Thursday, April 23, 2015

LL Flies to Texas


Some people don't have much to say and what they do say is depressing, negative, boring and stupid. None of these things apply to LL, and I know this because he broke free of California and visited Texas this week.

The conversation was varied, ranging from drones and kukris to Atlantis, soteriology, and everything else in between. Of course most of this is classified, but not all; here's a paraphrase, as we were taking a break at the range.

  "I say, old chap," I asked, adjusting the settings of my thermal visioning monocle, "What d'ye think of Preppers?"
  "Preppers?" Growled LL, channeling General Patton, "I've always been a prepper, because I've always been prepared, but some of these guys are too narrow. Their plan lacks perspective."
  "How's that?" I replied, cutting the head off a snake with a handy, razor sharp kukri.
  "Well, I turn up at their fort with a canon, a Civil War cannon, that has a range of not much less than a mile, and I start pounding that compound with hot shot. What then? Yeah, maybe they run out, perhaps they sally forth. I want that, I want them in my kill box."
  "A Civil War cannon?"
  "Right. A Civil War cannon. Maybe a trebuchet. I could make both of them, so could you."
   "So perhaps the redoubt should be underground?"
   "Exactly."

After some ranging about we drove south to meet friendly forces. Rumors of hedgehogs are entirely without foundation.

Texas, which is perfect, is nonetheless a poorer place without LL.

God bless,

LSP 


9 comments:

LL said...

If I'd been at the Alamo, Santa Ana would have lost...

Maybe I need to move to Texas (at least part time) simply to help offset the other Californians who are moving there in an attempt to californicate the place.

LSP said...

The Alamo is a moving place. And for sure, you should set up a base here to help us interdict the rat lines out of California.

That just makes sense.

Resistor said...

Jade Helm; Texas is 'hostile state'; the mysterious LL arrives in Texas...

One must wonder if militant preacher is considered an insurgent leader over who's domain they must master.

Info Ops, Disinfo Ops, HUMINT. Let the games begin.

jenny said...

Well stated. Texas is quite heaven-like, no matter what, by definition. That said, there's now an LL-shaped hole deep in the heart of Texas!

LL needs an Alamo of his own, absolutely (even if just a part-time one).

LSP said...

Resistor, we'll all meet again on the CHISholm Trail.

Brig said...

So good to see that Texas got a little LL time.

LL said...

The Resistor doesn't understand my benign nature and how the Texans set a "killer hedgehawg" on me to remove me from the gene pool in Austin. ...you would have to have been there to have appreciated the event and the 'potential' carnage.

LSP said...

You must visit too, Brighid!

LSP said...

That was one fierce little hawg, eh?