London Cryptids - The Mullally

 

London, England, is home to many mysterious creatures unacknowledged by conventional science,  such as Springheel Jack, the Highgate Vampire, the Nameless Thing of Berkeley Square, the River Thames Monster and the Mullally.

The Mullally is reportedly a shortsighted half-man, half-woman and manifests itself as an Anglican bishop figure, terrifying onlookers with sexual innuendo and fearsome teeth. Colloquially known as "Bishop of London," the Mullally attempts to hypnotize its hearers with dysphoric doublethink.

"It's just plain ugly," said one clergyman on condition of anonymity. However, the Justsin Welby, another famous London cryptid, disagreed, “I will be extremely joyfully celebratory of these new [gay prayers of gay blessing]." Much like the Mullally, the Justsin Welby instantiates as a bishop figure but witnesses report it will not perform gay blessings out of concern for "pastoral care." 

Scientific consensus rules against sightings of cryptids like the Mullally and the Welby, "They're just fevered products of overheated imagination, not bishops at all," stated a former member of the Church of England's Catholic Group.

Here at the Compound we're inclined to agree with the skeptics.

That is all,

LSP