to provide new guards for their future security." 

— American Declaration of Independence (1776)

Maybe the time has come. A lot of Scots sure seem to think so, and Spaniards, and Ukrainians and Texans, to name just a few.

What's going on, why would this be? Because our governments are so obviously beneficial to us? Like, we're getting so much benefit from Washington here in Texas.

But "what difference does it make?" Not very much if you like being ruled by Hillary Clinton and her poverty-stricken friends inside the Beltway.

Don't get me wrong, I love Great Britain and Scotland too, but my take, for what it's worth, is that Texas should hold a referendum. Run Wendy Davies and her crew of carpetbaggers out of town and confederate with the sane Western states. 

Shill

Rumours that Justin Welby, Archbishop of Canterbury, is a sock puppet controlled by a sinister Bilderberger trifecta of Soros, Buffet and Bill Gates, are true.

That is all,

LSP

Walking in Texas? Take a Gun.

They say that walking's good for you but in Texas you don't know what you'll find. 

Some Crew, All Wigged-Out In The Woods

Packs of wild dogs, turkeys, fierce hogs, maybe a dove or two and the occasional wigged-out crew of freaks, holed up in the brush, trying to "find the gig" and get back to Austin.

Mind How You Go

So I like to take a 12 gauge. 

Be safe,

LSP

Jefferts Schori, Episcopal Bishop or Two-Bit Space Alien?

Katherine Jefferts Schori is the Presiding Bishop of the Episcopal Church (TEC). But we have to ask, is Jefferts Schori a bishop, or a no-account, two-bit, space alien?

Here's what Jefferts Schori had to say about the Islamic terror attack on the World Trade Center:

"I saw a pickup truck a couple of weeks ago with a waving American flag painted on its rear window. As I walked through the parking lot, I realized there was something written on the tailgate – the word ISLAM stood out first. Finally I saw the whole sorry slogan, “everything I need to know about Islam I learned on September 11th.” How will we change hearts that seem closed to learning more about peace?

"Are we willing to recognize and then proclaim that as children of Abraham, Christians, Jews, and Muslims share that vision of a healed world that Micah paints for us?"

Here's what people in Saudi Arabia were saying:

"Then we all knew it wasn't an accident. We heard sporadic yelling in the streets and happy shouts from Saudis in our own hospital. In the terminal cancer ward, patients were hooting and screaming “Down with USA,” much to the horror of the American nurses tending them."

Maybe the Saudis weren't, you know, Muslims.

And maybe Jefferts Schori isn't "off-world."

LSP

Shoot the Red Menace

Sometimes a morning at the range involves the blast of the redoubtable Lee Enfield, or the sound and fury of a 30-06, or the explosive power of the .45. Sometimes it means hours of carbine amusement with a deadly assault rifle. All that's good and has its place but at other times I like to shoot shotgun cartridges off of a steel frame with a .22.

And that's what I did today. Lined up the Red Menace on the target frame and shot them off at around 40 yards. Then, when you've taken out the first wave, set up the fallen Reds and take them down again. Repeat at will.

Sure, it's only .22 plinking but what's wrong with that? Nothing at all and it's neat to see the targets fly up when you hit them.

So here's a tip for all you green shooters: Help combat Climate Change by recycling range trash and using your spent shotgun shells as targets.

Cheers,

LSP

Some Kind Of Sick Joke?

Here's a picture of an Episcopal priest. He lives in California. I'll leave it to you to work out whether he went to Harvard or not.

And maybe you think this is some kind of joke, like, look at this goof-off clown LSP pulled off the internet.

All real. Thanks for the tip, GWB.

God bless,

LSP

David Cameron Goes Full O-Tard

The U.K's Prime Minister, David Cameron, has gone full O-Tard, claiming that the savage Muslim terror group, the Islamic State of Iraq and Syria (ISIS), isn't Muslim.

Unh Hunh.

"They boast of their brutality; they claim to do this in the name of Islam," stated Cameron. "That is nonsense. Islam is a religion of peace. They are not Muslims, they are monsters.”

Where's all the Muslims?

Er, OK then, Dave, so what are they? Quakers?

Obey

Rumours that Mr. Cameron was seen earlier this week being walked by President Obama while wearing a poodle costume are entirely true unfounded.

Will this ever end?

LSP

I Drove to Dallas

I drove to Dallas yesterday to visit a sick man in hospital. After that I fell back to to the DFW HQ with a view to meeting up with some friends at one of the local restaurants. Nothing fancy, just a pizza (they call them "flatbreads"...) and convivial company. But no. That was apparently too much for the team, one of whom "had to go hunting" early the next day. Interesting excuse.

DFW HQ

So I stayed in, creating a powerful marketing strategy for a restaurant/food blog called Cheapskates. The byline being, "We Want Great Scoff at a Great Price."  Stay tuned.

Home Again. Note Kyptek

Then, today, it was time to get back on the road for the country. No complaints there and tomorrow's plan is simple. Say the Mass(es), chair a meeting, go for a horse ride, maybe followed by a shoot.

Golden Void

Speaking of which, I suggested that the Diocese screen potential clergy on their ability to ride and shoot. "If you can't ride, and you can't shoot, you can'get in," I told our bishop, disarmingly. He didn't say no.

I take that as a promising sign.

God bless,

LSP

Well Done, Woodentop! Or, Kerry Goofs Again.

U.S. Commander in Chief, President Barack Hussein Obama, has launched a new weapon, an artificial intelligence, (AI) in his attempt to build a coalition of allies dedicated to overthrowing the non-Islamic terror group that mistakenly calls itself the Islamic State.

The Commander

Affectionately known to its clandestine DAARPA handlers as "Woodentop", the Kerry AI is a Fast Boat Class, experimental war android.

The Android

Since arriving in Turkey to cement an alliance against the brutal non-Islamic Islamic State of Iraq and Syria (ISIS), the lantern-jawed Kerry AI has stated that fighting an anti-terrorist war against ISIS is not, in fact, a "war."

ISIS Laughs

Instead, Kerry warned that military action against the Islamists that aren't Islamists is"a very significant counterterrorism operation" that will take "some period of time" and "have many different moving parts." 

Moving Parts, Woodentop?

Whether the Kerry AI's cognitive functions are solid state or contain moving parts is classified. After listening to the experimental android's arguments, Turkey has refused to let the U.S. use its airbases to strike at ISIS targets.

Since the Kerry made its "war is not war" statements, the White House has refuted its foreign policy android by announcing that it actually is at war with ISIS.

Confused? Neither are we.

Way to go, Woodentop. 

LSP

Anniversaries

Here in this country town people mark the 9/11 attack by putting out flags in their front yards. Red, white and blue. I'd do that too, but some kids stole my flag when I wasn't looking. I'd better get another one.

Some of the flag bearers may even remember that today is the 2nd anniversary of the Benghazi massacre, in which Ambassador Stevens was killed by Islamic savages, but not before he was raped burned and tortured for seven hours. "What difference does it make?" declaimed Hillary Clinton. A fair bit, if you're Stevens or one of the former SEALS who died there too. Well done, SECSTATE Hillary.

But there's another anniversary today which almost everyone has forgotten, the lifting of the Great Siege of Malta, on September 11, 1565. Since May of that year, the Jihad forces of the Ottoman Turks had attempted to overcome the island's small Christian garrison, under the command of the Knights Hospitaller and their courageous Grand Master, Jean de Vallete. 

Thanks to the resolute defense of the Island and the timely arrival of a relief force of knights led by Don Garcia, the Jihad army was routed and fled to their ships. Less than twenty years later, in 1571, the Islamists attempted to dominate the Mediterranean again, hoping to capture Rome and from there  on, Europe itself. They were decisively defeated at Lepanto. 

Perhaps we recognize the pattern. Islam, wherever it's practiced thoroughly, is at war with us, following in the footsteps of its founder, the warlord Mohammed. 

Our President, however, appears to be in a state of denial. The Islamic State of Iraq and the Levant isn't "Islamic", he tells us. So what are they then? Methodists? Parsees?

Don't be fooled,

LSP