Saturday, February 13, 2016

Don't go to a Liturgical Dance, Ride Instead

You wake up, it's a beautiful day and you think to yourself, "I know, I'll go to a liturgical dance!" Resist that temptation, and go for a ride.

Goofing Off

Liturgical Dance is goofy.

Horses Scorn Liturgical Dance

Riding is not goofy, mostly.

Bad And Weird

Liturgical Dance is bad.

Good Horse

Riding is good.

Blasphemous Nonsense

Liturgical Dance is blasphemous.

Don't go Liturgical Dancing, Fool

Riding is not.

I hope this short educational post helps all of us to keep a better, more disciplined and holy Lent. Remember, when temptation strikes, as it so often does, don't go liturgical dancing! Go for a ride instead, it's better for mind, body and spirit.

That is all.



LL said...

Here I was, all set to attend a liturgical dance event honoring Gia and watch a bunch of fat lesbians wearing comfortable shoes doing their thing, sweating like pigs as they work off those unwanted pounds, and you've talked me out of it.

I don't have horses at hand (and more's the pity) so I will take the grandkids to a Monster Truck Jam instead.

LSP said...

Thank God you saw the light, LL. And that's what this blog is about, providing sensible real-world solutions to life's problems and dilemmas.

Enjoy the Jam.

Mattexian said...

My wife watches "Bring It!" which features a studio in Jackson, MS called the Dancing Dolls. (And I have nowhere to retreat.) Last night, one of the story lines was about the head of the studio teaching her students a liturgical dance about the Crucifixion, for them to perform at a dance competition. I heard that, and just started shanking my head, muttering "No. No. No." Other storylines included one dancer's mom finally marrying her baby-daddy, after 18 years (?!?), so the other moms threw her a bachelorette party; and one dancer's father trying to put his foot down about his daughter learning these popular (read: vulgar) dance moves, preferring that she attend a ballet studio, but the girl and mom won out.

I was much relieved when the show ended and a rugby match came on. It wasn't completely wholesome, tho, as the commentator's mike picked up someone in the crowd shouting out "WTF are you doing???" a little after the twenty-minute mark. I looked over to the wife, who had an expression that she'd heard it too (she was in the Navy, I served in the State Guard, the red-headed stepchild of the Texas Military Forces, so we're not unfamiliar with using salty language), so it just surprised us for that to sneak past a mike with a delay of a few hours, plus editing, as we've never seen one of their halftime shows, however brief.

LL said...

Keeping sinners like me on the straight and narrow path is your job.

LSP said...

Rugby's a tough sport, Mattexian. I used to play when I was a kid but didn't keep it up, unlike my brother who managed to do bad damage to his knees. As for a liturgical dance Calvary... well, that's bad damage too.

LSP said...

I try, LL. It isn't always easy.

Infidel de Manahatta said...

Wasn't the "abomination of desolation" a reference to liturgical dance?

LSP said...

Oh yes, Infidel. Well spotted.