Ukraine Magic

The news cycle moves pretty quickly these days, so perhaps everyone has forgotten about the civil war in the Ukraine. But amnesia aside, things haven't gone too well for Western backed Kiev forces, in their fight against pro-Russian separatist districts. 

Debaltsevo

In Debaltsevo alone, separatists captured 450 heavy weapons, 200 pieces of armor and 60 tanks during fighting in January and February. However, this streak of George Soros funded bad luck may be about to change.

Typical Ukrainian Shamans

Some 2000 wizards, witches, shamans and warlocks gathered in Kiev today to hold a magic ritual for peace in the troubled country and to cast spells on amulets and charms for nationalist fighters.

Sergey Grechishkin, a self-styled magician, who calls himself Sabirius and a "master of the primary circle," described the purpose of the ritual as an "appeal to higher forces."

Charging Up

“It will be a joint appeal to the higher forces. Each of us will do it in his own way. We will ask them to help people to recover from this bloody attack of anger and hatred and save those who found themselves in this wild bloodbath. The second ritual is a 'charging up' of protective amulets for the warriors and residents in the conflict zone, which will then protect people from bullets, frags, knives and batons.”

Protective amulets for the warriors? That worked well for the Sioux and the Mau Mau.

Perhaps you think I've made this up, as some kind of joke. Think again.

LSP

Iron Horse

Since this is becoming a transport focused forum, it's only fair to say that my old pal, Lukeya, isn't just keen on trains, he also likes bikes, and has a nice-as-you-like Norton Commando. 

LL has a motorcycle too, a Ducati Diavel, which some believe to be only marginally slower than chain lightning.

Fredd also had a bike, the iconic Kawasaki 750 triple, and believes that riding it was a lot like having a timber wolf, for a pet.

"So," you ask, "Where's your motorcycle, so-called 'LSP,' if that's your real name, which we doubt."

That, readers, is a very good question.

LSP

The Crying Towel

When I'm feeling pathetically sorry for myself and tempted to snivel into a crying towel, I reflect on the woman I visited in ICU this morning.

That puts things in perspective right away.

God bless,

LSP

Operation Jade Helm

It's that Operation Jade Helm time of year again, and I like nothing better than to invite some of the operators up onto the porch for coffee and easygoing talk about hunting, gear, tactics, philosophy, politics, and the state of the Anglican Non-Communion. 

Good times, and I can tell you this. They're not too thrilled at the prospect of Hillary Rodham Clinton becoming Commander-in-Chief. No sir.

Spot the Operator

But maybe that's a fading prospect, along with the chances of SCOTUS upholding what everyone has always thought obvious. Namely, that marriage is something that occurs between a man and a woman.

If they don't, as appears likely, I will disobey their law and so will the Missions.

Train hard, think positive, fight easy.

LSP

Problem? Solution #LukeyaStyle

Here at Team LSP, we like to think of ourselves as Solutions Providers. That's why we support Baltimore's recent Light Rail Initiative (LRI).

Let's have more and better trains!

Carry on,

LSP

Baltimore's New Mayor?

Perhaps all is not lost. Are we looking at the next Mayor of Baltimore? The current one is clearly useless.

More, please.

LSP

America, We Have A Problem

If anyone doubts that America has a serious problem in any one of its many urban hellholes, they should look at Baltimore.

The only question is where next. Detroit, Chicago, DC, Gary, LA, St. Louis, New York, Philadelphia? The list goes on.

In the meanwhile, the National Guard has deployed to Baltimore's Inner Harbor and elsewhere in the city. So if the purpose of yesterday's looting, arson and rioting was less aggressive policing, I'd say it scored an own goal.

You can read Freddy Gray's rap sheet here as you ponder Matt Drudge: "The country could fall."

Maybe it won't.

LSP

Cooking, With LSP

You can't cook with LSP, you mutter, darkly. Ah, but you can, and this is how it's done. Get a rifle, maybe a .270, a 30-06, or a .303, even a 5.56 will do, whatever, and go out and shoot a ferocious hog. Smaller is better.

Paint the Deck, LSP

Turn the vicious tusker into spicy sausage. That done, slice up the meat into patties and put it in a frying pan. Smile contentedly as you dial up the heat, and watch that sausage fry, filling your house with the delicious smell of sizzling wild pig.

Serve it up with eggs, any style you like, and mushrooms, or with nothing at all, there's no rule. Then say grace and eat your meal like a warrior.

And that's cooking, with...

LSP

Lebyterians Run Amok

The Lesbyterian branch of Big Gay is running amok in America, suing Christian businesses for refusing to make gay cakes and pizza.

Aaron and Melissa Klein of Sweet Cakes by Melissa were sued by Lesbyterian activists, Rachel and Laurel Bowman-Cryer, for refusing to bake them a gay wedding cake in 2013. Last Friday, an Oregon judge awarded the Lesbyterians $135,000 for "emotional distress," effectively bankrupting the Kleins, who were forced to close their business and have to pay the fine out of personal funds.

Nice Ball Cap, Rachel

Rachel and Laurel cited 88 examples of "emotional distress", including:

“acute loss of confidence,” “doubt,” “excessive sleep,” “felt mentally raped, dirty and shameful,” “high blood pressure,” “impaired digestion,” “loss of appetite,” “migraine headaches,” “pale and sick at home after work,” “resumption of smoking habit,” “shock” “stunned,” “surprise,” “uncertainty,” “weight gain” and “worry.”

Weight Gain, Laurel?

Who knows, maybe they felt so emotionally hurt that they've had to start wearing cargo shorts and ball caps. In the meanwhile, the Kleins won't have the money to pay their mortgage or feed their children, they're ruined. So much for emotional distress.

Burner

Earlier this month, an out of control Lesbyterian threatened to burn down Memories Pizza, in Indiana, for refusing to cater a gay wedding. Memories was forced to shut down for 8 days but has since reopened, unlike Sweet Cakes in Oregon, which is shut for good.

The Oregon ruling sends a powerful message to American Christians. Holding a Biblical, and up until now normative view of human sexuality, is discriminatory and punishable when deployed in the public square. At least in Oregon.

How much longer will we have to wait before the view itself is illegal thought crime?

Maybe never, because Big Gay is all about tolerance and inclusion and the rainbow colored fist of stainless steel liberal fascism.

I stand against that.

LSP

Good Shepherd Sunday

It's Good Shepherd Sunday and Bishop Iker came to the Missions to preach, celebrate the Mass and baptize. Unlike many bishops, Jack Iker is a good shepherd, who cares for the flock and protects it against the wolf.

Wolf

Who is the wolf? Satan, of course, along with his allies within and without the church, those who tear, rend and attempt to destroy the Body of Christ. People like:

"heretics, hypocrites and Lollards, who with their wretched doctrine hardly every cease to deceive the meek and the simple in the Church. Against them the faithful shepherd must fight strongly with the keenness of the words of sacred scripture and, given his pastoral staff, with the threat of censure."

Heretic

That was written in the Middle Ages but it's true today. The wretched doctrine of our contemporary heretics is in the ascendant, especially in Western Anglicanism, though no denomination is immune. 

Lesbyterian

Pray for more good shepherds, men like Bishop Iker, who will be faithful to the flock and fight against the enemy.

God bless,

LSP

Breaking -- Jenner Withdraws From Race

Belinda, formerly Bruce, Jenner has announced her/his intention to withdraw from the race to become Presiding Bishop of the Episcopal Church.

Jenner looked set to become the world's first ever openly trans bishop, but after disclosing that she/he was a Christian and a Republician, the famous athlete took its name out of the running for the tiny denomination's top job.

"Belinda was a famous athlete, who is now trans, and we welcome that," stated one cathedral canon, "But being a Christian Republican obviously disqualifies her from the position."

So who will be the next PB?

In the meanwhile, the Episcopal Church is as trans as planet Nibiru's orbit is long.

God bless,

LSP

Storm Front Trans Apocalypse

There was an eerie stillness, then the sky turned green, the wind picked up and the clouds opened to bursts of thunder, as rain lashed down onto the metrosprawl, backlit by lightning.

So what, you say. This is Texas, it's a big country and it has big weather. True, but this was especially big, with a tornado warning in effect. Perhaps the twister touched down in the merrie olde suburbs of Mansfield and Arlington. I hope not, for their sake.

We wait for reports of apocalypse, destruction and chaos, with magazines loaded, a round in the chamber, and vicious kukris honed to a razor edge. Maybe some crew of street punks will chance their luck, here at HQ. They'll wish they hadn't.

In other news, Bruce Jenner has announced his/her intention to become Presiding Bishop of the Episcopal Church and the world's first ever trans bishop.

What can we say but good luck Bruce! Anyone that says you're a freakish, blasphemous, parody of a woman is a hater. Obviously.

Carry on,

LSP