Alien Megastructure in Virginia?

Baffled astronomers believe they may have found an alien megastructure, a star surrounded by a Dyson Sphere, built by ETs.

Stargazing boffins are unable to explain the light fluctuations that the star emits, with one expert stating that the bizarre structure was "really weird."

"We'd never seen anything like this star," said Tabetha Boyajian, "We thought it might be bad data or movement on the spacecraft, but everything checked out. It was really weird." According to Boyajian and her team of researchers, the anomalous star went through "aperiodic dips in flux down to below the 20% level."

Virginia Theological College bills itself as the Episcopal church's "flagship seminary." Its new Immanuel Chapel was consecrated by Presiding Bishop Katharine Jefferts Schori earlier this month, at a service featuring guest preacher Archbishop Justsin Welby. Here's an excerpt from his groundbreaking sermon:

"There is a story of Pooh bear seeking to ride to safety on a honey pot during a flood. And if I remember rightly the story goes that 'sometimes Pooh was on the honey pot and sometimes the honey pot was on Pooh.' Buildings can be like that. Sometimes they are the servants of the Church, and sometimes they are on top, her tyrant."

Starfarer

Honey pot? Perhaps Justsin is unaware of VTS' "married" lesbian homiletics professor, but how to tell? After all, the light from the weird structure is aperiodic and in a state of flux. VTS Dean, Ian Markham, went to King's College London.

That was before he went starfaring.

LSP

Is the Episcopal Church a Frothing Water Feature?

Is the Episcopal Church a frothing water feature? Foaming attractively for the amusement of shoppers in the mallspace of American religion but going, ultimately, nowhere?

Here's the Dean of Virginia Theological Seminary, Ian Markham, gushing from General Convention about the Episcopal Church:

"So why is this General Convention going to be historic? It is because we offer a “product” that our age needs and wants; the immediate cultural war is coming to an end; and we now have leadership in the Church that is ready to be imaginative about our programming for the future. I am confident that in 50 years’ time, the General Convention of 2015 will be the moment that historians identify as the turning moment in the fortunes of The Episcopal Church."

This is Markham foaming about culture:

"now The Episcopal Church is where the majority of Americans are (especially the younger demographic). Large evangelical megachurches are very aware of how they will alienate the young if they are too overtly hostile to the inclusion of gays and lesbians. Being pro-gay is good in modern America; and as we have seen with the Supreme Court decision last week, the affirmation of equality embedded in the American story from its founding finally reaches our gay and lesbian brothers and sisters."

Right on, Ian. All the secular liberals and the people that just don't care are going to start flocking to your gay church. Really? Just like they did with the ordination of women? Maybe you remember how that was going to fill the pews, and dismally didn't.

The Episcopal Church has lost over a quarter of its worshiping attendance in the last decade, some 200,000 people. Let's see if Markham's froth and foam will turn that around.

Your Pal,

LSP