Sunday, August 1, 2021

British Cryptids



Great Britain's no stranger to the weird and wonderful, to mysterious creatures which may or may not be real. Experts, brave enough to look beyond the dogma of current scientific orthodoxy call them "cryptids," creatures that aren't proved by science, until they are. Here at the Compound we're pleased to present a sample of these beasts from the Sceptered Isle.


The Mullally


The Mullally. Long thought to be a lingering remnant of pagan devotion to the corn goddess, the Mullally mythos starts in Devon and became popularized in the 17th century children's song, "Mullally, Mullally, we all fall down." Sightings of the large toothed cryptid are currently confined to London. 


The Southwark


The Mullally is not to be confused with the Southwark, popularly known as the Streatham Werewolf and famous for howling, "I'm the Southwark, it's what I do!" Recent sightings of this half-man, half- something else seem to indicate the Southwark has grown less aggressive in recent years.


Boy


Moving North, reports are coming in about a strange creature locals call "Boy."  Boy, apparently a holdover from an age where biological sex and dentistry was somehow blurred, stalks the winding, cobbled streets of Gloucester, a cathedral city labouring under an ancient curse.


So Faull


To the Northeast, local legend talks of the Faull, part man, part woman, who haunts the onetime Royalist port of Bristol. Witnesses report earsplitting shrieks, cutting the night, "Am I a man!?!"


The Nameless Thing


Then there's the Nameless Thing. A vampire?

Cheers,

LSP

8 comments:

  1. I think sexual tension is what drives a lot of these critters.

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  2. LSP: On FB I mentioned your pieces on British Cryptids, Devil People and Vatican Grindr, with a link. FB within two seconds fired counterbattery on me, blocked my post with an air burst of Violation of Community Standards. Nice to know I am in good company. I posted the same on my bloggy, with no repercussions.

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  3. Why would anyone go to church to listen to these gender-confused people?

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  4. The photographs remind me of hearing that "backpfeifengesicht" translates to "a face you'd like to slap" or thereabouts in English, but not knowing German, nor for the most part, English either, cannot confirm that. But it looks right, don't it? Just don't ax me how to pronounce it!

    As Dizzy Dean once said, I do know the King's English. I know the Queen is English, too.

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  5. Sgt, fstasi, insta and twister HATE lsp. Can't think why.

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  6. Now that, LL, is a very good point.

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  7. WWW, "syntax, as in 'diction.'"

    To put it another way, long live the Czar and crush Commies underheel.

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