Monday, August 4, 2014

Archbishop of Canterbury, Wire Guided Android?


Speculation is building that the Archbishop of Canterbury, Justin Welby, who is known as "Dobby", may be a guide-by-wire android.

Proof emerged during Dobby's tour to South Africa, where observers spotted a wire protruding from the back of the Archbishop's head. Previously considered a stand-alone, autonomous Artificial Intelligence (AI), it now appears that the Canterbury Class Churchbot is controlled.

Wire Guided

"All this time I thought of Dobby as sort of an autonomous evil droid - like the sorts on Star Wars. Sure, the Dark Side of the Force controlled him, but now this new revelation that he's wire guided. It's disturbing," stated a U.S. defense systems expert.

Droid

If true, the implications are worrying. What outside power is controlling the Dobby 'droid, and why? Who is at the other end of the wire; God, or something else?

LSP


11 comments:

jenny said...

I'm no expert on droids or Dobby. But in a goodhearted effort to help, I looked through some archives. You might check here for clues:
http://www.virtueonline.org/uk-cameron-keen-hurry-decision-over-new-archbishop

The man in black with an earpiece and a rod attached to Welby's head could be a critical lead? As could the information about Welby's involvement in the oil industry.

Best of luck in getting to the bottom of it. We're all counting on you.

LL said...

We need to set up an electromagnetic pulse in the neighborhood to disable the circuitry. Sadly even giving Dobby a sock after that may not bring him back.

LSP said...

The black robed rod handler is a sure give away.

We'll keep digging.

LSP said...

A quick EMP might be the only way forward, but let's not underestimate the power of the sock.

Euripides said...

EMPs are too expensive to set up. I'd suggest a simple pair of wire cutters.

LSP said...

Keep it simple! Good call, Euripides.

Euripides said...

That's too easy....Maybe rocket-launched wire cutters with laser sighting?

jenny said...

From a spectator's vantage point, I vote for the rocket launched snips with lasers. Perhaps with LL's flying puck as back up? But then, I tend to go for flashy things. It's not always the best option.

Borepatch said...

Throw your sock at him. ;-)

Can I just say, LSP, how much I enjoy these sorts of posts that you put up?

LSP said...

Lot of mileage in those pucks.

LSP said...

I'm afraid it'd only add fuel to the fire. But, nothing quite like a Dobby post to lift the spirits!