Saturday, June 9, 2012

Space Aliens Invade Episcopal Church!

You may have missed this important piece of religious news but Jefferts Schori's Episcopal Church (TEC) is in favor of the Covenant. Not the mildly conservative proposal to keep the Anglican Communion together, which TEC hates because it doesn't champion alternative gender strategies, but the Genesis Covenant. The Genesis Covenant is a Green Covenant, sponsored by GreenFaith, a religious organisation that sees the earth and the cosmos as an "embodiment of the divine".

St. David's, Austin, ENS
Genesis Covenant churches get a special GreenFaith certification if they "reduce energy use, save money, and care for god's creation." Or, more specifically, god's body, the "cosmos". If you're thinking that this sounds suspiciously panentheist you might be right; pagans are members of GreenFaith, along with Episcopaliens.

we come in peace, greenpeace
One of the most recent Episcopalien churches to qualify for coveted GreenFaith certification status is St. David's church in Austin, Texas. St. David's will join some 16 other TEC churches, including the prestigious St. Mark's Cathedral, in Seattle, Washington.

But while St. David's works to reduce its carbon footprint, TEC is too, with current membership hemorrhaging at a brisk 50,000 members a year while the shrinking denomination spends millions of dollars in costly lawsuits against traditionalists. The equation's simple, no people + no money = no religious pollution.

Mars needs women
Sorted. The world heaves a sigh of relief.

Rumours that TEC is being run by a mysterious cabal of alien space creatures are entirely without any foundation. Whatsoever.

Stay on the horse,



David and Elizabeth Corey said...

Fine reporting LSP. Hilarious too. Word on the street is that TEC's Pro-choice position is also part of the strategy to reduce its carbon footprint. Aborted babies can't even leave footprints.

LSP said...

They most certainly can't -- much less add to bottom line ASA (average Sunday attendance).