The Chorus Of The Damned

Back by popular demand: two years of Russiagate coverage in two minutes | pic.twitter.com/vMekLDO3Kt

— Mike (@Doranimated) July 24, 2019

Behold the chorus of the damned. Thanks, Zero.

LSP

Russia Launches Beluga Whales At Western Socialism

Far from resting on his laurels, former KGB strongman Vladimir Putin wasn't content with victoriously installing a Kremlin agent in the White House. He had to go one step further in his bid for total, absolute power by recruiting innocent sea creatures. 

Norway

Shocked Norwegian fishermen discovered at least one beluga whale wearing what appears to be a spy harness, specially fitted to allow Muscovite surveillance. While examining the harness, alarmed scientists discovered cyrillic code, which translated read "Equipment of St. Petersburg." 

Typical Russian Asset

Top scientists believe the whale was part of a Russian naval spying project, intended to subjugate the free atheist nations of the socialist West to a 13% flat tax and Eastern Orthodoxy. But while Belugas are suited to operations in the frozen Arctic, they're less suited to the globally warmed south.

Said one expert, "Belugas are ideal for operations in the Arctic where they are specially adapted to surviving in the harsh environment. Being relatively slow swimmers, Belugas are less suited to some marine mammal missions such as intercepting and marking enemy combat divers."

Putin With Assets

Whether Russia's desperate and risible attempt to subvert the democratic socialism of the West through its patriarchal oppression of sea creatures remains to be seen.

But our cry is simple. Destroy and smash the aquatic hotbeds of oppression, crush the recidivist forces of the enemy and its Hillary-defeating puppet so that, at last, we can be free.

13% Flat Tax And Mass Going Catholic To Boot

Aquatically,

LSP

Thursday Roundup

It's Thursday and the Feast of St. Peter Damian, so what better time for a news roundup. First things first, Jussie Smollett, popularly known as "Juicy" got himself arrested for a nationally televised MAGA hat, hate hoax, bleach noose lynching. 

One of Juicy's better stunts involved writing a check, yes, a CHECK, to his fake MAGA hoax assailants, for $3.5k. Chicago PD's not too pleased and you can watch their reaction above.

In other news, a Coast Guard nut wanted to kill everyone but got caught, thus preventing a false flag detraction from Juicy's interesting story and the rumors of Deep State Mueller's Russian Collusion investigation coming to an end next week. 

With no, ahem, evidence whatsoever of Russian collusion between Trump and the Kremlin. Libs are prepping the field in advance of massive disappointment.  Witch hunt? Surely not.

Speaking of witch, Gateway Pundit's headlining an interesting story on Clinton corruption, you can read part of it here. Hillary, of course, hasn't been locked up yet, unlike Roger Stone who isn't allowed to say anything anymore after he troll posted on Instagram.

Stone was raided at 5 am and dragged out of his house to jail for opposing the Deep State, but Juicy wasn't. Was that because Juicy was part of the DS narrative, unlike Stone? Whatever, Juicy still has its job at Fox whereas the repellent Roseanne Barr was fired for a tweet. Sic transit.

Then there's ISIS brides. They're having buyers remorse and want to return home so that they can have their babies in a world of electricity and running water. Charity notwithstanding, nein danke.

St. Peter Damian was famous for the rigor of his asceticism and reforming the many sins of the 11th century church. This apparently included abuse of minors. Familiar? In the meanwhile, we have to ask.

C'mon, Juicy, why'd you write a check? Watch this, good work Jericho Green.

And in case you're wondering, Yellowstone continues to cook off.

Cheers,

LSP