Sunday, December 30, 2012

Bye Bye.


The hugely popular CNN host, Piers "Loser" Morgan, is threatening to leave America if we don't ban guns. Off you go then, and England, I hope you dodge the bullet.

Shoot straight.


Saturday, December 29, 2012

Put out More Flags

I enjoy seeing the Union Jack flying in this city almost as much as I scorn Piers Morgan's theology. Everyone's least favorite Bilderberger sycophant has been running around telling us that we need to change the Bible to allow "gay marriage."

Moral? Not everything that comes out of Great Britain is worth a damn keeping.

Salute the flag.



Golden Void

It's that time of year again, the time to pack up the carry on and brave the unpleasantness of air travel and head to the frozen North. To the oil and gas boom-town that is Calgary. Being a creature of tradition I checked into the downtown Hyatt, where they put me on successively higher floors with each visit. 

Living in a High Rise

I've reached the 19th Floor, which says something about the benefits of hotel seniority and affords a good view of downtown along with a glimpse of the Rockies. It's close to the pool and steam room too. Sweat out those toxins, LSP!

I like the Hyatt, obviously, or I wouldn't stay there, and I enjoy strolling down prosperous Stephen Avenue, with its pubs, restaurants and shops. 

Seventh Second of Forever

Local legend has it that you can walk down Stephen Avenue in the summer with a stack of resumes, handing them out as you pass along, and by the time you've reached the end of the road you'll have a job. A reasonably well paid one too, but before you get too excited, remember that Calgary's expensive, so you'll need that extra cash.

Quark Strangeness and Harm

Speaking of which, I wasted no time getting out of dodgy Greenbacks and into a good position with Canadian Dollars. These, despite being part made of transparent plastic (?) are still worth something.

Hall of the Mountain Grill

More from the Frontier as the news comes in.

Rule Britannia,


Wednesday, December 26, 2012

Extradite Piers Morgan!


After a year of energetic campaigning, Team LSP is pleased to note that the popular movement to extradite Piers Morgan is gaining traction. Thanks to our friends over at Infowars, the petition to send the low-rating CNN host back to the U.K. has over 70,000 signatures and climbing. We urge you to sign the petition here.

truly appalling
As predicted by ZeroHedge, worried U.K. citizens weren't far behind, launching a counter-petition to keep Piers "Hacker" Morgan in in the U.S. 

Naomi, that's just nasty

The petition states, with some justice:

"We got rid of him once and why should we have to suffer again. The Americans wanted him so they should put up with him. We washed our hands of him a long time ago."

go on, Jeremy, punch him out

After considerable  soul-searching, we have to admit that Great Britain suffered the Illuminati posturing of New World Order shill Piers Morgan for long enough. England doesn't want him back and America can no longer tolerate his subversion of our way of life. He has to go. But where?

Cuba. We have a jail there.

Blessed Feast of St. Stephen.


Tuesday, December 25, 2012

Christmas Day

But what's this? Rain!

Woke up to the sound of roosters crowing but only just because they were nearly drowned out by the noise of thunder, lightning and torrential rain. Those of you who are familiar with Texas will know how exciting that last part is. We don't get "sky water" very often, altogether different from, say, Wales, or Oxford. 

Just some guns and a cloak of invisibility

Off to the Dallas compound now. Have a blessed Christmas and hope like fury that Santa gives you an "assault rifle" and a "deadly" handgun before our caring friend, the State, bans them.

Extradite Piers Morgan,


Merry Christmas!

A strange thing happened after saying the first Mass of the evening. I went to visit a parishioner's friend, just to say a cheery Merry Christmas and she asked: 

"Where are you from?"
"England," I replied.
"Yes, I can see that. But where from?"
"I love London. My friends say 'where do you stay when you go to Europe?' I tell them 'London, of course, it is the best of those cities.'"

I agreed because I was being polite and thought she was right. But where did she stay when she went to "Town"? She liked the Dorchester, understandably, and I told her that I saw Mr. Cash there once, in the restaurant. He was wearing black, predictably. She liked that and told me a story about a Roman Catholic priest who took his dogs to Mass.

Nothing too weird abut that, you think. Just another snobby LSP conversation. But not so fast. As I was leaving, my friend showed me the garage, which was large. And just as well, because it held about as many vintage Rolls Royce motor cars as I've ever seen. A lot, and all of them immaculate.

This happened in Slap-Out Texas, aka Hubbard. 

Who knew?

Merry Christmas,


Friday, December 21, 2012

Mystic Tamale Perfection

The Shaman

Last night I had the best tamale ever and I don't say that lightly. But don't take my word for it, here's my philisophical friend GWB's take:

If you don't like tamales, you might be a hippy, a devil worshipper, or a Democrat. Or you may never have had Oso's tamales. Oso means "bear" in Spanish, and this bear has had a storied career as a pugilist in Mexico and a barback in some of Dallas's best speakeasies. But now he has reached the apogee of his evolution and has become a maker of tamales. His tamales induce a clarity of vision and purpose in the diner, a steely-eyed resolve to meet life's challenges, and a sense of hopeful expectation about the future of humanity. They are mystic perfection and look like this.


Happy Advent,


If you're in Dallas and fortunate, or maybe worthy enough to be presented with one of Oso's tamales -- do not, do not, scorn the offer. LSP



Expecting the worst, I stepped out on the front porch to face our collective Long Count doom. Lacking  dispensation from proper ecclesial authority I wasn't armed. Then I heard it, a gentle clucking; the chickens were loose.


In related news, Senator John "Swiftboat" Kerry looks set to become Secretary of State.

Preppers? Vindicated.


Return To Sender

I haven't commented on the recent shooting tragedy, except to urge your prayers for its victims, but I will say this.

Please, someone, anyone, for all our sakes...

Send. Him. Back.

That is all.


Monday, December 17, 2012

Man Down

When a priest dies you hold a Requiem Mass, Pontifical if possible, but there's a "pre-funeral" rite before that. A group of clergy meets at the funeral home where the body is laid out. They recite various prayers, including the Litany of the Dead and the Absolution of the Dead. The body is then washed, after which a priest recites psalms, beginning at the 1st, while his colleagues clothe the body in Mass vestments. When this is done, all recite Psalms 147-150 and conclude the ritual. Preferably this should end with the coffin being sealed and brought to the church for a Vigil service. The Requiem follows on the next day.

I did that on Friday, along with two others and in case any of you are planning on doing this any time soon, I'd recommend four persons; three to vest the body and one to act as Officiant.


Please pray for the repose of the soul of Fr. J.R. Baker SSC and, of course, the victims of the shooting in Connecticut.



Tuesday, December 11, 2012

The Russian Bear

Make of this picture what you will. It's from Russia, obviously.


Climate Change

well are you going to ride or not?!

Today, in Texas, the climate changed. There was a frost! Remarkable. Perhaps it was due to global warming, caused by the warmist establishment's furiously overheating computers. 

air pollution

Possibly it was down to the friction of hot money passing through corrupt hands. Who knows, it could be brought on by Solar Flares and "bush fires" in Washington State, or Planet X and the improbably named Anunnaki. Maybe all of those things.

anunnaki demon creature fighting off a couple of sumerians

But one thing's for sure, we need rain here, and I look at the dust being driven by the wind and think apocalypse. What if the dust just caught fire

woe to the inhabitants of Jerusalem

That would be the Second Advent.