Showing posts with label Anglican nonsense. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Anglican nonsense. Show all posts

Friday, May 24, 2013

Lift Up Your Hearts!


Joy!!

The news hasn't been good. The Religion of Peace is acting with characteristic savagery, the Administration stonewalls, lies and bullies, ammo's too expensive or unavailable altogether and we're being smitten by a plague of tornadoes. Oh, I almost forgot! Mainstream Anglicanism in the West has become a sort transsexual pantomime.

Really?


So here's a version of the Lord's Prayer to lift the spirits and get everyone closer to the goddess.

Our mother who art in earth 
hallowed be thy creation 
shekinah come 
indwell wisdom 
within this mortal person 

you give us this day 
our daily cup 
attend our deepest wounds 
for we are called to birth life anew 

tempt us with your beauty 
to pursue your desire 
and deliver us from all slavery 
present this hour 

for thine is the drink of passion 
that nursed a manger baby 
great found of mystery 
spring 

now and forever, amen.

Toothsome...

Pretty neat, eh? Here's some more. It's a form of intercession to be used at a women's Eucharist. 

"Sophia Wisdom: Our world community today, broken, unhealed and full of suffering, cries out for women's voices and leadership. We need women priests...to witness daily for nonviolence in a world gone mad with the power of weapons and guns and greed. 

Getting rid of the guns and greed


We need women priests...to put their bodies on the line and witness to the Powers that Be to stop bloodshed. We need women priests...to name our government's squandering of the people's money. We need women priests...to call our government, church, and all institutions to transparency, conversion, and accountability. 


Wall Street Trembles

We need women priests...to speak up to the government and voice the basic needs of the grassroots -- which have gone unmet for so long. We need women priests...to preach the Good News to the poor, the oppressed and exploited, and to empower them mightily. 

Afflicting the Rich

We need women priests...to boldly proclaim the Gospel so that it afflicts the rich and comfortable -- who need shaking up. We need women priests...to name the injustices-which are many-that take us away from the fullness of our humanity. 

We Demand Respect!

We need women priests...to demand respect for our Earth and her life-giving waters. We need women priests...to restore us and our lives to wholeness/holiness-and to recreate us as community."

You Clowns

What a gang of clowns.

LSP

Friday, May 6, 2011

Bearded Goof.

Some people aren't very happy about the OBL's recent send-off to the land of "dark-eyed houris", including the drearily predictable Rowan Williams, leader of the worldwide Anglican non-Communion. He's "uncomfortable" with SEAL Team 6 and their version of justice.

"I don't know full details any more than anyone else does, but I do believe that in such circumstances... it is important that justice is seen to be observed."

"Justice observed"? Do you mean to say that perhaps it wasn't?
 
Christina Odone sums it up neatly in the Telegraph, "Archbishop Williams... is dead wrong."

So was OBL, but in the meanwhile, the excellent Anglican Samizdat recommends "Devgru" take Rowan along  as an embedded tactical adviser on future missions.

I'll leave that disturbing scenario to your imaginations.

Cheers,

LSP

Tuesday, January 25, 2011

Oh Dear.

Diocese of London

A UK member of the LSP research team managed to take some time off from Kandahar to send in this curious tale, from London's Evening Standard. Here's a quote:

"The Rev David Gilmore, rector of St Anne's Anglican Church in Soho, was removed from office a week before Christmas after church authorities received complaints.

Mr Gilmore, 40, who is gay, agreed to let two members of the Armed Forces stay at the rectory after a servicemen's gay rights conference in December 2009. The 30-year-old RAF member and a sailor aged 20, referred to as A and B, claimed Mr Gilmore plied them with wine and engaged in 'lurid' conversations, including details of his sexual conquests. They told the panel he made it clear they 'were not the first people he had tried to sexually lure, that he had never had a sailor before but soldiers were fun, and that he offered B to come and sleep with him in his bed'". 

But that wasn't the problem. No. It was Gilmore visiting the 'guestroom' the next morning without any clothes on. That did it for the mysterious 'A and B' who went to 'church authorities' in the diocese of London.

You just couldn't make this stuff up, except perhaps, sadly, you could.

LSP

Wednesday, September 29, 2010

Anglican Church of Canada - Spotted!

The elusive Anglican Church Church of Canada (ACoC) has been spotted, this time over Nowra, Australia.

Appearing to be little larger than a brightly lit soccer ball, the diminutive Church was seen to hover briefly over streetlights before vanishing into the night sky.

Pundits predict that ACoC has resumed its earlier trajectory beyond earth orbit, though some experts believe that the Nowra sighting was a preliminary to a long awaited "full disclosure event."

ACoC's Archbishop, The Rt. Rev. "Fred" Hiltz was unavailable for comment.

Ad Astra,

LSP

PS. Some readers of this blog believe I've galloped through a barn. This is untrue.