Showing posts with label yet more ACoC tomfoolery. Show all posts
Showing posts with label yet more ACoC tomfoolery. Show all posts

Wednesday, July 13, 2016

Anglican Church of Canada ODs on Zombie Drug



Scores of zombielike Canadian bishops were seen staggering blindly through a Toronto suburb, weeping, babbling and foaming down their purple shirts.

But this wasn't a movie, it was a scene from the Anglican Church of Canada's (ACoC) General Synod. "I thought I was watching The Walking Dead," said one shocked Synod delegate.


Staggering

“These guys were wandering around, stumbling all over the place, and were completely out of it, they didn’t know their whereabouts, and some couldn’t even get up off the floor. One guy, I think it was the Bishop of Ottawa, was even trying to hold himself up with a Johnny pump [fire hydrant]. It was ridiculous.”


Incoherent

The disturbing scenes came after the Synod narrowly failed to vote in favor of allowing same-sex marriage, prompting a number of bishops to "lose it." According to one member of Synod:

"After the initial vote, a lot of people, especially bishops, seemed to lose it. People just kept showing up and then quickly dropping to the ground, flopping over, or crumpling onto the floor. They all seemed oblivious to their surroundings and just couldn't stay on their feet. It was obviously a bad batch of K2."


High on K2

K2 is a form of legal synthetic marijauna, which is known for its dangerous side-effects. After discovering that the Synod had in fact voted in favor of gay marriage rituals, affected members appeared to recover.


Loved Up

Reports that ACoC's bishops have resorted to a deadly mix of K2 and the illegal street drug Ecstasy are unverified.

LSP