Christians have been wondering when the Church of England went off the tracks, and began its downward spiral into becoming a gay advocacy womyn's group. Startling new evidence points to 1941, when a strange object crashed near Cape Girardeau.
A witness claims that the wreckage looked identical to the Church of England, which he described as "a rounded shape with no edges or seams." Police and military were allegedly at the crash scene, where they recovered bodies of what appeared to be CofE bishops and deans.
"It was hard for him to tell if they had on suits or if it was their skin," stated one source, who described the senior clergypersons as having "large, oval-shaped eyes, no noses, just holes and no lips, just small slits for mouths."
Is it possible that space aliens infiltrated the Church of England in the 1940s, and have now spread out to once quiet market towns, like Bury St. Edmunds? Perhaps that would explain the off-world and obviously unfounded rumors of secret "gay annulments" and predatory texts emanating from the hallowed grounds of Bury's Cathedral Close.
While many believe that the Church of England has been the victim of an attack by Extraterrestrials, others claim that things started to go wrong when Henry VIII went ISIS and started chopping off heads.
Cheers,
LSP
