BREATH TAX

 

Tax That Terrorism

Everyone knows we're in a war, a bitter war, a vicious war, a no-holds-barred war against a ruthless enemy, the Weather. You see, what happens is this. Thanks to man-made Carbon Dioxide (CO2) emissions, fragile planet earth is shrouded in CO2 and heats up like a greenhouse, which melts the glaciers and floods Vanatu and Martha's Vineyard. Disaster.

So Not Satanic

Polar bears die, sad, and multi-million dollar mansions get washed away in the flood of rising sea water, tragic. Awful, and it's all down to Carbon Dioxide being spewed out by us, humans. So to save the planet we must stamp out Carbon Dioxide. Yes, you may even have heard the slogan, NET ZERO. That means no more. Absolutely zero CO2. The venerable if shrinking Church of England's all in favor of this, obviously, but here's the thing.

Note Bear

Humans produce CO2, Carbon Dioxide, it's a function of breathing, and accounts for 0.1% of the UK's Gaia destroying carbon emissions says the Sceptered Isle's Daily Mail. This is a problem, to put it mildly. Here at the Compound we propose a solution, tax the air. Here's a song:

On topic, don't you think?

LSP

Hillary Clinton, Pantsuit Demon

If you Google "Hillary Clinton Pantsuit" you get 487,000 results. Quite a few, and there she is, grinning at you, like a millionaire socialist who's getting ready to privatise the air.

Then, if you Google "Hillary Clinton Pantsuit Demon" you get 534,000 results and a different picture emerges.

Pretty scary, eh? 

Do the math.

LSP

The Old Boot

The political analogue to Martha Stewart, only way more wicked, is popularly known as The Old Boot. Rumors abound that the FBI's looking for an indictment and that too big to jail isn't going to cut it this time.

A Flying Monkey

It's possible that The Old Boot will be brought before justice around Easter, maybe before, like on Good Friday. That would be especially appropriate.

A Typical Pair of Tasseled Loafers

In the meanwhile, inside-the-beltway gravy-trainers are looking down the barrel of "you're fired."

I like both of the above scenarios.

LSP