Showing posts with label the Dalek. Show all posts
Showing posts with label the Dalek. Show all posts

Sunday, March 18, 2018

The Awesomness Of Houston



One of the best things about Houston is its awesome Dalek. Conveniently situated in Uptown, the mythic Dalek shines its protective light upon the citizens of its city. We welcomed that on our way to the rodeo.

Good work, Houston Livestock Show and I tell you, rodeo's exciting, skilled, patriotic, wholesome, and all 'round uplifting. Just watching the horsemanship of the pickup riders was a boost, to say nothing of the competitors.




What's the best thing about rodeo? That's hard to say because so many things are good about it, but I like the hi-octane adrenaline . Man and beast going at it fast and if you're a bull, furiously. Were there any progleft, libshill, comsymp globalists in the stadium? If there were, I didn't see any and that's good too.




Then there's the carnival. That's a big deal too and I checked out a deep fried Oreo for the first time only to discover that it's essentially an Oreo cookie in a donut. Neat, but not that exciting, unlike the Slingshot ride, which was top level fun.




What happens is this. A couple of bullethead fairground Serbs stand on a metal platform, dancing to rap music in the disco light of the ride. They wear white shirts, their uniform, and beckon you onto the platform. "Don't fear kebab," they tell you as you're harnessed into the round cage of the mighty Slingshot.




Then the Slingshot hurls you into the air and you hang there, far, far above the fairground while the cage slowly rotates until you're looking down in wonder at the minuscule carnies. You hurtle down, only to be shot back up so you can do it all over again. This happens several times in the ten seconds of forever. Result, I want a Slingshot.




Rides and rodeo over, we headed back to base and the security of the Dalek, a great time had by all. Houston, you proved your awesomeness yet again, well done.

God bless,

LSP

Sunday, October 29, 2017

We Drove Through Fire To Get To Houston



No fooling, the team was driving to Houston when all of a sudden, out of nowhere, the traffic on I45 slowed to a standstill. Why? Because the road was on fire. Seriously, smoke was drifting across the highway thanks to some Anarcho-Marxist setting the verge on fire in an act of random highway terrorism.


Win The Firefight

We fought through the obstacle, hoping that the fire didn't spread to the surrounding brush and cause a conflagration, engulfing Leon County. It didn't, thank God, and before you could say phony Russian collusion story, the fabled towers of Houston were looming in the windshield of the rig.


MAGA Loves Gold

Then it was time for the inner loop and MAGAland as the sun bounced golden off the glassy sides of Houston's infamous Dalek. A great result and somehow teaching. "Round or flat?" asked the Cadet (potential), staring into the boundlessly flat horizon. 


Obviously Flat Quite Possibly Hollow

"That's easy, son. It's obviously flat and quite possibly hollow. Think Hillary's failed bid for presidential power."

Later that evening we celebrated at the Lux and I tell you this, a good time was had by all, except maybe the waiter who was from the Ukraine and serving tables after being canned by Fusion GPS. His name was "Slavo", curiously.


Go On LSP, Starch That Shirt And Tackle The Brulee

So well done, Houston, you're a fun place to visit, even if you have to dodge the McLarens and Bentley soft tops. But maybe that's half the charm.

Mind how you go,

LSP