Showing posts with label Rachel Treweek Diocese of Gloucester. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Rachel Treweek Diocese of Gloucester. Show all posts

Thursday, August 25, 2016

Lena Dunham Launches Womyn Bishop Lingerie Line

Clay Golem

Popular body positive TV star, Lena Dunham, has launched a controversial lingerie line for women bishops.


Womyn Bishop

Labelled "Lonely," Dunham describes the racy underwear as a "love letter to yourself" and refused to have images of herself promoting the lingerie in Brooklyn photoshopped, so that womyn bishops would feel empowered about their bodies.


At Last!

But will cash-strapped prelates be able to afford Dunham's upscale boudoir wear? Not to worry, Lonely retails at a price even penny pinching Church of England bishops can afford, $60.


Justsin Welby

Lena Dunham is a wealthy celebrity socialist with an estimated net worth of $12 million. When asked whether Lambeth Palace endorsed Lonely, Old Etonian, Justsin Welby, declined to comment.

Cantaur,

LSP

Monday, October 26, 2015

The Curse of the Diocese of Gloucester


The Diocese of Gloucester labours under an ancient curse, a curse that some say goes back to Gloucester cathedral's ill-fated Dean, William Laud, in the seventeenth century. However, though centuries old, the curse is apparently active today and seems to be claiming a new victim, bishop figure Rachel Treweek.

About to be installed as a member of England's ruling elite aristocracy in the House of Lords, Treweek told the public that she no longer prays to God as "he," although she sometimes forgets.



According to the UK's Guardian, "She personally prefers to say neither 'he' nor 'she', but 'God'. 'Sometimes I lapse, but I try not to.'"

Well that's great. Mawkish forgetfulness aside, God is a perfect spirit and therefore beyond gender; like time itself, God transcends it. But here's the thing, Christianity believes that this transcendent Being, the perfect, necessary source of all being, is revealed in masculine terms. 



Jesus, the eternal Word made Flesh, is notoriously a man, who teaches his followers to pray to God as Father. The Church, for St. Paul, echoing the Old Testament, is the Bride of Christ. 

Mary Domus Aurea

In brief, God, for Christians, reveals himself in masculine terms. Take it or leave it, hate it or love it, that's Christianity.

Welcome to Goof Squad

Rachel, who has been promoted to one of the declining Church of England's top jobs, albeit cursed, has chosen to leave it, at least as far as God's revelation of himself is concerned. Where does this leave her?

Note Killing Rod Through Backs of Children

Hint, not praying to the being revealed by Christ as Father. And remember, it's all a larf until the horned god claims its own.

LSP