Showing posts with label Western riding. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Western riding. Show all posts

Tuesday, July 9, 2019

The Rise And Fall Of LSP Pt. I - The Horses



It seemed like a good idea to go riding on Friday, so that's what we did. Drove over to Waco, saddled up a couple of half-wild Arabs and went out in the round pen for a warm up.  There you have it, the rise of LSP.

All went well, so we went out in the pasture and stepped it up a bit. Fine, except that the horses weren't used to doing anything outside of a walk/trot in the round pen.


Looks Normal is Crazy

Well I didn't care and urged the uncollected, nervous, rebellious Arab forward and, when she started tossing her head and trying to get back to the barn, I turned her in a tight circle away from temptation. She hated that and went full retard horse spastic at the top of the circle and popped me off. Sic transit, the fall of LSP.

I hit the ground on my hip like a bergan full of wet charcoal landing on concrete, then got up and took stock. Could I walk? No, the old left leg was as mutinous as the horse herself. So I stood there, catching my breath.


Good Arab

The Recruit caught up soon enough, led his better behaved beast back to the barn and brought the truck around with BE. They levered me into the cab and drove to the nearest walk-in ER, which took an X Ray.

Oh dear, the upper femur was fractured below the ball joint joining the bone to the pelvis, a nasty injury, especially if an unstable bone slices through an artery and you bleed out. That hadn't happened, thank God.


Recruit Wearing a Helmet Riding an Arab

Next thing you know a busted up horseman's in an ambulance heading towards Waco central and surgery.

Moral? Never Trust An Arab or You Don't Bounce Like You Used To.

To be continued...

LSP

Friday, June 10, 2016

Get Back in The Saddle, Fool



It's been a little while, but I rode out on Tres this evening before Vespers. Tres is a horse of color who identifies with her biological gender as a mare. Tres is OK with people calling her "her" or "she", that's the kind of pronoun she goes by, at least for now. 

Tres also idolizes a white Stallion, called Whitey McPrivilege. Whitey feels, pretty aggressively I can tell you, that Tres belongs to him. Tres agrees and even seems to like it.


A Saddle on a Truck

I know. By now you're probably feeling a bit sick at the sheer spectacle of this heteronormative, self-imposed cisgender stereotyping. What's wrong with these horses, you're asking. Good question, and I don't know what's got into them, but I do know that Whitey McPrivilege wasn't there when we rode up on the herd.


Is Whitey Here?

They were all horses of color and Whitey wasn't there. Tres was pretty upset, no kidding, so we ran back to the safe space of the barn, fast. Maybe she'd find Whitey there, thought Tres. No, she didn't. Then we ran down to the big cow pasture. Was Whitey there? No, he wasn't. Maybe someone had shot Whitey for being a hate-filed, misogynist gender fascist. Whatever, he wan't there.


Where is Whitey?

Bereft of gender oppression, Tres posted back to the safe space, ate some grass and got turned out. So you see, readers, all six of you, everything turned out alright.

Ride on,

LSP