A Trip To Slap Out

 

Hubbard Texas used to be known as Slap Out on account of their general store typically being slap out of provisions. As of the 2010 census the town was 1,423 persons strong and I like it, well put together for the most part with a lively feed store and a couple of shops and decent country restaurants. Their war memorial's especially impressive, a Cobra gunship which saw service in Vietnam before decommissioning in 1994, when 1 Cav gave it to the town.

After a tasty lunch of cheese enchiladas at Polos Italian Pizza restaurant, I drove over to a churchman's ranch for a sick call. What a great old man, in his 90s, a proud vet, Airforce I think, and an excellent horseman in his day. Pillar of the church to boot. He's weak now but clear of cancer, praise God.

On the way back I stopped in Malone, population 269. It's famous for being German and having saloons or bars, Muleskinners, Pair-A-Dice and Whiskey River. I haven't been in any of these but feel I should.

Whiskey River seems the best and it's owned by a friend who obstinately doesn't come to Mass but cheerfully lets me shoot at his back(ish) country range. A neat guy, a wiry landowner with a piercing eye and a serious, shooting safari hunter. I wish he was Senior Warden of Mission #1 but as it is we're allies.

Malone's also famous for its motel. You see, not so long ago this part of the world was dry, you couldn't get a drink because that was so wicked and unchristian, even though wine features rather strongly in the Bible. As in the Miracle at Cana and the Last Supper. 

No, not Dr. Pepper and non-alcoholic grape juice in a dixie cup. That in mind, people would drive from as far away as Corsicana, population 23, 770, to live it up at Malone's saloons, and then they'd stay in the motel. Smart.

So now you know. I love this part of Texas.

Shoot straight,

LSP

Vicar of Slap Out

When the bishop calls you up and asks you to take on another Mission church you don't say, "No, bishop Iker, I'm awfully sorry but I can't be priest in charge of Slap Out, aka Hubbard." On the contrary, you say "of course, I'd be glad to help out."

was a train station - now  a church hall

So now I get to go to a third church on Sundays and I don't mind that at all. I especially like the congregation, who have good spirit, and the parish hall, which used to be Malone's railway station. The church bought it in the early 1950s, put it on a truck and drove it to Slap Out.

slap out of business

Why was Hubbard called Slap Out? Because, back in the 1860s, customers would go to the General Store only to be told that it was "slap out" of whatever they wanted. 

protestant work ethic

Slap Out's less basic now but it could do with a butcher, a pub, a bakery, and a gun/tack shop, maybe even some kind of book shop, for those of us who like to read. Why is that too much to ask? As it goes, the town has a couple of cafes, a masonic lodge, a feed shop and a pharmacy. It has a war memorial too, in the form of an attack helicopter.

I never in a thousand years would've thought I'd have a cure of souls in Hubbard. Why? I never knew it existed, but now I do and I'm not complaining. 

I like these small Texas towns.

LSP

Look, A Sign!

A member of Team LSP just sent this in, from somewhere in East Texas. Here's another Texan picture, from Hubbard in 1908.

Slap Out

Hubbard used to be called Slap Out in the 1860s but was re-branded after a former Governor in the 1880s. Slap Out has 1,589 citizens as of the last census.

Burning Man

In other news, Big Tex has burnt to a crisp.

Somehow that seems relevant to me.

All for Texas.

LSP