Wednesday, June 3, 2015

Shock Poll, Church of England Loses Members as ISIS Laughs


Shocking new figures show that the numbers thin but buildings rich Church of England lost 1.7 million members between 2012 and 2014. During the same time, the Religion of Peace has gained 900,000 adherents.



Cof E traditionalists argue that the crisis-level decline is due to the small denomination's desperate bid to gain popularity by turning churches into mosques for a day, encouraging transsexual naming ceremonies, making women bishops and "going goddess."



What's gone wrong? Everyone knows that trans advocacy, women bishops and praying to Gaia are big crowd pullers. And turning your church into a mosque is guaranteed to fill those empty pews!



With Muslims.

ISIS laughs.

LSP

4 comments:

LL said...

I think the plan to convert C of E churches into gender transformation centers or mosques makes some sense until the Islamic population in England gets large enough that they simply decide to behead all of the trannys and homosexuals and they they will seize the gender transformation centers and make them mosques...which means that C of E will lose out on the profit from selling the buildings to the Muslims.

I offer a scenario. Transform all of the C of E churches into gender transformation centers. Hire Bruce/Catlin Jenner to be the spokesperson. Make a boat load of money turning women into men and men into women. THEN sell them all to the Muslims to be turned into mosques and make a run for Switzerland.

LL said...

P. S. C of E should hire me as a consultant.

LL said...

There is no deeper degradation imaginable than to turn a man's most intimate and sacred relation with the opposite sex into something trivial, or man-made, or an article of commerce or a pastime. That the postmodern C of E should embrace these abominations with such unabashed glee and zeal in other days would be cause for banishment, exile or even execution. It calls into question the worth the culture and the institution.Though I am not the Judge, Daniel 5:27 comes to mind: "you (C of E) have been weighed in the balances and found wanting."

LSP said...

"There is no deeper degradation imaginable than to turn a man's most intimate and sacred relation with the opposite sex into something trivial, or man-made, or an article of commerce or a pastime."

Well said.

Mene, mene...