I wish I could say that Good Friday, and the Triduum in general, somehow become easier as the years go by. But the reverse is true; as our consciences become increasingly alive to the weight of wickedness, so too do we realize our part in the crucifixion. Fortunately Easter is just over the horizon.
As always, Austin Farrer speaks well to this:
EVERYTHING that is true of Christ's body is true of us in some manner. He gives us his body that we may become his body. Christ's body died on the cross, he also rose. The resurrection is ours, but the death also is ours. Many men, at the last challenge, have consented to be martyrs, and set their bodies aside. But Christ's passion was no more than the last expression of what he had done all his life. He had set his body aside whenever its demands conflicted with man's need or God's will, and so he had rehearsed his death continually; not morbidly, but with joy and self-forgetfulness. We have many opportunities so to rehearse our death, and how steadily we reject them! Our bed, our chair retains us when we should get up and pray; fleshly delights of act and imagination, some by no means innocent, hold us from following better inspirations. Our own pleasure comes before our neighbour's, vanity before sympathy. How will it be when rehearsals are over, and we have to act our part, to put our bodies finally off, that we may possess God? If Christ offers us up with his own death in this sacrament, it is that we may die a voluntary and daily death, and merit a daily resurrection.
How will it be when rehearsals are over?
Pray for mercy.
LSP