Saturday Sermon

 

Willie Nelson Fixed This

People in London complain because COVID asset strippers killed off landmarks, like Simpson's on the Strand, the Savoy Tailors Guild and great bank branches like Lloyd's Law Courts and the Aldwych/Strand Barclays, which is now an annoyingly overpriced restaurant. And pubs, the Tipperary on Fleet Street (oldest Irish pub in town?) is now no more. 

How very tragic, and I mean that. Hopefully USD will continue to grow in strength so we can buy and save these places, for posterity and the good of all. You can imagine, there we are on the Strand and the monkey produces a battered $20 bill. Helpful simian, "Thank you, monkey, we shall buy this place."

But seriously, Londoners who think they have it bad should visit this rural Texan haven's town square and take stock.

Gary...

Quackers "ice cream parlor" and burger joint? Shut. Axe Throwing startup in our old Citizen's bank, shut. Antique shops, they tried to reinvent this town as an antique shop, shut x 4. Burger King? Shut. 2 of 4 car dealers? Shut. Gold Nugget Pawn? Shut. And the list goes on, small town mercantile carnage. But don't worry, your kid can get a sex change as zhir goes to a highway strip mall for puberty blockers. What a crock.

There's an issue here and a big one. Why can't we, the wealthiest, most powerful nation on the face of the planet make beautiful, livable cities and towns? And for a fact we mostly don't, we've produced one urban sh*thole after another, see Detroit, Chicago, Gary, Dallas, Fort Worth, Atlanta, Baltimore, Milwaukee, Upstate New York and on, take your pick.

Why? Market forces, greed? Sure, all of that and more besides, but it doesn't have to be this way. We have more than enough power and creativity to build places to live in to uplift heart and mind. To do so, we must change or convert our collective soul.

Acknowledging that such a thing exists would be a good start. And then, just maybe, seeing we were wrong to enthrone secular, temporal power in the heart of our towns, in the courthouse on the square. This would've been a cathedral or collegiate church in a better age. I won't bang on.

Let's fix our cities and towns.

Your Pal,

LSP

Total Disaster

 

Saturday morning was great, the leafy glens of old Texas and all of that, no complaints whatsoever. Then disaster struck, like no kidding. The phone, that marvel of handheld computing power rings.

"Hey Dad, my car just exploded, literally exploded."

"Say again?"

"Car exploded."

"Where are you?"

"On I35 at Wintergreen. Firemen here and police."

"You OK?"

"I am, come get me, I'll text the address of the police station."

"On my way."

Off I went down I35 to the precinct at Camp Wisdom Rd. East to RV with the young soldier. He was excited because he was alive, thank God. "Hey kid, good to be picking you up from the right side of the station, eh?" He grinned and showed me photos and videos of his exploded Kia.

Dam. The thing was totaled and he was more than lucky to be alive, no kidding. Apparently he'd been driving down the nightmare expressway that is I35 when he smelled burning and then, boom, an explosive sound from the engine, the vehicle lost power and he managed to glide it onto the verge.

At that point the front of the car was on fire and after bailing out of the death trap the Signalsman retrieved his uniform, laptop and personal possessions from the flaming wreckage. Several minutes later the vehicle exploded.

Well done, boy, and I told him that the angels were most definitely working overtime. We can all imagine vastly worse scenarios. But here's the thing. He needs a new ride and has a liability insurance issue. Solution? 

I upgrade to a new/used fleet One Fiddy and the kid gets the old rig. In the meanwhile, looks like another person's adding their name to the great list of people looking at suing Kia for self-igniting kill cars. Photos to follow.

Moral of the story? Be prepared, this night thy soul may be required of you.  And, of course, don't buy cars which spontaneously ignite. In the meanwhile, the OctoPelosi WMD is threatening Asia. Please Lord, grant us some respite.

Your Pal,

LSP