Blue Friday

The Friday after Thanksgiving's famous for scenes of crazed shoppers fighting over all the made in China debris of modern life. Rather than go out in the fray we decided to emulate the feeding frenzy at home. How?

Enter one stuffy squeaking dog toy, and a voracious Heeler. Blue Friday fell onto that squeak cow like a mall full of shoppers on a cut price flatscreen.

The toy didn't have a chance. Blue Consumer was on it. Ears? Rip 'em off. Head? Tear the stuffing out of it. Body? Disembowel, and scatter the contents to the floor, growling and grunting like a Best Buy punter in search of a cheap deal.

Then, almost as fast as you can say mindless mall brawl nonsense, the fight was over and Blue Khan stood, victorious, on the battlefield. Did he expect a treat for his Blue Friday performance? Yes, of course.

Hope you all had a great Thanksgiving and manage to stay out of the store scrum today.

Cheers,

LSP

Black Friday Frenzy!

Black Friday. Here we are at one of the pyramid peak celebrations of the old lie. Viz. Buying more molded plastic and associated things will make you happy, fulfilled and rich. Being a citizen journalist, I went to Walmart to cover the story.

Mallbrawls, scrapping over flatscreens, getting into it over rollovers? No. You could've shot a canon down the aisles of cut price mammon and not hit a soul.

I walked away, as a committed Monarchist, with some eggs, carrots, bullets, a bottle of wine and pie crust pastry. It was easy, no lines.

Why the absence, had a neutron bomb gone off, were people too full to move or were they staying at home in a grass roots movement to boycott the big corp rainbow in favour of a return to the governance of Christendom?

On that theme, well done Russia, you're the one that got away from beneath the talons of the nihilist beast.

Stand.

LSP 

Archbishop Of Canterbury In Black Friday Mall Brawl

Reports are coming in from around the country that the leader of the cash-strapped Church of England, Archbishop Justin Welby, has been Black Friday mall brawling for cheap deals in a desperate attempt to fix the finances of the Anglican Communion.

Following Thanksgiving, Black Friday discounts drive shoppers into a frenzy as they compete for door buster deals, and Archbishop Justsin was no exception, fighting for bargains with thousands of other hungry shoppers.

Police broke up mall brawls in numerous locations, including Alabama, Detroit and Jersey City.  Always one to mind the bottom line, Archbishop Justsin has reportedly installed 52" flatscreens in Lambeth Palace and stocked his drawers with cut-price cotton twill Chinos.

What this means for the present day Worldwide Anglican Non Communion (WANC) is presently unclear.

Quo Vadis,

LSP

Black Friday

Being in a mood to live out my own small slice of the American Dream, I figured I'd better go out and buy something on Black Friday. I wasn't sure what to expect, maybe there'd be fierce Drudge inspired mobs of people in a shopping frenzy, getting ready to "kick off", as some of my English friends might say.

So I went to the local Dallas Best Buy to find some action and sure enough, there were plenty of people buying things. No riots though, even the cops standing guard at the door seemed full of good spirits, as were the shoppers. I tried to find a Digital Audio Converter (DAC) and failed, then browsed around the hi-fi -- audio's really moved on in the past few years, leaving me sadly out of date. Maybe I'll save up the money and upgrade the stereo, I thought to myself, and didn't buy anything.

Puchaseless, I cruised around the barrio in the truck, wondering at the Lexus in front of me. Redistribute the wealth, yo.

Hope you all had a great Thanksgiving and, of course, Feast of St. Clement.

Cheers,

LSP