The Search For Extraterrestrial Intelligence

As reported by Virtual Mirage, the Search For Extraterrestrial Intelligence (SETI) has so far drawn a blank, disappointing xenologists and alien enthusiasts everywhere. But this may be about to change, thanks to a startling discovery by Chinese astronomers.

Baffled Chinese boffins have detected mysterious signals from a source 3 billion light years from earth. Known as Fast Radio Bursts (FRB), the enigmatic signals were picked up on the Celestial Kingdom's giant  Five-hundred-meter Aperture Spherical Radio Telescope (FAST). 

Off-World

However,  the signals so far remain unintelligible although one star gazer has wondered if FRBs are "deliberate wails" from space alien societies.

Enigma

"Are these some new cosmic phenomenon, an odd habit of nature that we never knew? Or could they be the deliberate wails of societies howling from the farthest corners of space?" questioned Senior Astronomer Seth Shostak.

An odd habit of nature, so much white noise from the icy void of deep space, or howling signals from an alien race?

You be the judge,

LSP

They're Not Saying It's Aliens

But they're not saying it isn't, either, which is why ET boffins at SETI (Search for Extraterrestrial Intelligence) are tuning their telescopes onto a mysterious signal coming from a star in the Hercules constellation, HD 164595.

A tentative translation of the signal reads:

"I don't have a good answer to it. If we were the only Church here and [there were] no other Churches, and if division didn't matter it would be much easier to answer. We were traditionalist, then we were vicious. Now we just look odd."

The stargazing scientists who discovered the strange signal, led by Nikolai Bursov of the Russian Academy of Sciences’ Special Astrophysical Observatory, think that HD 164595 is as a good candidate for SETI investigation as any. “Permanent monitoring of this target is needed,” they say.

Others discount the signal as "meaningless gibberish."

"It's just stray signals being microlensed by the star's gravitational pull," said one SETI source, "They don't mean anything, it's meaningless gibberish."

Justin Welby, who is known on social media as the Deputy Anti-Christ, was unavailable for comment.

To the Stars,

LSP