Have you heard of the Consumer Product Safety Commission (CPSC)? Sure you have, they're the ones fixing to regulate gas stoves out of existence. Why? Because Science, obvs. Gas stoves, punters, are really harmful unless they're really taxed. Not unlike the Weather, when you think on it.
The until now unknown CPSC is headed up by Richard Trumka Jr., son of Richard Trumka, an illustrious union lawyer. Trumka Sr., advocate of the working man, died with a nifty socialist net worth of $6 million.
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Nice money if you can make it and it probably helped with Junior's Cornell and Georgetown Law School fees. Who knows, it might even have propelled him to power in the hitherto unknown CPSC. Whatever the case, as of Thursday, Trumka the Younger was all about sorting out the gas stove scourge.
"All options are on the table," said li'l Trumpka to the benighted Bloomberg on Thursday, after Democrat lawmakers including AOC petitioned him to rid the nation of gas stove evil. Get rid of it, they argued, regulate it to death so that we can live, because Science. No more gas stoves for you, you 76 million polluters of your home environment.
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Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez, namesake of the illustrious conqueror of Mexico, is a fan of gas stoves and uses one in her ritzy rental. La Malinche was swift to defend zhirself:
Science evolves and gives us new knowledge with time. There is very concerning science about some of the emissions from gas stoves, especially around the cognitive development of young children, asthma, cancer, etcetera.
This is about a decision about what may be sold and regulations in the far future, OK? So everyone, just take the temperature down a little bit. No secret government agency is going to bust down your door and take your gas stove away.
No secret government agency is going to bust down your door. Quite. The repellent and beastly CPSC has backed down from its inane MillSoc threat to take our gas stoves away, and I'll be honest, I want one, always have. They're just better to cook on and now I want one even more.
Come and bake it,
LSP
