The Vatican Goes Green!

Pope Francis' Vatican has issued tough new directives requiring priests and seminarians to go green and take the "emerging planetary crisis" seriously by having an "ecological conversion."

Rome's eco-directive, called "The Gift of the Priestly Formation," goes on to state that “it will be necessary for future priests to be highly sensitive to this theme and, through the requisite Magisterial and theological guidance, help to acknowledge the appeal, immensity and urgency of the challenge we face.”

Typical Global Warming

Here at the Compound we take the urgency of the War on Weather very seriously indeed. That's why we favor the workmanlike Glock 21 and its 13 rounds of .45 ACP stopping power, capable of unnerving accuracy in the most adverse weather conditions.

A Glock and a Spyrderco in the War on Weather

Some prefer the mighty .357 Magnum, but here's a thought.When the emerging planetary crisis has taken 6 rounds and you have to reload, the Glock 21's still firing.

Lead downrange, in the War on Weather.

LSP

Monster Gas Cloud Heads Towards Earth

A massive cloud of hot gas is heading towards earth and an inevitable collision with our galaxy. Known as Episcopal Bishops Respond to Primates (EBRP) or the "Curry Cloud" for short, the huge gas cloud is thought to have originated close to home.

Curry

“Our galaxy is recycling its gas through clouds, the Curry Cloud being one example, and will form stars in different places than before,” said a spokesperson for the Space Telescope Science Institute in Baltimore, Maryland.

Budde

While astronomers are still attempting to explain why the cloud moved away from our galaxy in the first place, evidence from the Hubble telescope indicates that it has a high sulfur content. Some even theorize that the immense cloud of gas was caused by "dark matter."

Brookhart

According to an an astronomer with the National Radio Astronomy Observatory, “There are theoretical calculations suggesting that a dark matter satellite could capture gas as it passes through the Milky Way disk and that may be the amazing circumstance we are witnessing.”

Bruno

The Curry Cloud has been poetically described by stargazing boffins as "what goes up must come down."

Whalon

Mysterious radio signals emanating from the hurtling cloud of superheated gas are currently under investigation, but Ufologists may be in for a disappointment. "It's just gas," said one expert, "really, really hot gas."

Reeves

The Anglican Consultative Council (ACC) was unavailable for comment.

LSP