Showing posts with label Melania Mondays!. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Melania Mondays!. Show all posts

Monday, July 16, 2018

Melania Mondays!



Readers of this internationally respected mind blog are still reeling from frightening images of failed presidential candidate Hillary Clinton, and who can blame them? 

Here at the Compound we understand that, which is why we're delighted to lift everyone's spirits with another installment of Melania Mondays!




America's popular and glamorous First Lady's been busy flying the flag in style. She met the Queen at Windsor Castle.




Well known for her love of children and veterans, she visited with Chelsea Pensioners and school children in London.




Blenheim Palace got a look in too, with one commentator describing Melania as looking "ethereal" and like a "Disney Princess;" unlike Britain's famous traitor, Theresa May, who didn't.




Then it was on to Finland for the Helsinki summit, where the First Lady met with her counterpart, Jenni Haukio, before the President's meeting with Vladimir Putin.




Melania attended the press conference following the historic meeting, where both leaders laid out sensible objectives for bilateral cooperation.




As a sign of goodwill, President Trump was given a Russian football, which he cheerfully passed to a smiling First Lady.




On behalf of us all, well done Melania for doing your part to make America great again.

MAGA,

LSP

Monday, April 16, 2018

Melania Mondays!



Some of you might not be too happy today. Perhaps it's our massive debt, the leering face of Lyin' Comey peering out at you from everywhere, Hillary not being in jail, and the wall still not built. Or war, maybe that's got you down. But whatever the case, here at Melania Mondays! we want to turn that around.


Looking Good in Black

America's popular and glamorous First Lady's been busy looking good, even though she's spurned by the millionaire socialist fashion industry. They favored Michelle Obama, who appeared on the cover of at least 30 US fashion magazines, including Vogue.


See What You've Been Spared?

See? Right out of the gate we've got a reason to celebrate, Michelle isn't on the cover page anymore. Neither is Melania, because she's not a Democrat but that's OK, she doesn't have to be. Thanks to the miracle of the internet, we can see her everywhere. Sorry, legacy media.


Christmas With Melania

And what do we see, the smartest, best looking First Lady we've ever had? There, another reason to turn that frown upside down.


Looking Good in White

President Trump has declared that Melania's his "rock." Well said, Mr. President and well done Melania for doing your part to make America great again.




MAGA,

LSP

Monday, December 25, 2017

Melania Mondays! Christmas Special



Christmas, Monday, Melania. All of these words fit together which is why we're delighted to bring you a Melania Mondays! Christmas special. 

America's popular and glamorous First Lady is a devout Catholic but went ecumenical last night by attending an Episcopal church for Midnight Mass, Bethesda-by-the-Sea. The Rector, a former Navy Chaplain, preached about Nelson Mandela.




Undaunted by the sermon, the congregation gave Melania and her husband a standing ovation and who can blame them? The presidential couple are all about giving everyone a Merry Christmas instead of the miserable NWO "Happy Holidays."



After the service, Melania returned to Mar-a-Lago, which serves as a "Winter Whitehouse," where she spoke to children on the phone who'd called NORAD to locate Santa Claus. Melania is well known for her love of children.




Speaking at a Toys for Tots event at Joint Base Anacostia-Bolling earlier this year, Melania said, "It is my hope that during this holiday season, people will remember it is not about gifts - it is about family, service and gratitude. We must continue to look out for, and help each other.”




Thank you, First Lady, for looking out for our country and doing your part to make America great again. MAGA.

Merry Christmas!

LSP

Sunday, December 24, 2017

Monday, September 18, 2017

Melania Mondays! STEM Edition




What's Monday without Melania Mondays!? Not much of a Monday at all, enough to make you want to shoot the whole day down. Which is why we're delighted to bring you another episode in the life of America's attractive and glamorous First Lady.


Note Heels

After helping people in hurricane disaster zones, you'd think that Melania would take a well needed rest, after all, she deserves it. But no, she's been uplifting and inspiring children, promoting STEM (science, technology, engineering, math) education at a youth center.


Maternal Melania

"Hi sweethearts," said the maternal First Lady as she entered the room of aspiring technologists, "Welcome Mrs. Trump" said a giant heart in red marker.


Don't Mess With This Woman

Melania presented the lucky children with a White House coloring book, "This is the Oval Office, where the President sits and makes all the decisions. You could make a pink room in the White House," said the Presidential Consort to the children, after enjoying their adorable Legos.


Coat Dress

After playing paper airplanes with the STEM students, the most attractive world leader in the world encouraged the kids, "You're doing very well. This is the way to learn."

Yes, and how much easier to learn with the help of Melania at your side? 


Leader

Thank you, First Lady, for doing your part to make America great again.

MAGA,

LSP

Monday, September 11, 2017

Melania Mondays!



There's no mistaking that the anniversary of the World Trade Center atrocity is somber. But this doesn't mean that the popular series, Melania Mondays! sleeps. On the contrary.




America's First Lady paid her respects to the fallen today, wearing a basic black coat dress by Michael Kors. Did she look good? Most definitely.




But look into Melania's eyes and ask yourself, would I cross this woman? If you've just answered "Yes, I would," look again and revise your faulty opinion.




Well done, Melania, for lifting our spirits, terrifying our enemies and doing your part to Make America Great Again.

MAGA,

LSP


Monday, July 31, 2017

Melania Mondays!



Like Fortuna herself, White House Communications Directors come and go but one thing remains constant. That's right, Melania Mondays! bringing you uplifting news of America's glamorous and popular First Lady. 




Melania's not been idle, far from it. The former Yugoslavian model has sparked a tourist boom in Slovenia, inspired children, encouraged interns at the White House and booked a trip to Canada, where she's set to lead the US delegation at the Invictus games in Toronto.


Melania Looks Kindly At Wintour

Not shabby, and even Vogue, the world famous transsexual magazine, is so impressed that it's praised Melania for defining First Lady style. But that's not all.




According to the ever-reliable NBC, the First Lady's "disgusted" at Mooch's language and who can blame her? Well done, Melania, for taking a stand for decency and professionalism; after all, it's the White House, not a scene from Good Fellas.




Thank you, First Lady, for continuing to do your part to make America great again.

MAGA,

LSP

Monday, February 27, 2017

Melania Mondays!



Here we are again, bringing you, the reader, another uplifting installment of Melania Mondays! and we're pleased to present this picture of America's glamorous First Lady, submitted by a well known member of the intelligence community. Here she is, looking studious.

Studious Melania

What else has Melania been up to, when she's not working hard at the desk, suing malefactors and making America great again?


Governor's Ball Melania

Not going to the millionaire socialist, slap-on-the-back-fest Oscars, that's for sure. Instead the popular presidential consort was hosting the Governor's Ball in DC and looking good. All in pleasant contrast to previous First Ladies.


First Lady

Well done, Melania, keep it up!

LSP

Monday, February 20, 2017

Melania Mondays!



It's that time of the week again, the best time of the week, that's right, Monday, Melania Monday! So what's America's popular and glamorous First Lady been up to? Only leading a Florida rally, and by proxy the nation, in prayer.


God-Fearing Melania

God-fearing Melania opened the Presidential rally at Orlando-Melboune Airport with the Lord's Prayer last Saturday, causing leftist heads to explode in paroxysms of scorn and derision. One antisocial media user, Harry Benson (@TrumpUriNation) went to far as to blasphemously accuse Melania of being a "whore." Benson's Twitter page no longer exists.


Melania Prays. Demons Hate Prayer

People that are possessed hate the Lord's Prayer, it makes them lash out in furious rage; the demons that drive them don't like it, you see. Perhaps that says something about the left in general and the critics of Melania's prayer in particular. You be the judge.




In the meanwhile, well done Melania for leading the nation in prayer. Keep up the good work!

God bless,

LSP

Monday, January 23, 2017

Melania Mondays!



You've been waiting for it, we've all been waiting for it. Yes, Melania Mondays! is back, bringing you the latest in the life of America's glamorous First Lady. And what news it's been, as the former Slovenian model stepped out before the nation and the world at her husband's Inauguration.

Was she poised? Yes. Elegant? Undoubtedly. Did she make Jackie Kennedy look somehow frumpy? Some say that she did.


The Military Love Melania

Was the Sargeant who got to dance with her at the Armed Forces Ball a lucky man? Yes, he undoubtedly was. Is she the best looking First Lady ever? 


Melania gives the Magic Muslim and SloJo The Look

Maybe not to Rosie O'Donnell, laughably narcissistic Shia LeBoeuf, aging poptart Madonna and deranged Ashley Judd, but to everyone else the answer's obvious. Yes she is.




Well done, Melania, for doing your not inconsiderable best to make America great again. The nation is grateful.

MAGA,

LSP

Monday, December 19, 2016

Melania Mondays!



Hey everyone, it's time for Melania Mondays! and the latest news in the life of our nation's stylish and popular First Lady.

Unsurprisingly, designers are lining up to dress the glamorous presidential consort. Diane von Furstenburg, Tommy Hillfiger, Sam and Libby Edelman and now Calvin Klein.




When asked by a reporter if he would make clothes for Melania, Klein stated the obvious, "Of course I would." 


Michelle Obama in a gunny sack, right, with two women

Other dress makers have been less forthcoming, preferring to outfit Michelle Obama in what some commentators call "gunny sacks."




That's over now. Thanks, Melania!

LSP