Pool Monkey

Sometimes it makes sense to go to the Verandah Club pool and relax. You can swim up to the bar and order food.

I understand their Lion Burgers are especially good. Two, please. 

In other news, some safaris are offering discounts on life-size monkey trophies. Some people think they'd make good money safes.

"So where's the money?" 

"In the monkey."

Cheers, 

LSP

Pet Lion Sold For Body Parts!!

Everyone's favorite pet lion, Cecil, has been shot by a vicious white cash hunter, and sold for body parts. The world is enraged. Cecil's vital organs can be bought for just:

Liver:  $1000

Heart:  $1800

Lungs:  $1600

Intestine:  $800

Eyes:  $500

So go on, take your pick. It's just "tissue." And if you think our new normal resembles Soylent Green, but only a lot sicker, well, maybe you have a point.

And remember this, Soylent Green is made out of people.

Chow down,

LSP