Friday, September 12, 2014

Well Done, Woodentop! Or, Kerry Goofs Again.

U.S. Commander in Chief, President Barack Hussein Obama, has launched a new weapon, an artificial intelligence, (AI) in his attempt to build a coalition of allies dedicated to overthrowing the non-Islamic terror group that mistakenly calls itself the Islamic State.

The Commander

Affectionately known to its clandestine DAARPA handlers as "Woodentop", the Kerry AI is a Fast Boat Class, experimental war android.

The Android

Since arriving in Turkey to cement an alliance against the brutal non-Islamic Islamic State of Iraq and Syria (ISIS), the lantern-jawed Kerry AI has stated that fighting an anti-terrorist war against ISIS is not, in fact, a "war."

ISIS Laughs

Instead, Kerry warned that military action against the Islamists that aren't Islamists is"a very significant counterterrorism operation" that will take "some period of time" and "have many different moving parts." 

Moving Parts, Woodentop?

Whether the Kerry AI's cognitive functions are solid state or contain moving parts is classified. After listening to the experimental android's arguments, Turkey has refused to let the U.S. use its airbases to strike at ISIS targets.

Since the Kerry made its "war is not war" statements, the White House has refuted its foreign policy android by announcing that it actually is at war with ISIS.

Confused? Neither are we.

Way to go, Woodentop. 



Adrienne said...

Yeah - and didn't Syria say if they bombed ISIS they would consider it an act of war?

How the hell does it come to be that Kerry, the traitor and liar, has any position in our government at all?

Don't these jerks ever go away?

Lord help us...

LSP said...

Apparently they don't -- unfortunately. And good question, how did Kerry rise to power anyway?

Oh, I remember, cash.

LL said...

LSP, he married cash after her husband, Senator Heinz, died in a mysterious airplane crash. Bonesman to the last, Kerry became Teresa Heinz personal bonesman.

Ok, so going to a foreign land and carpet bombing them isn't a war. The Battle of Britain during WW2 was technically not an act of war, nor was the US dropping 2 atomic bombs on Japan. It's clear to me now.

LSP said...

Lest we forget.

The Battle of Britain wasn't a "war" and Goering wan't a Nazi, neither.

Two ME 262s, please.

LL said...

Obama canceled the "War on Terror" when his regime took Washington DC. He called the subsequent military activity a "foreign contingency operation" so that he could end all wars...typical liberal -- It's not a war if they say it's not.

LSP said...

That's the Ministry of Truth for you.