Miserable Offenders

It sounds simple and it should be simple. As the heat climbs ever higher, turn on the AC and enjoy the cooling blast of chilled air. 

That's the myth. The reality is you turn on the air and all you get is a groan and a hiss as the temperature in the house approaches ovenlike intensity. 

Broken Rubbish

What do you do when that happens? Get out the fans, open the large screened windows and start to melt while you call the HVAC tech. But hey, whoever said the War on Weather'd be easy?

El Nino Will Build The Wall

Speaking of which, Senator Ted Cruz has sensibly suggested that we use El Nino's confiscated millions to build the much-needed border wall. Good call.

Your Old Pal,

LSP

Texas Floods!

Those of you who know I35 know that it's a difficult, treacherous and brutish highway. Now it's flooded, and desperate refugees make their way over the watery grave of this once great transit corridor on the floating debris of abandoned farms and derelict strip malls. 

A Typical Texas Street Scene

It's like Waterworld, but worse, far worse. Smart people had boats and got to them in time, others had the good fortune, or was it good sense? to live on high ground. They were the lucky ones.

El Nino

If only this once great state had had the foresight and sheer common sense to acknowledge the settled science of anthropocentric global warming and pay its weather tax. If only. Now that opportunity is gone and Texas is yet another victim, a casualty, in the War on Weather.

Your Friend,

LSP

Clean Your Gun, it's Sunday

It's a pretty typical Sunday afternoon, here at the Compound; Gun cleaning, a late lunch consisting of a bollo and something advertising itself as "Beef Bologna." I find Duke's mayonnaise helps with this, but hey, go for second best Hellman's, there's no "rule."

Iraqi Forces Wave Captured Weather Flag

As I reflect on this, my mind goes to this morning's Gospel, in which Jesus warns of "false Christs" and "false prophets." No shortage of those, right about now. Speaking of which, Bernie Sanders blames our ancient adversary, The Weather, for the recent terrorist attacks in Paris.

El Nino

Does The Weather know no bounds? Will it stop at nothing in its ongoing attempt to destroy our civilization and overthrow everything we hold right and true? Apparently not, which is why our first installment of Climate Change Refugees landed in New Orleans this Saturday. I guess they're running from El Nino.

What. Could. Possibly. Go. Wrong.

LSP

El Nino Escapes

The War on Weather took a serious turn for the worse with the dramatic escape of El Nino, a renowned weather kingpin.

El Nino's jailbreak has brought a surge of humid, wet and stormy weather to the once arid state of Texas, causing local residents to suggest taking matters into their own hands.

"El Nino's loose and wrecking everything," said one angry Texan, "The Government isn't doing anything about it, but I've got guns and there's only one of it. We're fixing to shoot it."

In related news, the oil giant, Exxon, is being investigated by New York's Attorney General for climate crime, and traitorously giving aid to our enemy, The Weather.

That wouldn't have anything to do with the company's partnership with Rosneft, or it's stunning failure to sponsor the Clinton Foundation. And the Benghazi massacre was caused by a video that no-one had ever seen.

El Nino is still at large.

LSP