Wednesday, September 20, 2017

Witches Don't Like Trump



By now everyone knows that witches and occultists in general are against President Trump. They don't like him and wish that The Old Witch had become president. That's why they keep casting spells on Trump to "bind him."

Like the Oracle of Los Angeles, who told Tucker Carlson that magic "symbolic actions" were equivalent to standing for the Star-Spangled Banner or saluting the flag.




In fairness to the Oracle, both involve symbols and both produce what the esoteric Californian calls "tangible results," but one appeals directly to supernatural force and the other doesn't.

Here's an excerpt from the Binding Spell. See if you can work out who the witches are praying to:


Hear me, oh spirits
Of Water, Earth, Fire, and Air
Heavenly hosts
Demons of the infernal realms
And spirits of the ancestors

After asking the elemental spirits, angels, demons and ancestor spirits to stop the President from doing bad things, the ritual ends with a bit of creative visualization, of Trump "blowing apart into ash." Note rubrics:

(Light the small photo of Trump from the flame of the orange candle stub and hold carefully above the ashtray)
(Speak the following loudly and with increasing passion as the photo burns to ashes)
So mote it be!
So mote it be!
So mote it be!
(Blow out orange candle, visualizing Trump blowing apart into dust or ash*)



Well that's alright then, asking spirits and demons to incinerate the President. Nothing untoward about that at all, just like saluting the flag or singing the Star-Spangled Banner; another regular day in normal America. Except it's not. 

Remember, it's all a magical life coach larf until you wake up.




And a demon's gnawing on your elbow.

LSP


8 comments:

Jules said...

Something tells me that spell might have backfired on Hillary. Not to be a bitch or anything bu twho let the wizened crone out? Sheesh! She needs a bloody good face cream. Possibly araldite and no nails.

LSP said...

That's a very good point, Jules, and you'd think that the witches would see the example of The Old Witch and stop their skulduggery. Want a face like that? Keep up the magicke.

Still, I have it on good authority that not all magical life coaches are Hillary fans.

LL said...

Hillary's persona (and face) is the result of a spell gone horribly wrong. So is her book, "What Went Wrong"

Fredd said...

Nah, Jules. The old crone's days of face cream have come and gone decades ago.

She's been using a trowel and spackle for quite awhile now. With iffy results.

Brig said...

I personally don't much care what a person looks like,
but those with evil souls I don't care to be around.

LSP said...

Karmic lashback, LL?

LSP said...

She's been trying to keep up the mask, Fredd, trowel in hand. But the flies still keep landing.

LSP said...

Brig, as the good book says, "For from within the hearts of men come evil..."