Russians Love Obama

Those mischievous Russians are at it again. Do these pranksters know no shame?!? And is it true that smoking kills more people than Obama?

Carry on,

LSP

Hillary Clinton Barks Like a Dog

Here's Hillary, barking like a dog. Please, someone, indict this creature and get it back in the 'pound.

LSP

The Gun is Not a Pet

Guns aren't pets to be looked at, stroked and patted on the head, even if you do love them. No, they're tools, machines built with a purpose and made to be used. With that in mind, a friend came over from Dallas and we drove out to the range with a truckload of guns.

A Pet

First things first, see if my pal's Remington semi .22 was dialed in. It wasn't but the scope was soon put to rights. The Ruger American was right on and the more I shoot it the more I like it. Handy little bolter.

Some Guns

An old Winchester pump .22 did just fine too, handily taking down some steel plates and a small silhouette at 100 yards. I like that gun, and there was nothing wrong with an AR, either. Well done, Spikes Tactical, Fortis, Ballistic Advantage and Primary Arms. Put the dot on the target and off you go.

Dial it In

And then there's Glock. Some people scorn them, "they're rubbish." I disagree, a right workhorse of a pistol and all business. Breathe, squeeze the trigger, take down the plate, or whatever. For some reason I shot better at 30 yards than I did at 15. Weird, but true.

Some Old Guy With a Gun(s)

We finished off by blasting a plastic water container down the range with a single shot Boita (?) .20 gauge. Big fun.

So now you know. Happy Presidents Day.

LSP

Presidents Day!

Here's a helpful infographic for Presidents Day, see if you can spot the odd men out.  While you reflect on that, ponder another mystery. Turkey's Mad Sultan, Erdogan, is shelling Syian army and Kurdish positions near Aleppo as Saudi Arabia flies planes into Incirlik for raids against Assad forces.

Some think that the Mad Sultan and his friends will invade Syria to protect their ISIS proxy army and lift the siege of Aleppo. Russia, presumably, will run away like a scolded cat.  Or, on the other hand, it will destroy the crazed Sultan's invading phalanx and shoot down Saudi Arabia's airforce. Which course of action do you think Russian President, Vladimir Putin, is most likely to take?

As this drama plays out in the hot sands of the Levant, Blue Eschaton guards the Compound against the impending apocalypse and I'm off to the range for some small arms practice.

Never trust a hippy,

LSP

Temptation in the Wilderness, Giant Donkey

In today's Gospel, Christ is tempted by Satan in the wilderness, at the peak of which he's taken to the top of a mountain and shown all the kingdoms of the world. "All this power will I give thee, and the glory of them: for that is delivered unto me; and to whomsoever I will I give it," says Satan, who continues with the proviso, "If thou therefore wilt worship me, all shall be thine."

What we see here is an inverse or anti-Sinai. On the holy mountain Moses is given the divine law, to love and worship the true God and him alone, and to love our neighbor. On the Devil's mountain we're told to worship the false God, Satan, and to indulge ourselves. The temptations begin with the latter, "Command this stone that it be made bread."

I took that as an opportunity to preach on fasting, for the first time ever, or at least for any length, and can't recall ever hearing a sermon on the subject. A serious omission; after all, if it's good enough for Christ, it's good enough for Christians, and by it we wage a kind of war against concupiscence and our disordered passions and appetites. Those of you who know what it's like in LSPland will understand that I was preaching to myself. 

After the Masses I went for a ride and one of the Troop rode a donkey, most definitely the biggest donkey I've ever seen. It was a right giant of a beast.

What a fine way to spend a Sunday afternoon.

Stay on the horse,

LSP

Follow The Unicorn

The Unicorn is a cuddly, velvety beast, full of rapturous promise and delight. "Follow me, over the rainbow of dreams," whinnies the playful creature and off we go in search of a glittering crockfull of utopia, led on by our scampering, frolicking, horned friend.

And what a crock it is. "Disband your armies and there will be no war," promises our frisky playmate; "Abolish private property and everyone will be rich!" neighs the winsome quadruped; "The more you're taxed the more prosperous you'll be," assures our plush pal with reverent surety, "It's settled science, and haven't you heard? The best thing about debt is that it never has to be repaid, ever!"

Off we go, gleefully climbing the rainbow to a paradise on earth, where Islam is a religion of peace and everyone will be able to get a sex-change gratis on the State because the Government is Your Best Friend Forever. So hand in your guns and there'll be no more crime, the Unicorn said so.

It's a beautiful dreamlike journey. But the problem with the Unicorn is that it's a sociopath nihilist with a nasty habit of destroying everything that it's drumming little hooves come into contact with, to say nothing of its horn, which invariably stabs its enchanted followers. 

Disband your armies? Too bad no one remembered to tell Hitler. Abolish private property? Go right ahead and ask a Kulak, except that you can't because the Worker's Paradise killed them all. More tax? Of course that'll make everyone richer, working on the good old principle that the less money you have the wealthier you'll become. And debt notoriously never has to be paid, unlike the Government, which never has enough. 

Still, at least you'll be free to get gender reassignment surgery while the peace-loving followers of Islam rape you in Cologne. And don't even think of trying to defend yourself because that would make you less safe, obviously.

Notice how the logic of the Unicorn produces the exact opposite of its intended result. It promises peace, freedom, prosperity and happiness for all and gives the reverse. It is a peddler of lies, warfare, tyranny, misery, hatred and destruction. 

Follow it, by all means, but ask yourself if it's really a unicorn you're chasing and not some other horned god. And when you get to the crock at the end of the rainbow, don't be surprised when you find out that it contains something other than gold.

Your Old Friend,

LSP 

Don't go to a Liturgical Dance, Ride Instead

You wake up, it's a beautiful day and you think to yourself, "I know, I'll go to a liturgical dance!" Resist that temptation, and go for a ride.

Goofing Off

Liturgical Dance is goofy.

Horses Scorn Liturgical Dance

Riding is not goofy, mostly.

Bad And Weird

Liturgical Dance is bad.

Good Horse

Riding is good.

Blasphemous Nonsense

Liturgical Dance is blasphemous.

Don't go Liturgical Dancing, Fool

Riding is not.

I hope this short educational post helps all of us to keep a better, more disciplined and holy Lent. Remember, when temptation strikes, as it so often does, don't go liturgical dancing! Go for a ride instead, it's better for mind, body and spirit.

That is all.

LSP

Satan's Storm, Kopperl Texas

Perhaps the most startling remains of the storm was in what had been the cotton patch at Pete and Inez Burns' farm. The cotton was about knee high and a 'lucious crop' the day before, according to the couple. The next morning all that was left were carbonized stalks peeping out of the ground. The corn fared little better.

That was caused by a freak storm, which broke over the small town of Kopperl, Texas, shortly after midnight on June 15, 1960. Within minutes, temperatures climbed to 140° Fahrenheit, brought on by superheated winds gusting at 75 miles per hour as a dying thunderstorm collapsed over the rural community. Locals called it Satan's Storm.

Who knows why, or on account of what wickedness, Satan was allowed to strike Kopperl and not much remains of the town today. A hardware store sits abandoned and slowly falling into ruin across from the train station, and a fire truck rusts in the morning Texan sun. All stricken, I imagined, by the superheated wind of Satan's Storm.

The town was named after Galveston railway tycoon Moritz Kopperl and founded in the 1880s as a Bosque County shipping point on the Gulf, Colorado and Santa Fe railway. At its peak in 1904 the town boasted 394 souls, it has some 200 today.

There may not be a lot to see in Kopperl and maybe there never was, but you can hear the birds sing and the air is clear.

God bless,

LSP

Country Life in Texas, Part Something or Other

Things started off well. Get up with the dawn, walk the dog, drink some coffee, say Morning Prayer and then go for a ride. That meant driving out to my friend's ranch near Aquilla and meeting up with him and two youngsters. I met them riding down the ranch road and told them I'd catch up, and that's what happened. Tack up and gallop.

As always, it was beautiful to ride out in the morning sun and I enjoyed myself weaving in and around the mesquites and going through the gaits. The kids had fun too, though at a more sedate pace. Thanks a lot, RP, for the riding hospitality.

Ride over, I stopped to get some coffee on the way home and learned that a churchperson was very sick in hospital. So I made a swift turnaround and drove to Waco, but not before taking a picture of my neighbor's peacock. It's one of several and likes to roost in the trees when not shrieking with a high and crazed insanity.

The day finished appropriately, with Stations of the Cross, and that's just the way it is.

God bless,

LSP

Berned

Go Figure.

Have a blessed Ash Wednesday,

LSP

Shrove Tuesday

As faithful Christians were gearing up for Lenten penance, Hillary Rodham Clinton was getting a shriving in New Hampshire, handily beaten by a 74 year Communist, Bernie Sanders. 

The GOP establishment took one in the face too, with celebrity real estate mogul Donald Trump dominating the Republican Party field. Sorry, bow tie and tasseled loafer brigade, you lose.

So what does it mean, we asked ourselves over pancakes at the Missions. A Bern v. Trump shoot-out for the Presidency? A return to the good old days of better dead than red or vice versa and devil take the hindmost?

One thing's sure, if the old commie keeps up at this pacemaker it's going to take a whole lot of flying monkeys to keep Hillary in the running, and out of jail.

Don't forget to go to Mass tomorrow, it's Ash Wednesday.

LSP

Scientist Unlocks Mystery of Junk DNA

Scientists have long been puzzled by what appears to be "Junk DNA" that doesn't code like normal human DNA and appears to have no real purpose. But startling new research may have found an answer, Extraterrestrials.

Sequence The Code

According to Professor Chang of the Human Genome Project, Junk DNA is evidence of an ET "programmer" who "grew" beings in the same way we grow bacteria in a Petri dish. 

“Our hypothesis is that a higher extraterrestrial life form was engaged in creating new life and planting it on various planets," stated Chang, "Earth is just one of them. Perhaps, after programming, our creators grow us the same way we grow bacteria in Petri dishes."

However, Chang believes the alien programmers' motives are unknowable, "We can’t know their motives – whether it was a scientific experiment, or a way of preparing new planets for colonization, or is it long time ongoing business of seedling life in the universe [Sic].”

Junk DNA. The accidental debris of evolution, or proof of space alien bio-engineering.

You be the judge,

LSP