Fruit of Kaboom

From Feed Your ADHD - thanks Snarky.

Guns and horses next.

LSP

Happy Epiphany

A blessed Feast of the Epiphany to all; I like this, from the Old Rite (translation by Rorate Caeli):

Accept, O holy Father, from me, thine unworthy servant, these gifts which I offer in humility to the honour of thy holy name and to thy peerless majesty; as thou didst accept the sacrifice of the just Abel and the same gifts from the hands of the Magi.

Creatures of gold, incense, and myrrh, I exorcise you by the Father + almighty, by Jesus + Christ, His Only-Begotten Son, and by the Holy+ Spirit, the Paraclete, that freed from all deceit, evil, and cunning of the devil, you may be a saving remedy to men against the snares of the enemy. May trustful souls who use you in their homes or about their persons be delivered from danger to soul and body, rejoicing in the possession of every good; through our Lord and Saviour's power and merits, through the intercession of Mary, most holy Virgin Mother of God, of all Saints and of them who on this day venerated Christ, the Lord with similar gifts. R. Amen.

O God, thou the invisible and unending One, in the holy and awesome name of thy Son graciously bestow blessing + and power upon these creatures, gold, incense, and myrrh. Protect them who will have them in their possession from illness, injury, and danger to body and soul, so they can joyously and securely serve thee with zeal in thy Church. Who in perfect Trinity livest and reignest, God, for ever and ever. R Amen.

God bless,

LSP

PS. Check out the All Seeing Eye's comments on 'climate refugees', an, er, epiphany - for me, anyway.

All Saints Bombplot

'Holy Martyr' - Almost

I’d like to say I made the following All Saints Day liturgy up but I didn’t, its real, as reported by Virtueonline from an Episcopalian (TEC) church in Arkansas. Here’s a snapshot:

CELEBRANT: Blessed are all you holy ones, the saints, you who have done the will of God, and now rejoice in the reward of Eternal joy.

Holy men and women who worshipped the All Holy One as Rama, Vishnu or the Lord Krishna, forest hermits, ascetics and wise ones whose lives were incarnations of the holy books the Vedas, Upanishads and Gita -

ALL: All you Hindu saints; we praise you for holy are you.

The Incas and Aztecs get a look in too:

CELEBRANT: All you Incas of Peru, holy Mayans and Aztecs of Mexico, all you Native children of the sun and stars, you who with creative love and sacrifice raised up wondrous temples to your God…

Moslems also find their place in the liturgical sun:

CELEBRANT: Holy prophet Mohammed and all holy saints of Islam, all who surrender to the will of Allah: Holy Martyrs of Islam, who with your lives declared the Allah is One and only One, all you whirling dervishes and mystic Sufis, you ecstatic lovers of the divine Beloved.

With all due respect for the genius of Arkansas Episcopalianism, it has to be said that the above ritual isn’t original but sprang from the mind of a Roman Catholic priest, Fr. Edward Hays. You can find it in his aptly titled tome, “Psalms for Zero Gravity”, published by Ave Maria Press. There you have it, along with the tacit assumption that all religions are basically the same and, you know, if only we’d respect each other there’d be no more war.

It’s a pleasant thought, after all, who wants conflict, religious or otherwise? But the problem here, contrary to modern myth, is that all religions are not the same. Taking the order of Fr. Hays’ litany: the Hindu goddess Kali is represented wearing a garland of fifty two skulls, a skirt made out of dismembered arms and in two of her hands she holds a sword and a severed head, dripping blood. Anyone might be forgiven for thinking that Kali has something to do with human sacrifice, and they’d be right. According to Alex Perry, reporting for Time in 2002:

“The following month, police dug up the remains of two sisters, aged 18 and 13, in Bihar, dismembered with a ceremonial sword and offered to Kali by their father. Last week on the outskirts of Bombay, maize seller Anil Lakshmikant Singh, 33, beheaded his neighbor's nine-year-old son to save his marriage on the advice of a tantric. Said Singh: He promised that a human sacrifice would end all my miseries."

There’s more, but I’ll spare you the grisly details; suffice to say, the Hindu Kali cult isn’t nice and the British did a good thing in stamping out its holy adherents, the Thugs, who used to sacrifice some 20,000 people a year to their goddess. That was back in the 1820s, evidently the cult’s made a come-back; "for holy are you"? I don't think so.

But what about the “holy Mayans, Incas and Aztecs” whose “creative love and sacrifice raised up wondrous temples”? Well, “sacrifice” is about right because that’s what many of the temples were for, human sacrifice. Bernal Diaz, one of Cortez’s lieutenants, gives us a first-hand account of the great temple in Mexico City, Tenochtitlán:

“There were some smoking braziers of their incense, which they call copal, in which they were burning the hearts of three Indians whom they had sacrificed that day; and all the walls of that shrine were so splashed and caked with blood that they and the floor too were black…”

The Spaniards recount that the walls of the “wondrous temple” ran with blood, a sight so appalling that even the bloodthirsty Cortez himself ordered them cleaned before negotiating with and finally killing the last Inca ruler, Atahualpa.

Last but not least we have the “holy prophet Mohammed” and the “holy Martyrs of Islam”. Perhaps Fr. Hays and his Arkansas friend are unaware that Mohammed was a warrior, some would say a warlord. Does that make him holy? Well, in the eyes of Islam those who die fighting for the Prophet’s cause rank as Martyrs, with a guaranteed place in a heaven populated by dark eyed houris. This would include today’s suicide bombers. Nasra Hassan, writing for the Times, interviewed one:

“How did you feel when you heard that you’d been selected for martyrdom?” I asked.

“It’s as if a very high, impenetrable wall separated you from Paradise or Hell,” he said. “Allah has promised one or the other to his creatures. So, by pressing the detonator, you can immediately open the door to Paradise — it is the shortest path to Heaven.”

“What is the attraction of martyrdom?” I asked.

“The power of the spirit pulls us upward… We were floating, swimming, in the feeling that we were about to enter eternity. We had no doubts. We made an oath on the Koran, in the presence of Allah — a pledge not to waver. This jihad pledge is called bayt al-ridwan, after the garden in Paradise that is reserved for the prophets and the martyrs… All martyrdom operations, if done for Allah’s sake, hurt less than a gnat’s bite!”

I’d say that the martyrdom of pressing the detonator is rather different from that aspired to by Christians, but don’t let that stop you, go ahead and call these operators holy. Just be sure that they don’t waver and neither, in the end, can we.

Just a thought.

LSP

Good Children Bad President

Many thanks to The Fact Compiler for pointing out this post on the

excellent Hermeneutic of Continuity blog. Here's the transcript in

full, (Hermeneutic's commentary in brackets) :

THE PRESIDENT: I think one thing that's important to remember is that, even though there's a lot of fun at Christmas, you know, you got -- especially when it's snowy like this, so it's pretty outside, you got the Christmas tree, you got the Christmas cookies, you've got presents. You know, I think that the most important thing is just to remember why we celebrate Christmas. [You're on dangerous ground there, Mr President. One of those children just might know.]

CHILD: I know! [Oh! Here it comes!]

THE PRESIDENT: Do you know? [Nail-biting moment...]

CHILD: The birth of baby Jesus. [Aaargh - that's not in the script! The White House only just about allowed the Christmas crib this year.]

THE PRESIDENT: The birth of baby Jesus, and what he symbolizes ["what he symbolizes"? - I'm not sure the children are going to follow this] for people all around the world is the possibility of peace and people treating each other with respect. And so I just hope that spirit of giving [Shifting onto safer ground here - "peace, respect, spirit of giving" and all that.] that's so important at Christmas, I hope all of you guys remember that as well. You know, it's not just about getting gifts but it's also doing something for other people. So being nice [Oh yes! Being nice is good] to your mom and dad and grandma and aunties and showing respect [Yep, that too - nobody can argue with showing respect] to people -- that's really important too, that's part of the Christmas spirit, don't you think? Do you agree with me?

CHILDREN: Yes. [They're nice children and they show respect; but they also have this darned knowledge of the Christian faith...]

THE PRESIDENT: You do? Do you have an interesting observation? [This child was waving frantically - always a warning sign.]

CHILD: I know why we give gifts to other people.

THE PRESIDENT: Why is that?

CHILD: Because the three wise men gave gifts to baby Jesus. [Aaaargh! - the child has gone back to the gospel again!]

THE PRESIDENT: That's exactly right. [Cool - always affirm the answer even if you think it is wrong.] But [Not so cool to come in so abruptly with the "but"] the three wise men -- the reason -- (sign falls off wall) -- uh-oh, I thought that was the cookies going down. We couldn't have that. You know, the three wise men, if you think about it, here are these guys, they have all this money, they've got all this wealth and power, [Oh yeah? Or were they just Persian priest astronomers? Neat link in to the socialist agenda, though.] and yet they took a long trip to a manger just to see a little baby. And it just shows you that just because you're powerful or you're wealthy, that's not what's important. What's important is what's -- the kind of spirit you have.

So I hope everybody has a spirit of kindness and thoughtfulness, and everybody is really thinking about how can they do for other people -- treating them well, because that's really the spirit of Christmas. [and that's got it all dumbed down nicely Mr President. Forget the divinity of Christ, the incarnation, the redemption of the human race from sin - kindness, thoughfulness, niceness and nonrespectfulnesslessness will do fine.]

God bless,

LSP

Late Christmas Message

I know this is old but I liked it; from Ben Stein on CBS:

"I am a Jew, and every single one of my ancestors was Jewish And it does not bother me even a little bit when people call those beautiful lit up, bejeweled trees, Christmas trees. I don't feel threatened. I don't feel discriminated against. That's what they are, Christmas trees…

I don't like getting pushed around for being a Jew, and I don't think Christians like getting pushed around for being Christians. I think people who believe in God are sick and tired of getting pushed around, period. I have no idea where the concept came from, that America is an explicitly atheist country. I can't find it in the Constitution and I don't like it being shoved down my throat…

In light of recent events... terrorists attack, school shootings, etc. I think it started when Madeleine Murray O'Hare (she was murdered, her body found a few years ago) complained she didn't want prayer in our schools, and we said OK. Then someone said you better not read the Bible in school. The Bible says thou shalt not kill; thou shalt not steal, and love your neighbor as yourself. And we said OK.

Then Dr. Benjamin Spock said we shouldn't spank our children when they misbehave, because their little personalities would be warped and we might damage their self-esteem (Dr. Spock's son committed suicide). We said an expert should know what he's talking about. And we said okay.

Now we're asking ourselves why our children have no conscience, why they don't know right from wrong, and why it doesn't bother them to kill strangers, their classmates, and themselves…

Funny how simple it is for people to trash God and then wonder why the world's going to hell."

You can read the whole thing here, or for something different visit GNN for an interesting tale of a Norwich clergyperson and Global Warming.

Cheers,

LSP

Norwich - don't be fooled.

PS. "Downtown" Norwich was once described to me as "hell with the lid off" - but don't let that put you off.

Hog Poem

Pig

Thanks, GWB, for this New Year Hog Poem - with apologies to the Confederate dead:

There is no crying allowed here past midnight,
But only hogs,
Flying, plunge and expire,
Here by the sagging gate,
Stopped by the wall.

Good hunting,

LSP

Reptilian New Year

Dangerous Reptilian

Its long been suspected that things are not quite as they seem behind the privileged doors of '815', The Episcopal Church's (TEC) spiffy Manhattan H.Q. Above Top Secret reports on the latest round of Ecumenical discussions endorsed by the numbers-small but money-rich denomination:

"Independent sources have claimed an on-going set of face-to-face meetings between U.S. military Episcopal Church officials and extraterrestrial life.

The sources reveal that senior U.S. Navy officers Episcopal Bishops have played a leading role in an inter-services intra-denominational working group responsible for the meetings, and that different extraterrestrial groups are allegedly involved.

One source claims that the contact involves extraterrestrial groups known as Reptilians, and a siliconbased life form dubbed ‘the Conformers’. Another source claims the extraterrestrials are called Ebens from the Zeta Reticuli star system, but known colloquially as the Grays.

TEC Bishop

A third source claims that human looking extraterrestrials representing an association of star nations are liaising with military officials. Two of the sources have been interviewed by this writer who has been aware of their claims for more than a year, and finds them credible."

Thanks, ATS, for for revealing the sinister links between TEC and the Off-World takeover of our planet. Remember, to be forewarned is to be forearmed.

God Bless and Happy New Year.

LSP

Frank Zanzibar

+Frank Weston, 1871-1924

Exited the highway to get a cup of coffee before church; the sun was rising on a beautiful brisk morning and the air was full of the sound of shotguns firing off against doves - which made me want to go for a morning shoot - badly. But I headed off to the Missions instead and preached on John's Prologue and the Incarnation, concluding with the Bishop of Zanzibar, thus:

"You have got your Mass, you have got your Altar, you have begun to get your Tabernacle. Now go out into the highways and hedges where not even the Bishops will try to hinder you. Go out and look for Jesus in the ragged, in the naked, in the oppressed and sweated, in those who have lost hope, in those who are struggling to make good. Look for Jesus. And when you see him, gird yourselves with his towel and try to wash their feet."

Notice that there isn't anything conditional in Bishop Weston's comments on looking and seeing. Well, I'll have to live up to the message...

Shoot straight,

LSP

Boxing Day

Ice Age

Drove through a light dusting of Global Warming to get to the LSP command post in Dallas and a Christmas greeting from my old friend Moet; always a welcome guest. Then it was food, fun and family till well into the night - huge enjoyment. And what's wrong with that, in our puritanical and barbarous times? Nothing at all.

lull before the storm...

Speaking of barbarians, it seems that yet another person has tragically misunderstood The Religion of Peace and set himself alight while trying to blow up an airplane heading to Detroit. A good thing Umar Farouk Abdulmutallab failed. What an evil thing to do, thank God he was stopped.

Have a great Boxing Day and Feast of St. Stephen.

Cheers,

LSP

Merry Christmas

Jowett

Jowett, Master of Balliol, after a mile of walking in silence with the young Augustus Baker,

"Your last observation was singularly commonplace."

Well, I stand judged... Anyway... thanks for reading & following.

Merry Christmas!

LSP

Midnight Jokers

I've stayed out of the Healthcare thing because everyone else has been on it but I've got to say that the comments on Hillbuzz and KOOK's seem right on the money. Death Panels, infanticide, subterfuge, corruption, pork... and the list goes on. Anyway, here's some writing from Hillbuzz via the excellent KOOK's Manifesto, if you haven't read it already:

Claire McCaskill, the second worst Senator alive today, is stirring rebellion in Missouri.

Across the state, images of Claire Bear as The Joker are popping up…caused by Missourians angry at her refusal to stop the government rationing of healthcare through Harry Reid’s dead of night, top secret, forced legislation.

Every single Democrat voting for this monstrous bill is a Joker.

This is not how legislation should be passed. This is not the American way. This is how the Soviet Union and banana republics operated.

UPDATE: Some of you wonder why Claire McCaskill is now just the Second-Worst Living Senator. Previously, she has been listed as the Worst Living Senator in our book. Harry Reid, in our opinion, nudged her out of her title a few weeks back when he started calling opponents of Healthcare Rationing RAAACISTS, and said that opposing what he was doing with this secret, middle of the night legislation was tantamount to supporting slavery. That is so wrong, so inappropriate, and so patently INSANE that we couldn’t help but list him as the Worst of the Worst. McCaskill will, no doubt, regain her title in November 2010 when Reid is booted from office…and she will retain that title until she, too, is removed from the Senate in 2012.

Off to wrap presents now.

LSP

I Like Guns

Found this at Conservative Scallywag. Result.

Must get more of them...

Happy shooting,

LSP